Meeting Makers Make it..
Meeting Makers Make it..
i Know this Will **** off a few Folks.. in my A.A. Experience However.. it is a Truth! i had a guy tell me last week (Had 12 years sober) the Biggest Reason he thinks he Began Drinking Again was that he Stopped Going to Meetings! i have seen it Dozens of times with my Own Two Eyes! i am heading out to my home group this morning! peace..
Last edited by CarolD; 10-13-2010 at 07:38 PM. Reason: removedIncorrect Icon
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 268
I believe that to be true for the moderate drinker or the hard drinker, as it says in the book. But for the "real" alcoholic of the hopeless variety, like me, that isn't enough.
I know that when I stopped going to meetings that was the beginning of the end for me, because I also stopped working the steps and stopped working with others.
This is not to compare who is a worse alcoholic, but the book says that there are different types of alcoholics and for some maybe only going to meetings works. I just know that isn't enough for me.
.....and I don't think you are going to **** anyone off by stating your own experience.
I know that when I stopped going to meetings that was the beginning of the end for me, because I also stopped working the steps and stopped working with others.
This is not to compare who is a worse alcoholic, but the book says that there are different types of alcoholics and for some maybe only going to meetings works. I just know that isn't enough for me.
.....and I don't think you are going to **** anyone off by stating your own experience.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: WI
Posts: 228
I believe that to be true for the moderate drinker or the hard drinker, as it says in the book. But for the "real" alcoholic of the hopeless variety, like me, that isn't enough.
I know that when I stopped going to meetings that was the beginning of the end for me, because I also stopped working the steps and stopped working with others.
This is not to compare who is a worse alcoholic, but the book says that there are different types of alcoholics and for some maybe only going to meetings works. I just know that isn't enough for me.
.....and I don't think you are going to **** anyone off by stating your own experience.
I know that when I stopped going to meetings that was the beginning of the end for me, because I also stopped working the steps and stopped working with others.
This is not to compare who is a worse alcoholic, but the book says that there are different types of alcoholics and for some maybe only going to meetings works. I just know that isn't enough for me.
.....and I don't think you are going to **** anyone off by stating your own experience.
Meetings obviously are important, but, for me, recovering from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body took more than just showing up at meetings.
Working the program of AA... daily, continuously... for me, anyway... takes courage, above all.... Simple, but not easy, definitely not the path of least resistance. The fellowship of AA allows me to draw strength, encouragement and mostly.... inspiration.
So yea, meeting makers make it... and that's true for me, but only if I am working the program of AA.
So yea, meeting makers make it... and that's true for me, but only if I am working the program of AA.
Working the program of AA... daily, continuously... for me, anyway... takes courage, above all.... Simple, but not easy, definitely not the path of least resistance. The fellowship of AA allows me to draw strength, encouragement and mostly.... inspiration.
So yea, meeting makers make it... and that's true for me, but only if I am working the program of AA.
So yea, meeting makers make it... and that's true for me, but only if I am working the program of AA.
Guest
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,262
I'm going to go out on a limb and say I think the connection between "recovery" and "meetings" is only part of the picture. I went to some meetings, they helped. They did not stop me from drinking.
I had to find my own path and my own way out of this mess. Meetings may be the answer for some, but not all of us.
I'm finding my strength through yoga, fitness, spiritual and recovery reading, and connections to others on SR. I hope I make it, too.
I had to find my own path and my own way out of this mess. Meetings may be the answer for some, but not all of us.
I'm finding my strength through yoga, fitness, spiritual and recovery reading, and connections to others on SR. I hope I make it, too.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Whoa.
For the many who are not chooseing to do AA.....obviously
the concept of "meeting makers make it" simply is not true.
Nor does it have to be...lots of our SR members are happily
successfully sober without a structure of meetings.
Their recovery experiences are just as valid and positive
as we AA'rs
And to my fellow AA members.....please remember....
.
"Love and tolerance of others is our code"
BB-1st. Edotopm
:
For the many who are not chooseing to do AA.....obviously
the concept of "meeting makers make it" simply is not true.
Nor does it have to be...lots of our SR members are happily
successfully sober without a structure of meetings.
Their recovery experiences are just as valid and positive
as we AA'rs
And to my fellow AA members.....please remember....
.
"Love and tolerance of others is our code"
BB-1st. Edotopm
:
Whoa.......
For the many who are not chooseing to do AA.....obviously
the concept of "meeting makers make it" simply is not true.
Nor does it have to be...lots of our SR members are happily
successfully sober without a structure of meetings.
Their recovery experiences are just as valid and positive
as we AA'rs
And to our AA members.....please remember.....
"Love and tolerance of others is our code"
BB-1st. Edotopm
:
For the many who are not chooseing to do AA.....obviously
the concept of "meeting makers make it" simply is not true.
Nor does it have to be...lots of our SR members are happily
successfully sober without a structure of meetings.
Their recovery experiences are just as valid and positive
as we AA'rs
And to our AA members.....please remember.....
"Love and tolerance of others is our code"
BB-1st. Edotopm
:
...or possibly that he didn't...work the step's and get connected to God. Meetings don't treat alcoholism. Please do not share that opinion with the newcomer at your next meeting as you may be participating in their death. Without a spiritual experience, the real alcoholic will continue to drink and will end up in one of the three places my Big Book tells me about.
...or possibly that he didn't...work the step's and get connected to God. Meetings don't treat alcoholism. Please do not share that opinion with the newcomer at your next meeting as you may be participating in their death. Without a spiritual experience, the real alcoholic will continue to drink and will end up in one of the three places my Big Book tells me about.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 3,095
And that's why we in AA have a program, written down, to get away from everybody's opinion that may or may not work.
It's pretty simple. Here are the Steps we (the recovered alcoholics) took to recover from alcoholism as it's described in the book. That's what they did, and that's what I did. It's fine if someone doesn't want to do it, but it doesn't change the fact that it's what we did to recover.
If going to meetings produces the revolutionary change in outlook and perceptionwe know as a spiritual awakening, then you've hit on some new recovery program that ought to stand on it's own merits instead of glomming onto the AA program.
Yes, we know only a little. I find it a wonderful thing to actually make use of what we know. We know how to recover from alcoholism as the result of a spiritual awakening from the 12 Steps. We know that for sure.
When I use that little that was given to me, and stay in the actions of the AA program, I find that I don't troll around looking for others to co-sign a half-measure approach. Maybe time is better spent actually finishing the Steps and having the experience, instead of selling yourself short and trying to sell others short along with it.
It's pretty simple. Here are the Steps we (the recovered alcoholics) took to recover from alcoholism as it's described in the book. That's what they did, and that's what I did. It's fine if someone doesn't want to do it, but it doesn't change the fact that it's what we did to recover.
If going to meetings produces the revolutionary change in outlook and perceptionwe know as a spiritual awakening, then you've hit on some new recovery program that ought to stand on it's own merits instead of glomming onto the AA program.
Yes, we know only a little. I find it a wonderful thing to actually make use of what we know. We know how to recover from alcoholism as the result of a spiritual awakening from the 12 Steps. We know that for sure.
When I use that little that was given to me, and stay in the actions of the AA program, I find that I don't troll around looking for others to co-sign a half-measure approach. Maybe time is better spent actually finishing the Steps and having the experience, instead of selling yourself short and trying to sell others short along with it.
Reading threads like this is reminiscent of talking to people who have been 'saved' (in in, found Jesus).
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 268
Wow - it's true. I know I do that; I honestly feel that this is the ONLY way. I'm glad you pointed that out.
That said, there are many who have been saved in AA, so in that respect your analogy is not too far fetched.... except in AA, it is attraction, not promotion...
SSIL pretty much nailed it as to why I said what I did:-)
Honestly 24, I HATE that saying, I think I hate it more than any of the one-liners that I hear, ad nauseum, in meetings.
Here's why: by saying "meeting makers make it" it implies that if you want to "make it" (ie. stay sober) then you have to go to meetings. --which you don't. It also implies that if you want to "make it" you have to go to meetings.....which you don't.
For a hopeless alcoholic; someone who can't stay away from that first drink no-matter-what, for the person who finds no positive results with self-will, for the person who, once they DO stop drinking find their lives getting worse, the ONLY way to "get it" is to find a power greater than themselves to solve their drinking problem for them. That's done (one way, anyway) by working the steps.....and there isn't one step that mentions "going to meetings."
Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power Greater than ourselves."
Obviously, there's a therapeutic aspect behind the group setting - people gathered together sharing a common problem. Detox and rehab facilities use this same technique while ppl are "locked in" to help them deal with getting dry - but that doesn't treat the REAL ALCOHOLIC.
The real alcoholic has a 3-part problem: physical, mental and spiritual. Sitting at a meeting, IF it's a good one, might treat a bit of the mental issue and (if you're not drinking AT the meeting) you'll get another hour of the physical removal from alcohol.....but the spiritual side, the side most ppl who go back out ignore, that's not going to get treated in a meeting. The spiritual malady....the blockage from a power greater than yourself.... I don't see that getting much treatment at most meetings and when it does, I observe that the effects are fleeting.
As a matter of pure fact, IF "meeting makers make it" that would imply that ppl that go to lots of meetings stay sober - and that's not true either. While it's true that people with sobriety do tend to continue to make it to meetings, the reverse isn't true. In the one group I've gone to since day 1.....over 3+ years....... I couldn't even count the number of ppl who made it to "a lot" (by their standards) of meetings and went back out.....only to get another DUI, wreck the marriage, lose relationships with their kids, etc.
Heck, it just occurred to me.....my DAD made it to a lot of meetings for a couple years when I was 13 or so (I'm 41 now). He drank after a lot of them towards the end....and then went on a 25yr+ run with alcoholism in full force. In MY early attempts to get sober I was going to meetings and I drank after a bunch of 'em....a lot of the time I'd drink as soon as I got home from the meeting. I see guys all the TIME at loooots of meetings.....and each time it's the same: new drink date - yesterday,today or maybe a couple days ago / a week later - new drink date / a week later - new drink date. They're making it to meetings.....but they're not "making it." One of the guys in my home group....dude was the local chair of the audio visual board (lol....I laughed too... they provide old tapes or the Bill Wilson movie I guess... if a group wants to show a film or borrow some tapes), was hitting 5 meetings per week, and had 14 years - HE just went back out. That dude had meetings AND service.......he didn't "make it." --oh, I forgot, he also used to tell everyone to "put the plug in the jug" and to "bring the body, the mind WILL follow" -- it would appear, it doesn't. As a matter of fact, the ONLY ppl I know who are trying to quit but got drunk again I know from AA.....I met them there......AT MEETINGS.
"Meeting Makers Make It" is, to me, typically said by people because they're either too lazy to tell the truth, too afraid to tell the truth, or by well-meaning folks who aren't really alcoholics but really just needed a support group to avoid that first drink. And by "the truth" above, I mean: Go to meetings, get a sponsor, work the steps like your life depends upon it......because it does, to develop a relationship with a power greater than you and that power will remove the compulsion to drink since you CAN'T do it on your own and you won't be able to do it on your own.....ever (and if you can do it yourself or via a support group you're not really not an alcoholic but a heavy drinker instead that just needed a "sufficient reason" to stop so you don't need to come to AA....you just need to find a group of like-minded folks who need and provide "support"), then spend the rest of your live being of service to others so they too can experience what you just did - smashing all egotism, self centered thoughts and selfishness along the way, taking credit for nothing other than your willingness to be there for the miracle."
"Whether such a person can quit upon a nonspiritual basis depends upon the extent to which he has already lost the power to choose whether he will drink or not." I lost my ability to choose....no question about it....hanging around with a bunch of other folks who lost their choice too won't give me the power I NEED to get and stay sober - they don't have the power either. We all need it from a power greater than ourselves. Now, odds are, we'll want to get together to talk about how we found that power and what we did...but the talking won't give us the power. It's just talk.
heh..... got my dander up I guess.
Here's why: by saying "meeting makers make it" it implies that if you want to "make it" (ie. stay sober) then you have to go to meetings. --which you don't. It also implies that if you want to "make it" you have to go to meetings.....which you don't.
For a hopeless alcoholic; someone who can't stay away from that first drink no-matter-what, for the person who finds no positive results with self-will, for the person who, once they DO stop drinking find their lives getting worse, the ONLY way to "get it" is to find a power greater than themselves to solve their drinking problem for them. That's done (one way, anyway) by working the steps.....and there isn't one step that mentions "going to meetings."
Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power Greater than ourselves."
Obviously, there's a therapeutic aspect behind the group setting - people gathered together sharing a common problem. Detox and rehab facilities use this same technique while ppl are "locked in" to help them deal with getting dry - but that doesn't treat the REAL ALCOHOLIC.
The real alcoholic has a 3-part problem: physical, mental and spiritual. Sitting at a meeting, IF it's a good one, might treat a bit of the mental issue and (if you're not drinking AT the meeting) you'll get another hour of the physical removal from alcohol.....but the spiritual side, the side most ppl who go back out ignore, that's not going to get treated in a meeting. The spiritual malady....the blockage from a power greater than yourself.... I don't see that getting much treatment at most meetings and when it does, I observe that the effects are fleeting.
As a matter of pure fact, IF "meeting makers make it" that would imply that ppl that go to lots of meetings stay sober - and that's not true either. While it's true that people with sobriety do tend to continue to make it to meetings, the reverse isn't true. In the one group I've gone to since day 1.....over 3+ years....... I couldn't even count the number of ppl who made it to "a lot" (by their standards) of meetings and went back out.....only to get another DUI, wreck the marriage, lose relationships with their kids, etc.
Heck, it just occurred to me.....my DAD made it to a lot of meetings for a couple years when I was 13 or so (I'm 41 now). He drank after a lot of them towards the end....and then went on a 25yr+ run with alcoholism in full force. In MY early attempts to get sober I was going to meetings and I drank after a bunch of 'em....a lot of the time I'd drink as soon as I got home from the meeting. I see guys all the TIME at loooots of meetings.....and each time it's the same: new drink date - yesterday,today or maybe a couple days ago / a week later - new drink date / a week later - new drink date. They're making it to meetings.....but they're not "making it." One of the guys in my home group....dude was the local chair of the audio visual board (lol....I laughed too... they provide old tapes or the Bill Wilson movie I guess... if a group wants to show a film or borrow some tapes), was hitting 5 meetings per week, and had 14 years - HE just went back out. That dude had meetings AND service.......he didn't "make it." --oh, I forgot, he also used to tell everyone to "put the plug in the jug" and to "bring the body, the mind WILL follow" -- it would appear, it doesn't. As a matter of fact, the ONLY ppl I know who are trying to quit but got drunk again I know from AA.....I met them there......AT MEETINGS.
"Meeting Makers Make It" is, to me, typically said by people because they're either too lazy to tell the truth, too afraid to tell the truth, or by well-meaning folks who aren't really alcoholics but really just needed a support group to avoid that first drink. And by "the truth" above, I mean: Go to meetings, get a sponsor, work the steps like your life depends upon it......because it does, to develop a relationship with a power greater than you and that power will remove the compulsion to drink since you CAN'T do it on your own and you won't be able to do it on your own.....ever (and if you can do it yourself or via a support group you're not really not an alcoholic but a heavy drinker instead that just needed a "sufficient reason" to stop so you don't need to come to AA....you just need to find a group of like-minded folks who need and provide "support"), then spend the rest of your live being of service to others so they too can experience what you just did - smashing all egotism, self centered thoughts and selfishness along the way, taking credit for nothing other than your willingness to be there for the miracle."
"Whether such a person can quit upon a nonspiritual basis depends upon the extent to which he has already lost the power to choose whether he will drink or not." I lost my ability to choose....no question about it....hanging around with a bunch of other folks who lost their choice too won't give me the power I NEED to get and stay sober - they don't have the power either. We all need it from a power greater than ourselves. Now, odds are, we'll want to get together to talk about how we found that power and what we did...but the talking won't give us the power. It's just talk.
heh..... got my dander up I guess.
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