angry in early sobriety
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 861
angry in early sobriety
Anyone else get angry in early sobriety?
I'm only on day 26. I am just irritated and angry. (I wake up joyful and feel lots of joy too.)
I have also been sick for almost 4 weeks and I'm very tired still. So part of my anger might be getting sick of being so tired. I do plan to get out today and try bike riding.
I am sure a big part of my anger is emotions that I was repressing with alcohol (and eating excessive sugar and caffeine). Those emotions are now coming up to the surface.
I want to throw things and hear them break. But I guess I'll settle on bike riding, art, journaling, martial arts, etc.
I have a therapist who is very helpful. And I will go to a Women for Sobriety meeting today (and maybe an AA meeting too).
Just curious if others feel/felt angry (and I want to make room for all of our emotions).
LOL OK- that smilie made me laugh!
I'm only on day 26. I am just irritated and angry. (I wake up joyful and feel lots of joy too.)
I have also been sick for almost 4 weeks and I'm very tired still. So part of my anger might be getting sick of being so tired. I do plan to get out today and try bike riding.
I am sure a big part of my anger is emotions that I was repressing with alcohol (and eating excessive sugar and caffeine). Those emotions are now coming up to the surface.
I want to throw things and hear them break. But I guess I'll settle on bike riding, art, journaling, martial arts, etc.
I have a therapist who is very helpful. And I will go to a Women for Sobriety meeting today (and maybe an AA meeting too).
Just curious if others feel/felt angry (and I want to make room for all of our emotions).
LOL OK- that smilie made me laugh!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 42
Give it time, I had many days where I was angry just plain angry and it wasn't caused by anything
or anyone in particular, I guess I was just feeling angry while sober for a change and I wasn't
used to feeling angry sober so the whole emotion was a huge thing to deal with.
I dealt with it by going to the gym as often as possible and it's helped me so far.
I guess when you take the booze away you will start to feel every emotion in a sober
way so in a sense you have to relearn how to deal with that since you're now sober.
Share with other people in AA that always helps me.
or anyone in particular, I guess I was just feeling angry while sober for a change and I wasn't
used to feeling angry sober so the whole emotion was a huge thing to deal with.
I dealt with it by going to the gym as often as possible and it's helped me so far.
I guess when you take the booze away you will start to feel every emotion in a sober
way so in a sense you have to relearn how to deal with that since you're now sober.
Share with other people in AA that always helps me.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Toronto
Posts: 318
I definitely got angry. Lots of times. Still do. One time I almost relapsed by letting my anger get the better of me, but I managed to make it through and learned some things about myself in the process.
What has helped me has been to analyze my anger. For me, anger is a response to some fear, so by changing the focus of the anger to the focus of what I am afraid and then breaking my fear down to what I can control and what I cannot control has helped me to make it through.
What has helped me has been to analyze my anger. For me, anger is a response to some fear, so by changing the focus of the anger to the focus of what I am afraid and then breaking my fear down to what I can control and what I cannot control has helped me to make it through.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Between Serenity and Despair
Posts: 522
I have had to do a lot of work to even begin to let go of the anger and resentment that was eating up my life.
If you're doing the AA or the Women for Sobriety steps, your step work should help you sort out some of your feelings.
Meditation really, really helps me. I've tried several guided meditations, but, right now, I'm working on learning to meditate without listening to a recording. I am learning the techniques from 8 Minute Meditation.
If you're doing the AA or the Women for Sobriety steps, your step work should help you sort out some of your feelings.
Meditation really, really helps me. I've tried several guided meditations, but, right now, I'm working on learning to meditate without listening to a recording. I am learning the techniques from 8 Minute Meditation.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 861
Thanks! It's nice to know I'm not the only one!
Bugzer- Thanks for understanding. I think the gym or some kind of intense exercise would help me too.
Omega10- Yeah- relapsing due to the anger worries me. I like the idea of determining what emotion is underneath the anger and breaking it down into manageable chunks.
lildawg- I like meditation too. Maybe meditating on the anger would help me. Often during meditation, I focus on whatever I am feeling or thinking at the moment. It amazes me how that can shift what I am experiencing or my relationship with what I am experiencing.
I want alcohol and I cannot have it safely! I'm wondering if my anger is partly a mourning process from alcohol. ("denial, anger, bargaining, depression, & acceptance" is one model for mourning.) I'm going for a bike ride- a short one since I am still very tired.
Bugzer- Thanks for understanding. I think the gym or some kind of intense exercise would help me too.
Omega10- Yeah- relapsing due to the anger worries me. I like the idea of determining what emotion is underneath the anger and breaking it down into manageable chunks.
lildawg- I like meditation too. Maybe meditating on the anger would help me. Often during meditation, I focus on whatever I am feeling or thinking at the moment. It amazes me how that can shift what I am experiencing or my relationship with what I am experiencing.
I want alcohol and I cannot have it safely! I'm wondering if my anger is partly a mourning process from alcohol. ("denial, anger, bargaining, depression, & acceptance" is one model for mourning.) I'm going for a bike ride- a short one since I am still very tired.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 443
Yepper dupper,
I just started a thread about this myself. I was doing Okay after the first couple of weeks, pretty dandy actually, and then this anger, nay RAGE just took over me on and off for two days. Now, I'm sad! WTF, I feel like I just acquired a mood disorder. I feel exhausted right now, honestly.
You are definitely not alone. Unfortunately for me, I already work out at the Gym 5 and mountain bike 5 times a week, so if that ain't doin' it for me, I'm not sure if I can exercise my way out of this faze. Yikes. Hang in there, and I'll try to too.
Cheers.
I just started a thread about this myself. I was doing Okay after the first couple of weeks, pretty dandy actually, and then this anger, nay RAGE just took over me on and off for two days. Now, I'm sad! WTF, I feel like I just acquired a mood disorder. I feel exhausted right now, honestly.
You are definitely not alone. Unfortunately for me, I already work out at the Gym 5 and mountain bike 5 times a week, so if that ain't doin' it for me, I'm not sure if I can exercise my way out of this faze. Yikes. Hang in there, and I'll try to too.
Cheers.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
Yup, absolutely normal at this stage of the game. For all the reasons you mentioned.
It gets better. I get angry once in a while now (four and a half years sober), but it isn't my constant companion, and it rarely lasts long. I have MUCH better ways to cope with it now!
It gets better. I get angry once in a while now (four and a half years sober), but it isn't my constant companion, and it rarely lasts long. I have MUCH better ways to cope with it now!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Pine Grove, PA
Posts: 146
Sounds about right--When I got sober the only emotion I could identify was anger. With time I have been able to recognize the emotions that were triggering the anger. The one that stood out was FEAR. Keep on track and it will get better
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
I was soooo angry early on. I remember googling anger management because I had this uncontrollable rage. But to be honest all of my emotional responses were exaggerated early on, it was pretty comical in a way. I was just as likely to get snappy as I was to burst into tears. It all levels out eventually x
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 47
I was extremely angry and had a ton of fear when I sobered up. In fact, the emotional turmoil really surprised me ... I didn't expect that. It was very difficult, but I hung in there and in time my anger mellowed out a lot.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Manchester UK
Posts: 6
Hi, I am 11 months sober and logged on today because I am struggling a bit with anger and then I saw this thread!
When I put the drink down I experienced what I felt was quite severe depression for the rest of 2012. I experienced negative emotions and a sense of hopelessness for quite some time. Within that I came to realise that my head tends to want to find a reason for it and I was blaming blaming blaming. My head would just do that, indulge in resentment against people.
As time has passed I have found that my sense of a Higher Power has been awakened (by being as honest as I can be through the steps) and I can find some peace- if I trust my Higher Power and hand it over. Meditation and prayer help.
However, at the moment I seem to be experiencing this anger which I can feel in almost every cell of my body. My head looks to fix it with things like food but that doesn't work.
It is frustrating. I keep thinking I am recovering and feeling great, then boom- I am levelled by these emotions that I can't control.
Recovery is sometimes slow and painful.
It always helps to know that others get this too and it is not just me.
When I put the drink down I experienced what I felt was quite severe depression for the rest of 2012. I experienced negative emotions and a sense of hopelessness for quite some time. Within that I came to realise that my head tends to want to find a reason for it and I was blaming blaming blaming. My head would just do that, indulge in resentment against people.
As time has passed I have found that my sense of a Higher Power has been awakened (by being as honest as I can be through the steps) and I can find some peace- if I trust my Higher Power and hand it over. Meditation and prayer help.
However, at the moment I seem to be experiencing this anger which I can feel in almost every cell of my body. My head looks to fix it with things like food but that doesn't work.
It is frustrating. I keep thinking I am recovering and feeling great, then boom- I am levelled by these emotions that I can't control.
Recovery is sometimes slow and painful.
It always helps to know that others get this too and it is not just me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,236
Not accepting people, places and things on lifes
terms or just the way they should be often made
me angry and some still do today some 22yrs
later. However, not bad enough to make me
want to throw all that Ive worked so hard for
in recovery to drink over.
I picked up many useful tools and learned healthier
ways to deal with these people, places and things
that i use to be angry over and drink because of
them.
Anger is just one of many emotions we experience
as human beings and is very normal to have them.
With Angery feelings they usually turn into resentments
which i would have drank over to numb those feelings
so i wouldnt have to deal with them. Just emotional
pain all around making me feel very uncomfortable.
With many one days at a time sober, i listened and
learned from other members who learned to stay
sober themselves and how they delt with anger and
accepting people, places and things on lifes terms
allowed me to stay sober and enjoy living a rewarding
life in recovery.
I found that taking my time, being kind and gentle
with myself and remain teachable, then i can put
anger and other uncomfortable feelings in their place
where they belong.
So can you.
terms or just the way they should be often made
me angry and some still do today some 22yrs
later. However, not bad enough to make me
want to throw all that Ive worked so hard for
in recovery to drink over.
I picked up many useful tools and learned healthier
ways to deal with these people, places and things
that i use to be angry over and drink because of
them.
Anger is just one of many emotions we experience
as human beings and is very normal to have them.
With Angery feelings they usually turn into resentments
which i would have drank over to numb those feelings
so i wouldnt have to deal with them. Just emotional
pain all around making me feel very uncomfortable.
With many one days at a time sober, i listened and
learned from other members who learned to stay
sober themselves and how they delt with anger and
accepting people, places and things on lifes terms
allowed me to stay sober and enjoy living a rewarding
life in recovery.
I found that taking my time, being kind and gentle
with myself and remain teachable, then i can put
anger and other uncomfortable feelings in their place
where they belong.
So can you.
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