Curse

Hello again i been thinking after reading some posts here and now i know am addicted to vodka. why? because i need a few drinks every night i dont drink in the day time but when 11:00pm gets here i drink, do i like it yes i do, do i want to stop no i dont. I guess the thing that worrys me most is you can never drink again after you quit. I got really not much in my life no jobs around here, nowhere to go, life is just life i try my best but nothing ever works out right. What am trying to say is there other things i need to sort out in my life or am i just kidding myself.

Sorry for the rant if anyone can see what am trying to say any advise would be welcomed.

Dee74

Hi Curse

Welcome.

I spent years being worried but not wanting to quit - even tho I often sick miserable and poor, drinking was my life. It was a constant. It was a crappy life but it was mine.

Eventually tho I had to drink more and more to get the same effect. More and more bad things happened to me as a result of drinking, and I also got sicker and sicker.

I drank all day everyday, and I nearly died.

I had no choice but to find a new way to live - and I'm glad I did.
I got my self respect back, and I found happiness and usefulness again.
I'm not a slave to alcohol anymore.

If you ever want to give sobriety a go, you'll find a lot of support here.

D

TheBatman

Alot of people can actually be in a phaze. Like they lose their job they go through a 6 month drinking spree and they stop. Alot of people think hey ive only just started drinking im only 20 and they live with the fact that theyve only just started and not look at the big picture. But the big picture is you sir are tetering on a very tight rope. What that means is that you may not be a alcoholic, but you sure are on the road to being one. I would advise you to do some soul searching, find something else in your life thats good because drinking to get plastered isnt the way to go.

Now if you feel youre up to just drink every now and again then thats not a problem, but you really shouldnt drink every night or get plastered. How do i knwo this?
Because i was 21 once (though im 24 now). I used to think whats some vodka gonna do to me and ive only just started drinking, but thats the recipe for disaster.

Soon your health will get lower, youll be more dependent on alcohol to the point to where its one of the main things in your life. You may have a job, wife, kid, but alcohol will be an importance also and thats not good. I wish you luck

Dime

The ugly part of alcoholism is that it is a progressive disease and once an alcoholic there is no return to social drinking. I refused to believe this for years and continuously tried to reduce and control my drinking. The end result was that my drinking always got worse. They say alcoholism is like a down elevator and you can get off any time when you accept help. Looking back at my personal experience my recovery would have been so much easier if I had accepted help earlier. Consequences can build exponentially.

TheBatman

You hit it right on the nail Dime. There is no return to Social Drinking once you become an Alcoholic. I sometimes think how anyone can not be an alcoholic. Like how can you just put it down and not feel like doing it at all until maybe 3 weeks later, like how can you just do something so fun once every blue moon. But thats apart of being alcoholic, we take joy in it much more so then others.

Curse

So what do you replace that "fun" with?

TheBatman

As someone who is still struggling with my alcohol addiction i think the other sr members may have better input but i can certainly try. You see the "fun" you get out of drinking is the "fun" you dont get out of life honestly that the real thing i think is what it is.

When you drink (at least when i do) you go into a fantasy world, u can be anything and anyone you want, everything you do is better and your stress is temporarily reileved, until you wake up with a hang over and realize your problems havent gone anywhere so you drink some more. But i honestly think that if you are a truly happy person, then binge drinking shouldnt be something you do all the time. (and im not talking having a family etc etc)

Because even then you still may not be happy, i'm talking about being happy within yourself as a person, because ill admit, i'm not the happiest person, haven't been for years (well before i even started drinking i wasn't happy so drinking didn't do it for me imo)about myself or anything really. So you see when i eventually stop drinking altogether nothing will change for me imo. Ill still be the lost unhappy person i was before i first drunk. ( i honestly haven't been happy since i was maybe 11 years old)

Curse

I think your right i drink to escape from the real world. so unless i try and make my Real world better i always be in this trap.

johndelko408

Well alcoholism is an addiction, just an addiction to alcohol. No one can tell you that you're an alcoholic, well they can but only you can decide whether or not you're in fact an alcoholic. There are three symptoms of an alcoholic, it is said that alcoholism is a threefold disease. A disease of the mind, body and spirit.

1) the mental obsession that leads to the first drink. - mind
2) the allergy or physical craving that is triggered after the first drink to have more. - body
3) the spiritual malady which is more or less IMO is the restlessness of the soul. There are a number of symptoms of the spiritual malady. Below are some which are found throughout the text of the book of Alcoholics Anonymous (Big Book) and some that aren't:

1) being restless, irritable, and discontented (page xxvi),
2) having trouble with personal relationships,
3) not being able to control our emotional natures,
4) being a prey to (or suffering from) misery and depression,
5) not being able to make a living (or a happy and successful
life),
6) having feelings of uselessness,
7) being full of fear,
8) unhappiness,
9) inability to be of real help to other people (page 52),
10) being like "the actor who wants to run the whole show" (pages 60-61),
11) being "driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity" (page 62),
12) self-will run riot (page 62),
13) leading a double life (page 73),
14) living like a tornado running through the lives of
others (page 82)
15) exhibiting selfish and inconsiderate habits.

AmericanGirl

Hi Curse,

There are all types of addicts and alcoholics and alcohol abusers who would be best off quitting. For a long time, I thought because I didn't fit the idea I had of "an alcoholic" I wasn't one. I now see the disease much differently, in shades of gray and with various levels of consequence. I might have had fewer consequences than others, and I may have only drank in the evenings, but that doesn't change that for me the best decision was to quit entirely.

This was an overwhelming thought for me too, at first. What helped for me was to imagine it day by day and not the overwhelming "never again." Now that I'm almost 8 months in, it's a LOT easier to live sober and to imagine the future sober. Try not to overwhelm yourself with the long term . . focus on the present now.

As far as enjoying life goes, and replacing the "fun," try out new or old hobbies and be patient with yourself, and consider seeing a therapist or doc if in time you are still struggling with enjoying life in time.

TheBatman

Yes i completely agree with American girl, do some old hobbies and old things that used to make you happy. Maybe call up an old friend and hang out like the good old days, maybe that will stir your desire to choose not to drink. I only wish i had old hobbies or things that really made me happy as i really was never happy through middle school, high school, college etc. I always lived but ehh.... There have been some times where im happy,

But its only temporary im really not happy as a person, and thats personal to me so i wont go into that, but anyway i really do wish you luck. As stated you may not be a alcoholic, but you are sure on your way to being one so watch it. I dont want to see you here a year from now with your alcohol obsession grown :P.

CarolD

What are your plans for future employment?
Why not consider going to a tech school or college.?

You might also consider re locating to an area with jobs
that suit your talents.

There is no point in wasteing time when you could
improve your situation. Sitting home and doing little is
simply sapping energy...IMO

About sleeping problems...get busy and they may pass
because you are truly tired.

Please see if this info helps you
Insomnia? 42 Simple Tips to Help You Get to Sleep - Insomnia treatment, cures

BTW....passing out from alcohol is not a healthy restful sleep.


All my best....hope you find a more fulfilling life...