Two Different People...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Bethlehem, PA.
Posts: 1,781
Two Different People...
Did you ever know anyone that was somewhat intoxicated almost all of the time. I mean to the point that they almost seemed like 2 different people, the person with alcohol in their system and the completely sober version.
When I grew up I had an uncle (who died when I was about 17), with alcohol in his system he was the life of the party, he could talk endlessly about almost anything. He ran an auto repair shop and was able to function quite well as long as he kept his blood alcohol levels somewhat stable.
He had to get a minor operation and was in the hospital for several days at one point and therefore could not drink. I still remember talking to him after he got out and it was a completely different person. He had nothing to say, seemed very irritable and the best you could get out of him was a yes or no answer. This was not the person I knew.
As soon as he got his blood alcohol levels back up to par he magically became his old self again. In retrospect I think he had lost his real self sowewhere in a sea of alcohol. He died at the age of 52 of a heart attack and I have no doubt that his alcohol use had a lot to do with his premature death.
I also know a few people that got divorced shortly after getting sober, it would seem that the changes were more than they could deal with. It does seem that alcohol can really take over the core of who a person is.
When I grew up I had an uncle (who died when I was about 17), with alcohol in his system he was the life of the party, he could talk endlessly about almost anything. He ran an auto repair shop and was able to function quite well as long as he kept his blood alcohol levels somewhat stable.
He had to get a minor operation and was in the hospital for several days at one point and therefore could not drink. I still remember talking to him after he got out and it was a completely different person. He had nothing to say, seemed very irritable and the best you could get out of him was a yes or no answer. This was not the person I knew.
As soon as he got his blood alcohol levels back up to par he magically became his old self again. In retrospect I think he had lost his real self sowewhere in a sea of alcohol. He died at the age of 52 of a heart attack and I have no doubt that his alcohol use had a lot to do with his premature death.
I also know a few people that got divorced shortly after getting sober, it would seem that the changes were more than they could deal with. It does seem that alcohol can really take over the core of who a person is.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by BackToSquareOne 
I also know a few people that got divorced shortly after getting sober, it would seem that the changes were more than they could deal with...
...It does seem that alcohol can really take over the core of who a person is.
I know a guy who is a saint when he is sober. Problem is, he is a con-artist and a thief when he is not sober. He is still struggling even today. It only takes me about 10 seconds to detect the difference.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 92
Yes, I can relate to that. My brother, who is also struggling with a drinking problem is one who comes in mind. And probably I am too, though I seem to find myself back again after 16 days sober now.
Also: "One of the most common traits that all researchers have noted among serial killers is heavy use of alcohol." Under the influence sure can change a person in any way. Serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer comes to mind, who even blamed the booze for acting out his fantasies. Makes me think if such a person was never struck by alcoholism...
Also: "One of the most common traits that all researchers have noted among serial killers is heavy use of alcohol." Under the influence sure can change a person in any way. Serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer comes to mind, who even blamed the booze for acting out his fantasies. Makes me think if such a person was never struck by alcoholism...
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
I found myself becoming a trio....
tho this is slightly off topic.
Carol...who arrived at a bar..dressed nicely..hair done. make up on
a warm smile of anticapation for a drink and drinking companions.
Barbara -who appeared around drinks 6/7...smile turned into loud attention
seeking laughter..hair falling down...flirting with strangers..belle of the bar
Delores..drinks 10 or 12...sat in the cornor..tears coming...endlessly
repeateing to the bartender and anyone close by.....
"I'm so sorry....have I paid the check? Did I call a cab?
What happened to my purse/coat or shoes?
What's your name again honey?"
Several of my late night places .."If you are doing a Delores
don't even sit down...we are running a happy bar"
Gee.........I'm so grateful to now be....Carol here a recovered AA alcoholic...
tho this is slightly off topic.
Carol...who arrived at a bar..dressed nicely..hair done. make up on
a warm smile of anticapation for a drink and drinking companions.
Barbara -who appeared around drinks 6/7...smile turned into loud attention
seeking laughter..hair falling down...flirting with strangers..belle of the bar
Delores..drinks 10 or 12...sat in the cornor..tears coming...endlessly
repeateing to the bartender and anyone close by.....
"I'm so sorry....have I paid the check? Did I call a cab?
What happened to my purse/coat or shoes?
What's your name again honey?"
Several of my late night places .."If you are doing a Delores
don't even sit down...we are running a happy bar"
Gee.........I'm so grateful to now be....Carol here a recovered AA alcoholic...
Adjusting my Sails
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,021
Yes this is a core issue for many alcoholics. Alcohol is a mind altering substance and for me that is the very purpose of using and abusing it. To change what I perceive myself to be into a person that I either perceive as better (social, out going, without fear, etc) or to numb myself from the feelings that I am not.....well.....who I am not, or the person who I think I am supposed to be but always fall short of being because that person does not exist.
Healing, also known as recovering is understanding who I am and accepting the unique beauty in me and life.
A change of perception was needed, alcohol worked for a while, then it became the problem that led to real permanent change.
I was boring at first when I stopped drinking because I had been using alcohol to change my personality for so long. Now, after some healing time I have accepted who I am and the authentic creation that I am is coming out without the aid of a substance. Even the term boring has been replaced with peaceful solace.
I'm don't have to be everything to everyone. I don't even have to be everything to anyone. I have to be myself and allow some people to accept me and some to reject me.
And they do lol.
Healing, also known as recovering is understanding who I am and accepting the unique beauty in me and life.
A change of perception was needed, alcohol worked for a while, then it became the problem that led to real permanent change.
I was boring at first when I stopped drinking because I had been using alcohol to change my personality for so long. Now, after some healing time I have accepted who I am and the authentic creation that I am is coming out without the aid of a substance. Even the term boring has been replaced with peaceful solace.
I'm don't have to be everything to everyone. I don't even have to be everything to anyone. I have to be myself and allow some people to accept me and some to reject me.
And they do lol.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 426
I can recall, on numerous rough mornings after, doing my best to avoid the locked gaze of an individual I'd grandly offended the night before and hearing - 'I don't even know who you are anymore'. I couldn't help much as I didn't know either. In those days, when stone cold sober was also not an option, I felt best received by the world at about 4 drinks in... It became like a tightrope act to walk the line between presentable and gutter worthy. 4 most often became, if not always, became 10-15, and there I was, another morning after, hearing those words again.
King of Fools
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Philadelphia,PA
Posts: 52
I'm no expert but I'd have to assume this happens to most of us with alcohol related problems...I know I was two different people. I'm one of the shyest, quietest, laid-back, hesistant, nervous personalities around, when not drinking. You get a few drinks in me I get to be the talkative "happy" outgoing guy (which is what I always tried to be and thought I wanted). The way you described your Uncle could almost pass for the way I am to a lot of people around me in terms of the yes/no responses and seeming frustrated etc., when not boozing.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Wappingers Falls, NY
Posts: 618
Re:Two Different People...
Originally Posted by BackToSquareOne
Did you ever know anyone that was somewhat intoxicated almost all of the time. I mean to the point that they almost seemed like 2 different people, the person with alcohol in their system and the completely sober version.
When I grew up I had an uncle (who died when I was about 17), with alcohol in his system he was the life of the party, he could talk endlessly about almost anything. He ran an auto repair shop and was able to function quite well as long as he kept his blood alcohol levels somewhat stable.
He had to get a minor operation and was in the hospital for several days at one point and therefore could not drink. I still remember talking to him after he got out and it was a completely different person. He had nothing to say, seemed very irritable and the best you could get out of him was a yes or no answer. This was not the person I knew.
As soon as he got his blood alcohol levels back up to par he magically became his old self again. In retrospect I think he had lost his real self sowewhere in a sea of alcohol. He died at the age of 52 of a heart attack and I have no doubt that his alcohol use had a lot to do with his premature death.
I also know a few people that got divorced shortly after getting sober, it would seem that the changes were more than they could deal with. It does seem that alcohol can really take over the core of who a person is.
When I grew up I had an uncle (who died when I was about 17), with alcohol in his system he was the life of the party, he could talk endlessly about almost anything. He ran an auto repair shop and was able to function quite well as long as he kept his blood alcohol levels somewhat stable.
He had to get a minor operation and was in the hospital for several days at one point and therefore could not drink. I still remember talking to him after he got out and it was a completely different person. He had nothing to say, seemed very irritable and the best you could get out of him was a yes or no answer. This was not the person I knew.
As soon as he got his blood alcohol levels back up to par he magically became his old self again. In retrospect I think he had lost his real self sowewhere in a sea of alcohol. He died at the age of 52 of a heart attack and I have no doubt that his alcohol use had a lot to do with his premature death.
I also know a few people that got divorced shortly after getting sober, it would seem that the changes were more than they could deal with. It does seem that alcohol can really take over the core of who a person is.
~God bless~
Member
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 224
I've been off the booze for about a week now, and been pending plenty of time feeling sorry for myself and depressed in front of the TV. There I discovered the United States of Tara, a HBO sitcom about a house wife with DID, aka multiple personality disorder.
I fell in love with it! Blacking out and coming to having no idea what you did or why people are angry or why there are flower pots in the oven . . . I completely relate!!
: )
I fell in love with it! Blacking out and coming to having no idea what you did or why people are angry or why there are flower pots in the oven . . . I completely relate!!
: )
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: California
Posts: 377
Alcohol effected me like that. Sober I was very much a closed person. Kept to myself most of the time, and rarely engaged in lengthly conversations. Why? Well because I was usually hungover, and I just didnt like being sober. So that reflected out towards others. But when I was Drunk! I was very out going, could spend hours talking about useless garbage, enjoyed people around me etc etc.
Towards the end of my drinking, like most people, I felt the only way I could engage in a good time was to drink. I had suppressed my own true personality so much that I felt I couldn't have fun without bringing out drunk Ryan. How screwed up is that!!!
Since I've been sober, I'm realizing that having to drink to have fun was just plain and simple garbage. It took a few weeks, but I can be just as engaged, and outgoing as I was when I was drinking. And guess what! Without the nasty side effects, embarrassing moments, nor wasted money I drank away.
Learning to have fun sober can be a challenge though. Just requires a little rewiring of the brain to bring back the true you! And I love the true me! And guess what??! So does everyone else!
-Ryan
Towards the end of my drinking, like most people, I felt the only way I could engage in a good time was to drink. I had suppressed my own true personality so much that I felt I couldn't have fun without bringing out drunk Ryan. How screwed up is that!!!
Since I've been sober, I'm realizing that having to drink to have fun was just plain and simple garbage. It took a few weeks, but I can be just as engaged, and outgoing as I was when I was drinking. And guess what! Without the nasty side effects, embarrassing moments, nor wasted money I drank away.
Learning to have fun sober can be a challenge though. Just requires a little rewiring of the brain to bring back the true you! And I love the true me! And guess what??! So does everyone else!
-Ryan
Matt M
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 490
I went many years where alcohol must have been constantly in my blood stream and it got to the point that I felt that without having it in me, I wouldn't be able to function during the day.
Altho I still get the heavy mood swings now, I find that I can still act and feel good when i've not drank.
Altho I still get the heavy mood swings now, I find that I can still act and feel good when i've not drank.
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