suki44883

I have been prescribed benzos for years & coming off of them in this stressful time of my life is out of the question. I need the pills because my hangovers are so bad.

If you stopped drinking, you wouldn't have hangovers. And no, you don't need them for hangovers anyway. All these excuses why you can't stop doing this or that is just that...a bunch of excuses and they don't hold water. We have been where you are so you can't BS us. It's time to get honest with yourself.

Stang

DITTO!!!

They are suppose to stop serving you but the typical drunk ass will then throw a fit, and possibly start a fight...make a scene if nothing else. I have no sympathy for the alcohol industry. I think they are vultures but at the end of the day guess who pours it down our throats.

r7av7en7

I agree that it almost seems like you're not truly ready to quit. I went through the same thing, I used everything I could as a crutch to justify drinking "Just one more time" and I always wound back up at square one.

You have to get to a point where you are done, no more, throw in the towel and start your new life. If you can get back to the bar you can get to the meeting. Also as far as the pills, you don't need one to stop the other, and that is only going to make matters worse in the long run. We are all here to help but like Suki said, you have to get honest with yourself first.

ChangeIsGood123

I agree not a good idea to go to the bar. I had to steer clear early on and still to this day. And I lost what I thought were a lot of friends not going and hanging out at the bar. Of course, that was the only place I ever saw them so what kind of friends are those really? But I had to do it because it was right for me. Now I can go and hang out, eat at a bar etc but not as a regular thing.

julez

Ana, I told you last time I posted...Joe the bartender will understand if you don't go back.
And another thing... If you want to be banned, or hell, if you want to say hi to Joe...
CALL THE BAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You can't blame Joe in this situation. You can't believe everything you read (the sign about serving responsibly)
Theres a wonderful gal that attends the meetings I go o, and she rides her bike to every one. No one would dream of thinking she looks silly. We admire her dedication to her sobriety.
Time to take a hard look at yourself hon.

artsoul

I'm sorry to hear this, because it's sad. Do you think there is anything that would help you get motivated to stay sober?

Kjell

Hi Ana-

I'm glad you're posting here and also that you decided to not go back to the bar. I had to change my people, places, and things. You might have to do the same.

More importantly, I had to change who I was or the same me would drink again. Maybe this is true with you too?

Looking forward to reading your posts and I hope you're able to stop drinking. If you're like me, the only chance I have at life is in sobriety. I had to go to any lengths and realize I needed people who know how to get and live sober to do my thinking for me in the beginning. I was in my own way - holy moly! (but true)

It was tough on the old ego for sure, but it worked. I believe it'll work for you too, whatever way you decide to go in your sobriety.

See ya around SR and let's get sober!

anaconda22

Thanks KJ. I am a chronic relapser so I doubt I have the ability to stay sober. I've been to treatment more than 10 times!

Sudz No More

Ana, it's looking like you'll make it the day without drinking. Keep this day in your thoughts the next you time you plan on letting yourself down. You can and will find the resolve if you really want to.

least

I was a chronic relapser but I know I have the ability to stay sober. And I was only in treatment three times.

firestorm090

Funny thing about bars, every time I go in one, that darn bartender gets me drunk, at my request, lol.

Another funny thing, each time I've asked for a cola, well, I got one of those too.

If I go into a bar, there's no damn way I'm leaving sober, just doesn't make sense to me. So if I'm there, there's only one reason.

Zebra1275

I've heard it said many times in AA meetings, "If you hang around a barbershop long enough you're going to get a haircut."

suki44883

Treatment is useless unless we have the determination and desire to do whatever it takes to not drink. Going into a bar to see a friend is not doing whatever it takes to not drink. Recovery is a process that we have to nurture and protect every day. It will get easier as time goes by, but the first six months to a year, it is very volatile. Our resolve gets weak and we have to bolster it however we can. We have to force ourselves to get past the rough spots of early sobriety. It isn't for the faint of heart and it isn't for those who aren't ready. When you are truly ready, you will know. You will be so fed up with drinking that you will be ready to go through hell fire and still not pick up a drink. Until you have reached that point (sometimes called your bottom) you will only play around with recovery, and when the going gets tough, you will succumb to the temptations. Sorry to be so blunt, but that's just the way it is.

barb dwyer

Wow.

I hope you will print this thread
and put it someplace you can go back and read it

if you decide to get sober.

I tended bar for years.
It's my JOB to take you money.
It's my JOB to be nice to you.
And it's my JOB to make sure the BAR makes money.

has nothing - NOTHING to do with friendship.

But you're not in a place to see anything I could say right now.

Now you're gonna 'work the docs' and find on that will give you drugs.

I've been around a long time, hon.
On both sides of the bar.
And I've been in recovery for a long time too.

There's nothing we can say right now
that's going to make a difference.

I am meaning this in the nicest way possible
but after reading this thread
i can safely say

... your bottom is showing.

It's just that you're the only one in the room who can't see it.

And that means here in recovery
and there - in the bar.

I truly hope you'll print this thread.

Prayers for the best for you.

I wish there was something I could do to help.

DayTrader

Proof positive that "treatment" won't keep you sober if you're an alcoholic.

Kjell

I was too. Once I finally wanted to be sober, more than I wanted to be drunk (and this took a lot of pain for me), it still took me over 6 months and another dui before I was able to have my last drink.

Since then, I've immursed myself in recovery, real honest hard work, and I haven't looked back since.

We can and do get sober. I'm living proof, but I'm not special. It's there for you too.

anaconda22

Thanks everyone. I did call the bar & spoke to the owner and Joe. The owner assured me that I would not be allowed to drink there anymore but he cannot bar me from the building. My buddy Joe told me that he thought I could hold my liquor & didn't realize there was even a problem. They had real good food there but I guess I will have to find someplace else to eat good hamburgers. I actually thought about suing them but slowly realizing that it's partly my fault. Still haven't gone to an AA meeting in my new area but honestly feel like I'm doing fine without them.

suki44883

I think you're fooling yourself, but...we learn (hopefully) from our mistakes. Good luck to you.

Stang

It's 100% your fault and you probably wouldn't have a leg to stand on in a suit!

anaconda22

I did what I thought was best for me. It's not a mistake but a wise decision. I am too busy with working, watching movies, playing video games, shopping ect... I don't have time to go to an AA meeting when a) I would have to walk there b) the meetings last over an hour and c) I enjoy sitting at home.