bcboy

I don't start to many threads on here and try to post useful information when I can, so here goes.

My sober Journey now is at around 10 months. Since I put down all the booze / drugs I have had to face my life full on sober and I now know the reasons why I drank so much over the last decade.

I have been trying so hard to run my own company and in doing so had 0 time for myself in between my work and family. I have not had a single day off just for me in nearly a decade. I have not had a single day where I could just do what I wanted to do.

Not once...

Today is the start of big changes. I have notified everyone that I will be shutting down my company ASAP. I will be removing every single thing that has caused this crazy life that I have been living.

I am SO done trying to play this game...

It was driving me insane.

Only in sobriety am I able to see the insanity in chasing a dream when the dream was right under my feet all along.

ImReadyToQuit

I think you need to dig a little deeper in to why you drank. There are millions of people as busy as you and don't drink.

Although having ME time is important.. I think you should work on your life.. Perhaps it started as drinking to relax after a long day.. And progressed from there.

bcboy

I agree I do need to keep digging deeper but this is a start

when I say a decade and not a single day to myself I really mean that. no days off 24/7 7 days a week full on. No vacations nothing for over 10 years.

Few people are that busy...

SJTChiSox

I worked as a case worker in the foster care system. I dealt with abused children for 2 1/2 years. At first it caused me to cut back in my use. Then I began to use more and more often. I think my job was a major factor in my drinking.

Reset

I run a business too, and I used to think that drinking was "me" time. After quitting drinking I realized it's the opposite- it robs me of "me" time.

bcboy

Drunk or Sober I still never had "me" time. I was using booze to deal with the insane stress.

Now Sober I still have no "me" time and the insane stress on top.

Needing to change this will ensure I remain sober. I need "Me" time and I now know how important this is and will walk away from anything that stands in my way of having some freedom.

Dee74

I think balance is very important bcboy - it's something I still struggle with.

I went from a workaholic to a drunken layabout bum with nothing but me time...then back to a workaholic - I figure there's got to be a middle way LOL

best of luck in finding yours

D

Reset

Yeah I understand that.

One thing I never ever expected from quitting (and I'm not all that far along this road btw) was after a while the stress levels got a lot lower. Doesn't make sense, not being able to tune out the stress, but it's true. Maybe it makes me more able to see clearly what exactly merits stress and what exactly is just mundane b.s. that everyone goes through. I dunno.

Anyway I hope that you find some freedom (in all ways, including from the booze) and I hope that you can ditch the stress too. Good luck.

By the way, I'm not really a Buddhist or anything but this really helped me in the early stages. Reading your posts reminded me of it. Maybe it'll help you too. The Four Noble Truths

ElegantlyWasted

I think the key here is possibly finding a way to have and appreciate meaningful balance/diversity in one's life. For me I know it is easier said than done. That being said; nothing is ever perfect, and learning to "settle" for something that that approaches some sort of unreachable Platonic Ideal that many of us strive for is a monumental accomplishment in and of itself.

Kmber2010

Good for you BC. You have to be happy in life and if this is part of your journey then all the best

Have to enjoy this life ya know.