mercurial me

Had an appointment with my doctor today to discuss blood test results and prep for an upcoming liver biopsy. I think the biggest lie I believed over my past alcoholic years was that things would never get too bad because I was only a beer drinker. This sounds stupid, but I always figured that the hardcore consequences of alcoholism (physical damage) would only hit people who abused hard liquor. I echoed this thought to my doc today who just looked at me with sympathy/pity and said "alcohol is alcohol."

I felt stupid being told that as I know how true that is now. Just amazing how many years my alcoholic brain/body convinced me that just being a beer drinker wouldn't lead me down this path. Because I always reached for that 6-pack of beer instead of that 40' of vodka/whiskey I thought I was a less self-destructive alcoholic. Very wrong & very stupid. I know I've been very wrong & very stupid, but having someone in an official capacity in the medical field point that out to me today really hit home.

Wishing everyone a sober weekend

JoeStrummer

I drank beer and whiskey from age 15 till 40, then switched to red wine 'cause it's "healthy". My liver seems to have survived (I'm 50 and recently quit), but alcohol re-wires the brain and leads to various kinds of bad behaviour and poor judgement, regardless of the flavour of your drink. I'm paying the price for that now, but glad to finally be sober.

Veritas1

Thank you. I needed to read this tonight. My mind was telling me today to just drink really good wine. I mean, my God, you see these cooking shows, and they are just drooling over it "paired with food", blah, blah, blah...really makes me nutty!

mtnmagic

Merc - Please don't beat yourself up. What is done is done and now you are working at getting healthy the best that you can. That ain't easy I know!

Like has been said before, you are an inspiration to me and also a caution of what can happen to anybody regardless of age with this horrible disease of alcoholism.

I always smile when I see you are still on here at SR, still staying sober, because my goodness...if you can do this, well I have NO EXCUSES and so can I, so thank you.

LaFemme

Lol merc...I think I did the same with wine but never thought about it until just now. I mean all adults drink wine with dinner don't they????ooops forgot to make the dinner to go with the wine but so what? Its not like I'm drinking the really bad wine? So I can't be that bad? I just really like the taste...lol. what about the wine in the morning....ummmm...well...that's just a little to get the day started....they did that in some ancient cultures didn't they? I'm sure I read that somewhere

Glad to see you here and good luck with the biopsy!

Xoxo, T

nvrbeentospain

Honestly, I'm so glad you're here sharing your story with us. This beer thinking thing -- lots of us have it. I never did much hard liquor drinking after college. Instead, I've been a beer and wine girl, but it's still been too much and still been a problem. But yeah, I thought the not drinking hard liquor meant something.

I'm guessing your doctor has heard things like that a million times. It's interesting that you pointed out how important it was to hear it from a medical official.

Good luck with the biopsy. Definitely let us know how it goes.

artsoul

haha LaFemme - you slay me!!

And merc..... let us know when you go in for your biopsy so we can send lots of prayers and good thoughts..... And I was a beer/wine believer, too..... used to tell myself I wouldn't get drunk as quickly (which might have been true but I probably just drank more of it to achieve the same "results").

Thanks for the post and hang in there!

thequest

Dealing with a big beer drinker where you can smell he was drinking before he admits to it. He says Im just more sensative to certain smells.

I always heard by the time alcohol hits your breath it's your body's way of trying to get rid excess other than things like urination. Also heard it could be diabetes as well but when you smell their breath only after they drink beer...

mercurial me

Thanks for that (and to everyone). Liver biopsy is on Tuesday. It's the second one in the past year. I believe they're doing this one to ensure the damage hasn't gotten any worse since my first one but my doc has kind of left me in the dark on what will happen after the results are in. It's not a horrible procedure but certainly not one I hope anyone on here has to go through.

clashman

Merc, Thanks so much for your posts. All of them have made an impact on me and my latest sobriety run. I too think the same and have had "the beer isn't bad for you mentality". I work at a medical center and in the mornings we have meetings to discuss patients. Many times I hear of patients with alcohol related conditions. Sometimes they don't make it through and pass away. I would hear the details and think no more beer, but would be at the store on the weekend buying and binging. I have an education and still can't see the craziness in what I am doing after I see and hear the outcome. Don't feel bad and think you are stupid. It's the disease tricking us. We must step outside ourselves and through the help of others we will expose the insanity. Thanks for stepping outside yourself and reaching out to help.

artsoul

Hey merc - how did things go Tuesday? I hope it wasn't too bad......

I'm thinking positive for your results.... keep the faith.........