UniqueNewYork

Ok so I had a bad day at work, came out of there angry as a swarm of bees. I go to this meeting and they have moved it to the back of the building because some event is going on at the front. I go in and its this big dining hall type thing. Sound doesn't carry well. Only speakers I could hear well were people who talk louder than normal. Anyway I come into this meeting and its a big group I dunno probably 50+ people. Leader starts talking and it starts going around and to make a long story short it was like one aa person giving the floor to another aa person in their clique and this went on the whole meeting. A lot of crosstalk like someone would be talking and they would bring their friend into it talking about them. Anyway, only my second time going to this meeting and I just felt like some stranger. I've been to some good meetings and some bad meetings. I think I got what my chi was attuned to at that moment.

I have to wonder though can anyone else relate? I think I just need to go to more meetings. I traditionally am just not a cliques person. Kinda sucks this is a big meeting in this area and I'm seeing all the classic symptoms of crap I hate in meetings. People who are the "Superstar Guru" of AA (rarely have I met one of these that doesn't end up going back out after preaching and sucking people into this idea that they are the 2nd coming of drunk messiah or has some other dirty secret like they're a frequent 13th stepper). Yeah im in a pissy mood today

Squizz

Cliques in AA suck. I try to avoid groups that are too "cliquey" for me. It's annoying.

You're going to have those days though. Where everything just gets on your nerves. I'm sort of having one right now. I can't sleep for the life of me. (Been working midnights all week.)

It is now 430AM, and I have no idea what to do with myself. I'm used to getting off work at 6AM, so I'm not even tired. There's tough days in sobriety, no doubt.

CarolD

I'm thinking you transferred your work anger to the AA meeting?
Perhaps a smaller group would suit you better...

Please remember to watch out for halt
Prayer helps me keep in emotional balance.

Glad you did not drink over anything Uni....

CarolD

Squizz...
I've heard reading the BB often puts people to sleep....

Veritas1

Unique-

I have been at meetings too, where they tag eachother.

You could always give it a couple of more trys to see if it changes...could have just been today.

I would raise my hand also, and share what is going on.

Being upset...angry...looking for some experience, strength and hope, on anger, or whatever topic would be helpful to your recovery.

I think we have to ask for what we need sometimes...or it's just business as usual, and some groups may just be comfortable...

Squizz-

I find listening to Joe and Charlie Big Book study cd's on my dvd player helps me. I can listen and learn, then before I know it, I have fallen asleep.

I like Carol's suggestion of reading as well.

Sometimes I pray the serenity prayer over and over, and somehow I wake up in the morning thinking well, that worked!

Ollie909

Bad day at the office, followed up with a p/o'd night at the meeting.
Stong enough to go the club or the corner pub and lift the whole liquor counter up Cause I'm raising the bar... I feel better just listening to you vent..

Squizz

HAHA. I've heard that as well. I used a different type of BB though: Bodybuilding. It's helped, but I still have a ton of energy so I'm just going to go to a morning meeting. It can't hurt.

At least I don't feel so wired right now. Working out really takes the edge off, and sitting in a sauna sure helps as well. Get all those nasty toxins out of my system.

Squizz

Another thing I've not seen mentioned yet is inventory writing. Helps a lot.

I always neglect to do it though. But I think I should start soon. Seems like my life is on the line. I guess I just don't wanna' take a hard look at myself.

recycle

UNY, I land in ca-ca meetings from time to time. Sometimes I bring the ca-ca, sometimes others bring it to share. Smiling helps in either case.