rws177

I'm the speaker at a meeting tonight and more or less freaking out. It's in 4hrs and I am not one to speak in public, in fact it's one of my biggest fears more so than death. I work full time and take classes at night, told my advisor that public speaking is to be the last class I will take ever, thats how bad this is for me!

A few weeks ago I fought in a major jiujitsu tournament up in Chicago. I remember being shaky and freaked out that more than 2,000 people were watching me in the bleachers, more so than than the guy jumping around in front of me shaking out his wrists that I was about to fight....How messed up is that?! For that I closed my eye's, said the lords prayer, then kept repeating in my head "I'm a bad mother "!$!#$" over and over, lol. Something tells me this mental exercise will not be effective for this evening.

Anyways I am thinking about reading over my one year story I posted on here and just using that as an outline to go with. I'm not going to use notes or anything and just talk from the heart as the speech is going to be a train wreck of me turning red and shaking regardless. I'm just freaking out right now and really don't want to do this at all

Stobert

Just do the part of your post I quoted from your post, especially the "from the heart" part, forget the rest and it'll be good. I know, it's easier said than done. Post later and tell us how it went.

SoberNVa

I know just how you feel. I felt exactly the same way the first time I had to speak.Hell I offered my sponsor 20 bucks to get me out of it. LOL. I was kidding with her of course but yeah I was nervous as heck.. you will do fine. Just speak from the heart,tell what it was lilke,what happened and what it is like now.every person sitting there who has spoken from the podium before has been there and knows just how you feel.

bellakeller

I spoke the other night for the first time. As long as I got out of my own way, I was OK, but I had to keep shoving myself out of the way while remembering that though my story is about me, the actual telling of it is not. Does that make any sense?

Also, I was told to wear pants and that was helpful.

Good luck. You'll do great!!

firewalkwithme

its awesome you do jiujitsu, i did that for about six months and loved it though short-lived...

you'll do fine...let us know how it goes. good luck.

CarolD

The reason you are speaking is to offer hope
to 1 person who will be there.

A quick prayer..."let my words help someone"

It's not a performance ..it's simply sharing. from a podium...not a chair.

omegasupreme

My experience shows that when I share it is most effective when I am a hollow bone...let that Power demonstrate through me what It can do.

LosingmyMisery

Good luck. You can do this and it will be very helpful. I had a great fear of public speaking, just like you. AA helped me to overcome that. It is something that I never could have imagined. The thought of speaking, in a group, would send me into a full blown panic attack. That has passed. Let us know how it goes. I bet you will feel fantastic after facing your fear.

rws177

Thank you for all the kind words everyone!

It feels like I am having a panic attack right now so I will let everyone know how it goes when I get home later. It's in just two more hours...I am still pretending I am about to fight and not thinking about it too much and will try to just do my best when the moment arrives.

bellakeller

I wanted to add that my friend in recovery told me just before I got up to speak that if I was nervous that meant I was just going to tell the honest truth. I don't know if that helps at all but it helped me.

CarolD

Don't forget to shower and eat ...listen to your favorite music
relax....and move forward ..you will do super....

TwelveSteps

You'll do great. I've probably gone to at least 300 speaker meetings since I started AA and I've never found myself saying, "Wow, that was not a very good share" -- I always got something out of it even if the speaker seemed nervous or disorganized. Everyone will appreciate your service and you'll be among friends. Good luck!

GG

ReadyAndAble

Sound advice for just about any occasion, lol.

Dee74

best of luck rws - I think you'll ace it

rws177

Well I did it and it went amazingly well. At first I felt red, flushed and shaky. Then things just started to flow with eaze. I talked for almost 10min, right now I feel on top of the world so I am glad that I did it, even though I was scared and angry when asked.

Zebra1275

Glad to hear it went well!

LexieCat

Cool! I really suggest you consider taking a speaking commitment every so often, if you have the opportunity. It is a great way to share your ES&H with others, get out to different meetings, and as a bonus, you will learn to be more comfortable in front of a group.

You never know when something you say might be EXACTLY what someone else needs to hear. There's a guy in one of my groups who was sort of a "tough guy" bar-drinker, who said he was stunned in his early recovery when he heard someone share "his story"--and the speaker was a nun!

rws177

My sponsor called me this morning at work saying he had a few guys from the meeting call him saying I gave a "really sincere and heartfelt talk" so that is good. Public speaking is my biggest fear so I’m glad to be getting some positive feedback on this.

MsCooterBrown

I was thinking you would do great once you started! Good for you RWS..