lb6493

Have any of you been to rehab, inpatient and left after 28 days and had the need to drink because now you were by yourself and no one was looking over your shoulder?

Mark75

Well yea, that's always a tough transition. I remember subconsciously looking for a bar on the way home... I just had to laugh at myself.... What kind of aftercare plan do you have?

yeahgr8

Yes...i was advised to get to AA, get a sponsor and work the steps immediately...i went to a few meetings, sat drinking coffees with my old drinking buddies telling them how i was sober now and did not get a sponsor...3 weeks later i was drunk...6 weeks after that i was in AA willing to do anything...i was told over and over again in rehab that it was just the start and the real work started when i left but i knew best i guess;-)

lb6493

It's my fiance. He left 1 week ago to rehab and is due to return 1/3/11. I was just wondering what someone that goes through the process thinks. He is not allowed to speak with anyone until 1 day next week.

Impurrfect

(((Lb))) - you may want to check out the Friends & Family (F&F) forums. I'm both an RA (recovering addict) and a recovering codependent who had THREE XABF's (ex addict/alcoholic bf's).

I can tell you that trying to figure out what/why he is thinking is futile. You just can't do that unless you are an A. I didn't become an A until after I'd spent 20+ years with an alcoholic, and I never could "get" why he did what he did. Now I know. It's a bad way to find out.

While he's in rehab, it would be a good time to focus on YOU. We often have to work our own recovery..get healthy for us, decide what we will and won't tolerate, set boundaries. An A will do what they will. Rehab is just a first step in a long road to recovery. He has to want it, more than anything in his life. WE have to learn how to take care of us.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

least

I went to rehab three times... and drank after each one... I just wasn't ready to stop drinking yet. When I was finally ready to stop, I didn't need rehab to 'make' me stop.

Rehab gets you started on the sober life and gives you tools and knowledge to keep you sober, but you have to want to stay sober or the tools and knowledge are worthless.

glitter

A close sober friend of mine who I met in outpatient treatment went to a 28 day inpatient treatment center 4 months prior to checking herself in to the program we went through together.

The problem with that 28 day program for her was that there was zero follow-up. Of course they encouraged her to get a sponsor and go to meetings. She didn't. She drank thinking she was well enough to control it, but it just got worse. She realized during the day and outpatient program that we were in that the 28 day program lacked in many areas, especially recovery education and the importance of continuing care, relapse prevention and family groups.

28 days is just not long enough.

Dime

Rehab is wonderful and gets you going but it is only the beginning of the recovery. Most of us spent years of abusive drinking/using and you just can't reverse that in 28 days. Having a plan and a recovery program before you get out improves you chances of success dramatically. For me personally I never would have made it without a support group.

stugotz

He is not alone anymore.

lb6493

Thank you everyone for your advice.

rws177

If you have to have someone looking over your shoulder you will fail.

I went to rehab for 14days, stayed sober for 3 months and relapsed for three days. The reason I drank was because I thought I was "cured" and could have just one. When I could not I realized that I could never drink like a normal person and that was over a year ago. The person has to want it for them self. At any point I can go and buy some liquor and relapse within minutes, basically no one can or should baby sit me for the rest of life….