for anyone who is drinking during pregnancy or thinking about it..
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2007
Location: MN
Posts: 139
for anyone who is drinking during pregnancy or thinking about it..
hi there:
my name is Angie. I am 47 years old. We have two great young adult boys. ages 22 and 20. When I was pregnant with my oldest son, Andrew, I drank during pregnancy. Not tons, but enough. I didnt usually drink monday thru thursday. But when Friday came, I would have a few mixed diet cokes, like even 4 or 5 of them sometimes...Sat night I maight have one or 2 also..then usually not any more till the next weekend...there were many weeks I did not have any at all.
I never even knew about fetal alcohol stuff back then...wasnt talked about too much. So...when andrew was little, I noticed Andrew did not make friends easily, he played a lot by himself. when school started, his teacher would tell me he cant pay attention, disrupts class..etc.. trouble with relationships.
Finally in 5th grade..he was tested and found to have ADHD. He struggled thru to graduation, and graduated..with special ed help. He still struggles in his everyday life..there are things he just "doesnt get". Its hard to explain but I think there is more than ADHD going on there.... I live EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE, wondering if I caused this, and the tears flow even now as I tell you this. And I didnt even know at the time that I could be causing him lifelong problems.
And Pink firefly..here is my support to you...if and when you dooo stop drinking, there are many things you can make up for, and many people you can make ammends to....but..there are some things you will live with for the rest of your life. The fact that you already know what can happen........makes the tears flow even harder....please dont pick up the wine...pick up the phone.
my name is Angie. I am 47 years old. We have two great young adult boys. ages 22 and 20. When I was pregnant with my oldest son, Andrew, I drank during pregnancy. Not tons, but enough. I didnt usually drink monday thru thursday. But when Friday came, I would have a few mixed diet cokes, like even 4 or 5 of them sometimes...Sat night I maight have one or 2 also..then usually not any more till the next weekend...there were many weeks I did not have any at all.
I never even knew about fetal alcohol stuff back then...wasnt talked about too much. So...when andrew was little, I noticed Andrew did not make friends easily, he played a lot by himself. when school started, his teacher would tell me he cant pay attention, disrupts class..etc.. trouble with relationships.
Finally in 5th grade..he was tested and found to have ADHD. He struggled thru to graduation, and graduated..with special ed help. He still struggles in his everyday life..there are things he just "doesnt get". Its hard to explain but I think there is more than ADHD going on there.... I live EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE, wondering if I caused this, and the tears flow even now as I tell you this. And I didnt even know at the time that I could be causing him lifelong problems.
And Pink firefly..here is my support to you...if and when you dooo stop drinking, there are many things you can make up for, and many people you can make ammends to....but..there are some things you will live with for the rest of your life. The fact that you already know what can happen........makes the tears flow even harder....please dont pick up the wine...pick up the phone.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: peterborough Cambs U.K
Posts: 172
i could have written this post myself , i didnt drink much during pregnancy but i still wonder if my 21 year old sons learning problems are down to my drinking,
i just cant beat myself up about it anymore though, or i will never recover from this relentless addiction, i just wish sometimes i could turn the clock back,
like about 22 years...
i just cant beat myself up about it anymore though, or i will never recover from this relentless addiction, i just wish sometimes i could turn the clock back,
like about 22 years...
6/20/08
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 4,467
Wow. What brave, honest posts.
Alcoholism is tough. FAS is tougher....because it is something that you pass to your child...that they didn't have a voice in choosing. And it sounds like it's something you BOTH pay for.....forever. You can't quit FAS.
I thank you for this thread.
Alcoholism is tough. FAS is tougher....because it is something that you pass to your child...that they didn't have a voice in choosing. And it sounds like it's something you BOTH pay for.....forever. You can't quit FAS.
I thank you for this thread.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Ontario
Posts: 806
Originally Posted by discoveringme 
hi there:
my name is Angie. I am 47 years old. We have two great young adult boys. ages 22 and 20. When I was pregnant with my oldest son, Andrew, I drank during pregnancy. Not tons, but enough. I didnt usually drink monday thru thursday. But when Friday came, I would have a few mixed diet cokes, like even 4 or 5 of them sometimes...Sat night I maight have one or 2 also..then usually not any more till the next weekend...there were many weeks I did not have any at all.
I never even knew about fetal alcohol stuff back then...wasnt talked about too much. So...when andrew was little, I noticed Andrew did not make friends easily, he played a lot by himself. when school started, his teacher would tell me he cant pay attention, disrupts class..etc.. trouble with relationships.
Finally in 5th grade..he was tested and found to have ADHD. He struggled thru to graduation, and graduated..with special ed help. He still struggles in his everyday life..there are things he just "doesnt get". Its hard to explain but I think there is more than ADHD going on there.... I live EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE, wondering if I caused this, and the tears flow even now as I tell you this. And I didnt even know at the time that I could be causing him lifelong problems.
And Pink firefly..here is my support to you...if and when you dooo stop drinking, there are many things you can make up for, and many people you can make ammends to....but..there are some things you will live with for the rest of your life. The fact that you already know what can happen........makes the tears flow even harder....please dont pick up the wine...pick up the phone.
my name is Angie. I am 47 years old. We have two great young adult boys. ages 22 and 20. When I was pregnant with my oldest son, Andrew, I drank during pregnancy. Not tons, but enough. I didnt usually drink monday thru thursday. But when Friday came, I would have a few mixed diet cokes, like even 4 or 5 of them sometimes...Sat night I maight have one or 2 also..then usually not any more till the next weekend...there were many weeks I did not have any at all.
I never even knew about fetal alcohol stuff back then...wasnt talked about too much. So...when andrew was little, I noticed Andrew did not make friends easily, he played a lot by himself. when school started, his teacher would tell me he cant pay attention, disrupts class..etc.. trouble with relationships.
Finally in 5th grade..he was tested and found to have ADHD. He struggled thru to graduation, and graduated..with special ed help. He still struggles in his everyday life..there are things he just "doesnt get". Its hard to explain but I think there is more than ADHD going on there.... I live EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE, wondering if I caused this, and the tears flow even now as I tell you this. And I didnt even know at the time that I could be causing him lifelong problems.
And Pink firefly..here is my support to you...if and when you dooo stop drinking, there are many things you can make up for, and many people you can make ammends to....but..there are some things you will live with for the rest of your life. The fact that you already know what can happen........makes the tears flow even harder....please dont pick up the wine...pick up the phone.
powerful message..............thank you
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Land down under
Posts: 433
Hi Angie
Thank you for sharing what must have been a difficult thing to share.
I think what is a powerful thing to remember is this...
At times we do things because we know no better, and when we know better, we do better.
It's easy to judge someone when you have not walked in their shoes. Addiction is an ugly disease, please let's not judge others when we all have a less than perfect past ourselves.
Thanks again Angie for the share
Thank you for sharing what must have been a difficult thing to share.
I think what is a powerful thing to remember is this...
At times we do things because we know no better, and when we know better, we do better.
It's easy to judge someone when you have not walked in their shoes. Addiction is an ugly disease, please let's not judge others when we all have a less than perfect past ourselves.
Thanks again Angie for the share
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 2,058
Thank you for sharing Discover. I am in recovery and also am pregnant. I am blessed everything for support and help I have gotten.
Positive support is about providing solutions and experience not bashing.
Positive support is about providing solutions and experience not bashing.
I got nothin'
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: My house.
Posts: 4,890
Originally Posted by ozgoddess
It's easy to judge someone when you have not walked in their shoes. Addiction is an ugly disease, please let's not judge others when we all have a less than perfect past ourselves.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
Originally Posted by December15
Just like to add that a mother that drinks after the pregnancy has occurred can also cause the child to have learning disorders.
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