Jupiter

It has been dawning on me that part of the reason that I have abused alcohol is that it was a strong coping mechanism for the anxiety and stresses of life. It is such a quick, easy, and powerful "fix" for a problem that should be addressed in a different way.

The problem is, alcohol has decimated my coping skills, having left me to run to the bar for every change in life, both good and bad. It has diminished my ability to cope with day to day life.

I find that on Day 4 of my quit regimen, the anxiety really starts to manifest itself. I know, from prior quit attempts that (had) actually been semi-successful that this anxiety will dissipate.

But I wanted to bring to attention the interesting intersection of alcoholism and anxiety problems. It is said that a large portion of alcoholics have anxiety disorders, and vice versa. However, the correlation is far from one.

With that said, it is a difficult dilemma to separate the two - a chicken and egg scenario.

I wonder if others have experienced the same. I am not referring to the anxiety that accompanies withdrawal - this is a given, and must be dealt with regardless of the person. I am rather referring to the innate anxiety that people have been afflicted with since childhood and for which some have resorted to drink as a means of mitigating.

If people had an underlying anxiety problem, does sobering up (eventually) allieviate it? Can one go re-learn how to cope and deal with life and one's emotions?

DukeBurger

Anxiety is the main reason I started drinking in any possible social situation...

Dee74

I definitely had social anxiety issues that I self medicated with alcohol.

I had to learn to deal with all of that sober - as well as all the other things I'd 'drink for' - tumultous feelings, boredom, bad news, good news, being sad, being happy....

I'd be lying if I said I was always comfortable in social situations, but I have made great strides - and I think part of that is I've accepted I am kinda shy - and I'm ok with that...I don't have to be anyone or anything I'm not.

The most important thing is I never drink over it anymore
D

TwoJacks

The two go hand and hand with me. I drank to alleviate anxiety, then the drinking caused more anxiety. I was on a spinning wheel. Now that I am sober I still have anxiety but I cope with it.

mercurial me

Alcohol always worked well for my social anxiety/general day to day anxiety for many years. Now that my organs are falling apart after years of using alcohol as a coping mechanism I wish I had found a better way to deal. I mortgaged my life expectancy using alcohol to alleviate anxiety. It gets you in the end

LawMama

I too had a lot of anxiety that I covered up with alcohol....I have 4 months sober and the anxiety is under control with the help of the 12 steps. For me, the anxiety would have taken over by now if I didn't have new coping skills to use. I also take anti-depressants that help with anxiety (obligatory disclaimer: I am not giving medical advice, just my personal experience).

So yes I do see the connection .... and it does get better!

Forwards

Yes, it's an interesting one. From childhood I was always a 'worrier'. What ever the situation I would find the next thing to worry about then fixate on it. Not only was I shy, I always thought myself an outsider. My drinking through uni was certianly driven by this.

LawMama: Interesting that working the 12 steps is helping you. Could you maybe elaborate a bit on this please?

Jamison

I have GAD and Panic Disorder w/Agoraphobia. I do believe I had the anxiety disorders first as I remember having mini panic attacks as a young child.

It doesn't matter to me though, I need to be sober to recover from my anxiety disorders.

I, like many alcoholics, tried to stay sober on my own. During this one period of sobriety I had become Agoraphobic - afraid to even go to the second floor of my home. I overcame a lot of my agoraphobia during this "sober" time. Am able to drive, shop etc.

I relapsed...but realized I needed AA. Have heard others share in meetings how they overcame their anxiety/depression problems after working the 12 steps.

I am only nearing 70 days. I can say that the anxiety hasn't gotten worse and I haven't experienced any panic attacks. I do have a clearer head with which to use the coping skills I have learned.

LaFemme

Like Dee I drank to deal with the anxiety my shyness came with...and it did make navigating social scenes eassoer (although not necessarily better...after all who needs to navigate a kegger?). Problem was the alcohol eventually caused anxiety in every other area o my life.

I am 4+ months sober and the anxiety has largely dissipated ...I have gone to a number of social events and yes I was shy but I realized I was ok with that because did I really want to fit in with a bunch of people drinking?

As for learning new coping mechanisms for life...yeah we got to learn them. I am working with a wonderful life coach and I have to say its wonderful. I am able to visit my family for the holidays (massive trigger) and feel calm, strong in my sobriety and even happy to see them despite all the booze in the house. In the past a visit like this would have sent me into a alcoholic panic. So we can change and learn how to deal with life...it is so much easier without the booze:-)

LaFemme

Ummmm....what's GAD?

MattM316

Yes it's certainly anxiety with me and pretty much always has been.
I worry about everything, even things that didn't need to be worried about. It was like I was creating these bad situations in my head and worrying about them, so basically just worrying about things that hadn't happened and were not likely to happen.

My ex lived in London and I live about 200 miles away so we only saw each other a few days a month, but I used to constantly worry about what she was up to etc.
And I also think that drinking before going out or going into any kind of social situation just made it a whole lot easier. And it did, I felt alot more comfortable and less shy and awkward, and generally I was able to control it very well, ie nobody could tell I had been drinking earlier.

BullDog777

Generalized anxiety disorder

BullDog777

i lived in a rough neighborhood as a kid and was always concerned about gangs, but other than that, i didn't worry too much.

my parents might say i was a worry some person, but under the circumstances, i'm not sure if i had a normal reaction to all the violence or not.

i started drinking because of post traumatic stress syndrome which made a plethora of anxiety issues that have largely disappeared after being sober for awhile so maybe i had some minor anxiety, but not much.

i think when i really started having anxiety issues was after i was already a heavy drinker and i was starting to depend on it emotionally.

after being sober for awhile, those things that ate at me when i was out there killing myself with booze are either things i can change or things i cannot. i really try to not worry about the things i cannot change.

shaun00

I was diagnosed with clinical depression at a young age..
Whether its a hereditary issue im unsure, but i would say im not the only one in my family.

Along with that depression....in fact running alongside, is a mild anxiety disorder.
i say mild.....it bubbled under the surface most of my life with occasional episodes of unable to function...feelings of impending doom....finger nails bitten to the quick....sweating....trembling.....at its worse..unable to cross the road.

Medication was strong....back in the early 80s....in fact banned in this country now.
And then the booze........the solution........the ultimate solution.
like air to a drowning man......total relief.

At some point in my drinking......and by this time id ditched the pills, drinking went beyond medicating myself..
This is the point where i believe heavy drinking became alcoholism.

Alcoholism ....depression....anxiety disorders are seperate illnesses although booze can be a solution and is.....a perfect solution to all three.

In early recovery i made a decision.........against doctors advice to try live my life without medication for ANY disorder i was diagnosed for.

I havent taken meds for as long as ive been sober......and that would be ten years......BUT BEAR IN MIND IM NOT RECOMMENDING ANY ONE DOES THIS.
and the fact my anxiety and depression was "on the whole"...mild.

I used and still do on occasions......a trained therapist with regards to depression and linked anxiety.....i eat well...... exercise well...and have a strong faith.

I used and still do, close adherence to the 12 steps laid out in the book alcoholics anonymous..and attempt to live my life based in spritual principles.
i attend AA and try to carry a message of hope to people that still suffer from active alcoholism..

My finding for both are this.

Over the time without meds, episodes have lessened greatly..BUT it wasnt easy......but on the whole my mental health has improved to very occasional mild depressive episodes/anxiety episodes.
In fact it has become seasonal......winter being uncomfortable at times....but brief.

And the booze has ceased to be a problem any longer........the problem has gone...
I work with newcomers and stay closely connected to god.....
i have recovered and remain happy and contented without booze.

jamdls

My anxiety/depression also led to my drinking, I was always shy and quiet and alcohol got me "out of my shell" of course eventually the alcohol deepened my depression and worsened the anxiety. Since I recovered from the need/desire for alcohol (over 3 yrs) my depression has definetly lifted and I haven't had a need for anti-depressants for about 2 yrs I think, the anxiety has also lifted in general but is still present in social situations. I'm still a very quiet person and I prefer being alone so it just seems normal to me that I have anxiety in social situations, that's just the way I am and I don't see it as something "wrong" with me so I see no need to change.

LawMama

Forward asked how the 12 steps have helped me deal with anxiety. Well, number one, is AA helped me to believe in a higher power again (I had become borderline atheist in my adult years). Being able to trust that I am not in control, and the one who is knows far more than I do, helps me be able to accept things as they are instead of constantly worrying about how I am going to change things to suit my needs. Also, trusting in a HP helps me realize that I am a valuable person and that doesn't change if people don't like me or if I don't say the perfect things in every situation, which was a source of anxiety for me. The idea of taking one day at a time and doing the next right thing has really helped me stay in the now which calms my anxiety when I start to worry about the future or the past, which I did (and do).

Then working through the steps (none done yet of course! Never will be!), I take take an inventory of things that cause me anger and fear and why those things cause anger and fear. Do they threaten my pride? My financial stability? My emotional security? Then I'm able to look at what my mistakes were that led to the anger and fear that I carry around. It has been the only way I've ever been able to move on from childhood issues and other past issues that were causing me anxiety, fear, and stress. And this is coming from someone who was in therapy for years and has a BS in psychology! II am still shocked that it works as well as it does.

The 12 steps also helped me because the Big Book of AA is armed with a lot of tools and prayers I can use to calm my mind in stressful situations that cause me anxiety. At first I thought of these tools as mantras and not prayers because I didn't want to deal with the "God thing," but either way having something calming to repeat has helped a lot (especially in way early sobriety). In the first couple months I would walk around literally thinking, "grant me the serenity, serenity, serenity, serenity" just so I wouldn't think about a drink!!!

Another way the steps and AA has helped me is I have met like-minded people who struggle with the same anxiety I have, and so I don't feel as alone which makes facing each day easier.

Which this forum does as well!

Hope everyone has a wonderful day today.

AmericanGirl

Yes, I am an anxious person, both learned and by nature, I suspect. I especially worry about social situations--pre, during, and after--just like my mother and grandmother did. Drinking was absolutely a way for me to try to manage this, especially "during," but it only ignored the problem and made things worse.

Now that I'm no longer drinking, I am still anxious but it's not as bad, and I'm trying to learn healthier ways to deal with my anxiety by breathing, doing meditative practices, and reminding myself to put things in perspective vis-a-vis how little my embarrassments matter to others even if they seem really embarrassing to me (if at all! I'm pretty sure 90% is in my head only). Basically, I am working against self-consciousness for a variety of reasons. I also like what people on this board have said about self-acceptance of their shyness . . .

soidog

Nice topic. For me, alcohol was also a quick fix for anxiety over work, as well as personal things. But the alcoholism also created more anxiety for me. IE the constant shame, fear of being "caught" as an alcoholic, and all the stress caused by poor performance at work generally.

As previously mentioned, sobriety forces us to become complete people and develop those coping skills to deal effectively with stress and anxieties. I think its a challenge a lot of us have to work on within those few months, maybe even few years, after we stop drinking. Its also I think one of the big reasons why relapse can occur. Don't get me wrong here - physically stopping the act of drinking is a HUGE step, but by no means does it mean that we are out of the woods.

gr8ful42day

I can relate to so many of your posts!

Anxiety is what started me drinking and led to my ultimate demise. I have almost 2 months and I still have anxiety, but not as bad as it was with alcohol. I think, for me, it made the anxiety worse when drinking..as mentioned in post before this one.

Thanks to all for sharing.

chanel1125

I think initially the anxiety is what started my drinking. After a while it blossomed into a whole other dimension of coping and controlling certain things in my life. Like a previous poster said, it created a whole new form of anxiety with the lying,hiding,secrets etc... so in reality it obviously was no fix.