eire

I'd like to get your feedback on whether you think the person(s ) in your life has an understanding of what you're going through?

can two people understand each other? Or are we alone?

yeahgr8

An alcoholic can understand what an alcoholic is going through...you can definitely explain to a non-alcoholic, easier if they are on a spiritual path themselves, but some things they will never get...

Murray4x5

My wife understands and supports my not drinking, but I don't think she could ever know how it had taken over every aspect of my life. She can't ever have a real understanding of how terrified of the future I was; I had a clear vision of how I would die an ugly, early death if I kept slowly increasing my alcohol consumption.

She's 100% supportive because it means so much to me, and that's enough for her. She's just great and I'm a very, very, very lucky man.

Murray

Dee74

I'm assuming you mean with reference to alcoholism Eire

I think there are degrees of understanding.

I don't believe it's always necessary for someone to experience the same thing to empathise or understand - if that were true every counsellor and doctor in the world would need to have suffered every disease, for example. Sometimes I think it's helpful to get a outside non alcoholic perspective quite frankly.

I know myself I'm lucky to have friends who are not alcoholic but who understand sufficiently to be supportive and helpful in my sobriety.

D

Che

Not at all. Most people want to be right, not to understand.

It's not a 'my life is so hard' thing, as if we're war veterans with PTSD... But it's just that people are too quick to come to a conclusion, when it's really a very complex topic that can't be explained away in a phrase.

I believe there are people in this world who can listen for a long time, and those are the types of people who can come to understand others. But those are few and far between. I don't know if I am one of them, but I haven't met any. Many people really aren't any good at listening to themselves, either.

I wouldn't call it being alone, though. You can be in satisfying company with people who don't understand. Many times it's better that they don't. Sharing pain seems romantic, but in my experience it isn't worth it. It tends to thwart future happiness.

I don't know. It's frustrating. When you try to explain something to someone and they don't seem to try very hard to understand, you feel cheated. It's also weird. I think if I knew for certain someone would understand, I wouldn't want to tell them. To have that option and to not take it seems noble. To not have that option at all, feels helpless.

HidLid

People can understand each other if each person is willing to understand another. To understand others we have to willing to not only take in their viewpoints/motivations/feeling but we have to explore and communicate our own. For them to understand us they must do the same. It's a two way street, if it's treated as a one way or a no way there will always be misunderstands and conflict.

NewUser

Take a peek at the Friends and Family section, you will glean how much understanding there is real quick.

artsoul

I think people can have compassion and appreciation, but it probably takes someone in the same situation to really understand fully. Maybe it's because we don't know a lot about the mind yet. But things like substance abuse, OCD, depression, hoarding, anorexia, etc. etc...... it's really hard for people who don't have a disorder to understand it.

Hell, I didn't even understand why I kept drinking when everything in me told me I needed to stop!