cm79

I am a 4 year/minimum 12 pack of beer daily drinker. I decided that it was time to cut back. As with most things, I prefer to do it myself. I'm not interested in programs, and talking about feelings and all that goes with it. I just like to drink. Simple as that!! Well, for the past 2 nights, I've done ok without drinking. I haven't gone more than 4 straight days without drinking in about 4 years. The problem I am having is that I don't know what to do when I'm not drinking. I'm seriously bored. I don't feel like talking, exercising, or doing much else. I understand that my drinking is a bad habit, and that I am attempting to break my habit. Will this go away? How long does it normally take to feel somewhat "normal".

suki44883

It depends. If you aren't interested in working any program, going to a therapist, exercising or doing much of anything else, you're just making it harder on yourself. All those things can help you feel somewhat "normal" a lot faster than just sitting around white-knuckling it. It all depends on how badly you want recovery.

bellakeller

LOL. Already you are stuck talking about your feelings now that you quit alcohol - you say you're bored.

Do you have any interests or hobbies? My mother always told me that if I was bored to go do volunteer work. Are you willing to do something like that?

ste

It takes as long as it takes is all I can say. Reminds me of an article I read where the author quit for 30 days as an experiment. During the experiment, when he went out on his porch to sit and enjoy, he felt like he wasn't doing anything. After the experiment, when he went out on his porch to sit and enjoy, he was "doing something", he was having a drink.

Think you have to find something else you like instead of drinking. How long will that take?

doggonecarl

First, welcome to SR. A wealth of information here. I wanted to get the pleasantries aside because my next statement is going to come off as a little harsh. You call your drinking a "bad habit"? Chewing your fingernails is a bad habit, drinking 12 beers a night is alcohol dependence if not down right alcoholism. And the reason you don't feel "normal" is because your body has grown used to the alchohol and you drink to feel normal. What you are going through are probably withdrawals.

However, I could be wrong, as only you can make the determination that you are an alcoholic or not. However, how successful you are at not drinking...or unsuccessful, will tell you a lot about the role alcohol plays in your life.

You can even keep calling it a bad habit if you want, because that at least means you recognize that it isn't a "good" habit and quitting before it becomes a major problem is a wise choice.

Good luck.

Kjell

Welcome to SR-

I found, that like most thing in life, an open mind, some self honesty, and willingness to learn usually equals success.

"There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which can not fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance-that principle is contempt prior to investigation."
--HERBERT SPENCER

Kjell~

CarolD

Welcome to SR....

This has nothing to do with my drinking or recovery history
When I complained to my Dad that I was not happy

"Who the hell told you that was a given?
Get over yourself.
Go do something for someone else"

Another Dad zinger..."Only BORING people are bored'"


Try to relax...you are still in the initial de tox stage.
Wait a few more days....I'm betting you will see a difference

ChikkaB

Hrmmm.... doesn't sound like you feel you have a problem, or that you particularly want to stop drinking, or even that you need support in stopping drinking even though you admittedly haven't been able to put a sober week together in the last four years. You don't want any kind of recovery, or advice on staying sober, or the company of other alcoholics trying to stay clean.

You want ideas on how to be ok in your own skin while your life automagically rights itself without any help from you? Sorry, fresh out of those. Maybe you can call the library. Maybe you should just keep drinking, since it's not a problem for you and you don't really want help. Don't try to bullsh!t a bullsh!tter, son.

But if you change your mind, and you decide that you need some help to quit drinking, we'll still be here with advice and fellowship.

Thinkn

I read what everyone said, towards the 12 pack a day situation, and the boredom that sets in due to a lack of ideas to fill the hours that it previously took to drink (12) beers.

Power drinkers can sometimes drink (12) in a 3-4 hour period, some quicker, that is really not the issue. The issue I see, and this is my second day as well, is you are now allowed the freedom to do whatever you want!

Some ideas I have been kicking around: 1) you can drive your car to wherever you want without the fear of being pulled over and taken to jail, 2) you have saved your body from 1800 additional calories per day, 3) Your liver will not shiver when you approach the refrigerator any longer, 4) your health is improving already after only (2) days, 5) your mother will now respect you, 6) if your married, you might stay married, and 6) your kids will stop making fun of you behind your back, and now for the BIG one (unless your drinking swill), you will save $450.00 per week, or $2,025.00 per month, or $25,300 per year + tax. Now from an investment point of view, lets see what you could have done with the $97,200.00 over a (4) year period and you will begin to see the real impact of your decision to quit drinking!

Money is not everything, unless you can't earn it anymore so let's hope you health holds up or you won't be able to spend that much money on booze anyway.

If you invested the $25,300 in life insurance, your mortgage, your kids college education or if your not so inclined, you could use the money to see the world, visit every top tourist attraction in the world. So, your should be saying to yourself with your new found fortune. The World is Yours ~ Tony Montana!

Again, I am on my day 2 as well, and good luck to all of us other losers who are striving to pull our planes up, and make something with the rest of our sober lives!

So be proud of yourself, I am! 2 days and counting! Congrats!

Thinkn

SuperMega

I have had my stint of starts and stops over the past year. I found that the first few days after quitting I just quite didn't know what to do with myself in the evening (my normal time to drink). I almost went into an isolation mode.
Embrace it. Zone out- watch TV, read a book, play online games, surf the net. Just don't drink.
You will start to emerge from the sense of boredom once the alcoholism falls away and your personality is allowed to shine through again. I never realized how much more I could get done in a day or how many projects/hobbies of mine had been gathering dust in the corner.
Good luck.

UniqueNewYork

The problem you are having among other things is you don't make a connection that you want something out of life and that you need to do things to get there. As others said it doesn't sound like you think you have a problem. If you realized what you were giving up by spending your time drinking 12 beers a night, plus the financial value over the long run of this action, you'd probably be snapped into action or at least a more voracious attitude about quitting.

I had a conversation with someone about an acquaintance. She was dating a man 15 years older than her. He was a nutjob. He gave her gifts and demanded sex. When she said no the relationship went sour. I said you know what you want to make a difference in this girls life, get her to the gym. Get her to stop drinking soda and sweet tea which is probably whats keeping her overweight and unable to attract a decent guy. And me looking from the outside in I really and truly do see her situation as that simple. Its unfortunate. Even some people who quit drinking, they will never look at their life objectively and ask what they can change. There are some things we can't change. We can't change what family we drew in life. Then theres other things that can have a huge impact that we can change. It can be as simple as attitude or coming into work early and staying late. You are holding all the keys. No one can do it for you. You have to decide what you really want and what you're willing to do to get there.

OklaBH

As time goes by you wont be wondering what to do with yourself. After awhile your brain will be out of the fog and you will think "how did I drink like that before" For me its not such a bad habit as it is a disease and brain disorder. If you went to an AA meeting I promise you wont be bored. The room is full of people who liked to drink and didnt want to share their feelings. It will give you a new lease on life. Its definetly an hour well spent.

Linz

I really enjoyed reading everyones positive replies to this specific thread.
I was just two days sober on Monday of this very week! I had some of the same feelings, kind of worried that I would become bored without my crutch. I have no real "advice" for you here because it seems as though you're not too open to hearing any of it except for when it arises in your own head... but I will say that I have put in place something very positive where the negative drinking habit used to reside. Yoga.
I have accepted that yeah, I may become extremely bored in the times when drinking used to take time up, but at least I won't be falling down. (Metaphorically and physically lol)
Putting something positive in the space where drinking/negativity used to be can be a challenge, but I feel as if it is a challenge worth our while, because the positive will always kick the negatives arse in the end!

sleepie

Get a library card and use it. That's my suggestion. Nothing keeps me better company lately than a pile of books, and for me- drinking is not conducive to paying attention and retaining information. So it works well. Give it a try.

smacked

I honestly couldn't recover until I was willing to put as much effort into it as I was into my drinking/drugging.

Good luck!