invisigoth

I really really want a drink right now. I haven't had one since Monday and I knew tonight would be really hard. I work a night shift so on the weekends I'm up all night wandering around the house. I've got no booze in the house right now but I know if I did I'd be drinking right now. I feel kind of shaky and my hearts beating a little fast and the thought of a drink makes my mouth water. This REALLY sucks.

sleepie

I'm sorry you're so uncomfortable. I hope it eases up for you tonight. Also congrats on your 4th (?) day!

Dee74

Hi invisgoth

posting and reading here helped me on innumerable occasions when I felt like that - you can get through this

D

invisigoth

I just keep telling myself that it will pass it will pass it will pass. I have nothing to drink right now anyhow so I'm just gonna have to deal with it.

Crow3000

Ah yes ... Isn't withdrawal lovely!? Here are a few tips you can try to relax yourself. First make sure you have eaten. When was the last time you had a meal? I would often forget this and it's a doozy, causes lots of problems. Take a hot bath while drinking a cold beverage just don't stay in too long or you will get exhausted instead of relaxed. Of course a good nights sleep is always best but let's be serious here, so early in recovery, there is a greater chance the magical sober fairy is going to come crashing through your window and cure you. Good luck

Antiderivative

It does pass. Once it does, you will feel better, especially over the fact that you didn't drink. It is just hell in the meantime. These moments occasionally happen. It is why alcoholism is hard to lick, so hard for some that it kills them.

I found that remembering my last drunk or where my drinking eventually led me to helpful in the situation that you are in right now. It reaffirmed that I was doing the correct thing by not pouring booze down my throat.

You may not realize this now, but you are making progress. You are doing excellent.

Kmber2010

Stay strong Invisi....it does pass. I wouldn't be here if I didn't hold tight and keep moving forward no matter how difficult it can be.

Posting and reading helped me tremendously as well.

AA4life

Keep going. It does get easier. I hope I never have to go through withdrawal again. It sucks so bad! If you haven't tried AA, then you might want to give it a shot now. AA isn't for everyone but you should try it and see if it helps you. You never know...

least

Yes, going thru the w/d and early sobriety itself really does suck. But it does get better. Five days sober should be done with most of the physical w/d but the mental crap used to do me in but good. Distract yourself. I used to have movie marathons to pass the time. I used to walk the dogs A LOT to pass the time and wear myself out, helped me sleep too, all that walking. You may not feel it but you are doing great. Just don't drink now cause that would put you back at the beginning and going thru w/d all over again... and you don't want to do that.

Eat a good meal too if you can. Filling your belly with good food can reduce the urge to drink if you're full. Drink lots of water and juice too. Just keep telling yourself that it WILL pass and it WILL get better, cause it will. The sugar in juice can help with the shaky feeling.

You never have to feel like this again if you just don't drink! I have faith in you.

barb dwyer

hoping you got a little sleep and arefeeling a bit better today.

Stang

I was outta work for a week going through withdrawal. As soon as I got back I went to a straight night shift. I would be up cleaning the house, throwing a nylabone for my dog, studying the academics of jujitsu...ect at 3:00 am while most people were asleep. Stay occupied and eat. If I get hungry I still get alcohol cravings.

LovesToTravel

I played lots of games in the arcade section of SR and read books until I could finally fall asleep. Those first days are the hardest and you've got a couple down...yeah...

tallcactus

HANG IN THERE YOU CAN DO THIS!
How are you doing now?
Be kind to yourself, keep busy, but most of all, go to the ER if things get out of hand.

invisigoth

[QUOTE=tallcactus;2823637]HANG IN THERE YOU CAN DO THIS!
How are you doing now?




My 5 day dry spell ended today.

LovesToTravel

I'm sorry to hear that. Dust yourself off and start again...you certainly can't beat this if you don't try....

invisigoth

I feel disgusted with myself at the moment. It's incredible how in that moment the little voice in my head can rationalize and legitimize just about anything. I don't know..it made perfect sense at the time. Does this make sense to anyone else or am I just nuts?

LovesToTravel

That voice is very powerful...lots of information around this site...don't give up...

Lando

Invisigoth, this makes perfect sense to me. I went 8 days without, finished most of the withdrawl "fun" and then I REALLY tied one on at day 9. I would still be drinking if it weren't for my friend and my sponsor. Because of them and my shear determination to never experience withdrawl or hurt anyone over my drinking again, I am going to get my 30 day chip tomorrow.
Keep at it. It really does get better. Sometimes you have to beat down the voices in your head with a really big mental stick. Anything is better than going through withdrawl again in my opinion.
As a few others recommended, make sure you eat and drink plenty of water and juice.

Antiderivative

It makes complete sense. I have been there, done that too many times that I lost count. I know what exactly you are going through.

You are dealing with addiction. In your case, specifically alcoholism. It is cunning, baffling, and powerful. We will rationalize, legitimize, minimize, romanticize, and lie to ourselves to that first drink. Then, sooner or later, it is down hill--towards the gutter.

You should be disgusted with yourself. It is disgusting how alcoholics drink. Eventually, our drinking leads us to eating s*#t sandwiches. The worst part is that we make those sandwiches ourselves. But it doesn't have to be that way. Some people can drink with impunity. Others can't. Guess what? We are the one's who can't and there is no way around it. If we drink, we lose. We might not lose overnight, but sooner or later we do.

However, don't beat yourself up over this. The fact that you are disgusted shows that you care about yourself and want to do the right thing. Use your disgust and focus it into resolve. Relapses happen to some of us, but learn from your relapse. What will you do differently next time that your skin begins to crawl? Unfortunately, it might happen again--its common in, especially in early recovery. So, be prepared and learn from your past mistakes.

You are doing great. You only had a minor setback. Do the right thing. Do not let this minor setback, turn into a 1,000 lbs gorilla on your back.

tooling

it took me about 5-6 attempts to quit before i did it now at 5 months. so i'd say it's normal. what you should try to do is avoid very high attempt numbers and failures since that might crush your spirits. but its never too late and never stop trying if you get caught up in it.