Can an Alcoholic live with someone who drinks?

Old 10-09-2010, 05:49 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
Evon's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Tn
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I currently live where alcohol is present and I'm ok with it. I actually even had a mini run in with alcohol when I almost poured a glass of a mixed drink into my cup. It was a friend of my roommates and she left the cup there and I thought it was just soda so I wasn't going to let it go to waste. I knew it wasn't soda when I was about to pour it into my cup. I knew the friend wasn't going to be coming back, so I asked my roommate if he wanted me to pour it down the sink or put it in the refrigerator, he said put it in the refrigerator, I might drink it later tonight.
I think for some people the external part of being around drinking can trigger them, whereas, I realize that I'm more of an internal person who drank to cope with my feelings. I've been sober for a month now and have learned to cope with those feelings positively. I actually just the other day was feeling a certain way and thought a drink would be nice right now. I then had a moment where I said wow so this is what I used to do. I used to feel a certain way and I'd turn to alcohol. I knew I couldn't let how I was feeling turn into a trigger ,then to use, I went running that night and felt a lot better than i would have if I drank.
I believe it's up to you to decide if you feel comfortable being around someone who drinks or not. I know I couldn't handle being around someone who drank heavily, but there are people who are able to do it. Like many others have said it's a personal choice.
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Old 10-09-2010, 06:06 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Location: Michigan
Posts: 2,910
Not sure if mine is alcoholic or not but we've been married for 28 years and I am not going to toss him out for drinking. He doesn't even try to hid it. I just have to remember that it is "my" problem not his.
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Old 10-10-2010, 03:08 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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What is more thoughtless.... Expecting a non-alcoholic non-abusive considerate spouse to quit drinking or to continue one's own non abusive enjoyment of a glass of wine (or beer, whatever) with a recovered alcoholic spouse in the home?

Note I said recovered.

My own, hard earned, experience is that it is the former. I should be careful with expectations made regarding my spouses or adult children in terms of their enjoyment of a legal beverage. When I had expectations I had severe resentments. When I (and they) were able to "Live and Let Live" we were all much happier.

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