"alcoholic",a very bad word
Sober member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: New Haven,CT
Posts: 109
"alcoholic",a very bad word
ignore my laziness for proper grammar posting,thank you 
that word,alcoholic,really bothers me,just too broad spectrum,its like calling allergies the flu. those who know me here do agree i am an alcoholic and i wont disagree.
i talked to my 21 year old college son today,i asked him to have a man2man with me,he agreed,the kid(guy) made so much sense,he explained that my everyday drinking beer has affected everyone in my life and thats why i am having hard time with in-laws and whole family circle. he said he dont see me as alcoholic but a problem drinker who passed on my many chances of restarting peoples opinions of me.
see,around here once deemed an alcoholic you are finished with a great number of people in your life,scary but i am already at that point!
when i hear someone gossip about somebody and call them alcoholic,i sometimes wonder because thay drink responsibly in my eyes,and i am a 12 pack daily drinker.
any thoughts?
btw,im stopping drinking today,will it last? who knows
that word,alcoholic,really bothers me,just too broad spectrum,its like calling allergies the flu. those who know me here do agree i am an alcoholic and i wont disagree.
i talked to my 21 year old college son today,i asked him to have a man2man with me,he agreed,the kid(guy) made so much sense,he explained that my everyday drinking beer has affected everyone in my life and thats why i am having hard time with in-laws and whole family circle. he said he dont see me as alcoholic but a problem drinker who passed on my many chances of restarting peoples opinions of me.
see,around here once deemed an alcoholic you are finished with a great number of people in your life,scary but i am already at that point!
when i hear someone gossip about somebody and call them alcoholic,i sometimes wonder because thay drink responsibly in my eyes,and i am a 12 pack daily drinker.
any thoughts?
btw,im stopping drinking today,will it last? who knows
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
I know I'm an alcoholic. Once I admitted and accepted that fact, my whole world changed. I'm no longer a victim. I can't claim ignorance or denial. I had to fess up to what my responsabilities would be now that I cannot drink safely ever again, regardless of what anyone else wants to call me.
What used to be acceptable behavior on my best drinking days, now is unacceptable on my worst sober days.
I'm a recovering alcoholic and I'm starting to become a grateful one.
What used to be acceptable behavior on my best drinking days, now is unacceptable on my worst sober days.
I'm a recovering alcoholic and I'm starting to become a grateful one.
Sober member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: New Haven,CT
Posts: 109
its the opinions of others that makes the word bad,its almost like 'non-alcoholics' thrive on just knowing an 'alcohoic'!
its the same with anti-depressants which are now like aspirin,you are on anti-depressant you suck! and for many its a lifeSAVER!
can i post "people suck!"?
its the same with anti-depressants which are now like aspirin,you are on anti-depressant you suck! and for many its a lifeSAVER!
can i post "people suck!"?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6,947
It doesn't matter what your 21 year old son thinks... what do you think? I remember when I was 21 and my newly divorced father went to AA, I was like, WTF...
I haven't asked my 22 yo son what he thinks... doesn't matter... we do a lot of cool stuff together... hunt, fish, hike, ski... if he wants a beer, he has one, I like diet coke... we have a great time. We don't talk about alcoholism, I am recovered.
Stop drinking, if your life gets harder, if you become restless, irritable and discontent, if you can't stop completely.... well, maybe you are alcoholic, but it's not for me to say...
Keep posting!
I haven't asked my 22 yo son what he thinks... doesn't matter... we do a lot of cool stuff together... hunt, fish, hike, ski... if he wants a beer, he has one, I like diet coke... we have a great time. We don't talk about alcoholism, I am recovered.
Stop drinking, if your life gets harder, if you become restless, irritable and discontent, if you can't stop completely.... well, maybe you are alcoholic, but it's not for me to say...
Keep posting!
Sober member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: New Haven,CT
Posts: 109
Originally Posted by Dee74 
It's good to see you back here
I think it's probably more important that we do something about our problem than name it.
I hope this time can be you time - whats your support, Patrick?
D
I think it's probably more important that we do something about our problem than name it.
I hope this time can be you time - whats your support, Patrick?
D
none
Sober member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: New Haven,CT
Posts: 109
wow,i forgot how friendly this place was 
i dont have much of a choice now,its quit drinking now or have my whole entire life change(wife of 21 years,boys 21&14).
NEVER say you are proud of me tho if i go extended time without,seems to jinx me.
i dont have much of a choice now,its quit drinking now or have my whole entire life change(wife of 21 years,boys 21&14).
NEVER say you are proud of me tho if i go extended time without,seems to jinx me.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,432
Sorry to hear that you have no support Patrick.
I didn't have any support from family or friends either, but I went looking for it and I found it.
If ever you're interested there's a sticky post in this forum on recovery programmes - you may have seen it before, but there's a few options in there...
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
Good luck
D
I didn't have any support from family or friends either, but I went looking for it and I found it.
If ever you're interested there's a sticky post in this forum on recovery programmes - you may have seen it before, but there's a few options in there...
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
Good luck
D
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
Patrick-
I don't even know where you live but there are already a bunch of folks, just like you, who are either trying to get sober or are already sober and sharing how they did it.
...and guess what - it's free of charge.
Seems like a no brainer to me if you honestly want to get and stay sober.
I don't even know where you live but there are already a bunch of folks, just like you, who are either trying to get sober or are already sober and sharing how they did it.
...and guess what - it's free of charge.
Seems like a no brainer to me if you honestly want to get and stay sober.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Chicago Area
Posts: 47
The term alcoholic is a very dirty word in todays world. Whenever I see a new doctor for whatever issue I will never, never tell them I'm a alcoholic and drug addict. Why? Because the you do you are treated differently. Many doctors and hospitals do not consider addiction a disease. This has been my extensive experience.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 157
Originally Posted by anaconda22
The term alcoholic is a very dirty word in todays world. Whenever I see a new doctor for whatever issue I will never, never tell them I'm a alcoholic and drug addict. Why? Because the you do you are treated differently. Many doctors and hospitals do not consider addiction a disease. This has been my extensive experience.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,776
If I could turn back time....
You can't turn back time Patrick, but you can make a better future. Stop making excuses about your drinking, lack of support, whatever. If you really want to stop, get help and stop. Whether it's AA or another program or counseling doesn't matter, what matters is how much effort you put into it. If you do no work, you get no results.
Dismember
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: The Mitten, USA
Posts: 1,641
I use it knowing that the word evokes a lot of stereotypes and emotions. I haven't really thought about it but I suppose it's because once I take the step off throwing it all out there as directly as possible it makes the other person less uncomfortable, there's less they have to worry about saying in turn.
i've done my almost
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Atlanta, GA
Posts: 1,934
Originally Posted by anaconda22
The term alcoholic is a very dirty word in todays world. Whenever I see a new doctor for whatever issue I will never, never tell them I'm a alcoholic and drug addict. Why? Because the you do you are treated differently. Many doctors and hospitals do not consider addiction a disease. This has been my extensive experience.
Could it be our thinking is different? I think I've heard you mention you've been doctor shopping for valium? I'm sorry in advance if I'm wrong.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Patrick... you can say what you like but people don't suck. My opinion of them does sometimes.....but that's a problem I have with judgment - it has nothing to do with whether they really suck or not.
I've learned, in recovery, to try to quit judging people and yanno, the less I judge "them" the nicer and better "they" seem to get. Gee....I wonder where the problem was rooted. I've also learned that the less power I give my resentments (as in thinking ppl suck, for example) the happier I feel... and nobody had to change but me.
Good luck to you.
I've learned, in recovery, to try to quit judging people and yanno, the less I judge "them" the nicer and better "they" seem to get. Gee....I wonder where the problem was rooted.
I've also learned that the less power I give my resentments (as in thinking ppl suck, for example) the happier I feel... and nobody had to change but me. Good luck to you.
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