Assuming no one gets hurt physically, can a DUI be a positive thing?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Road to recovery
Posts: 866
Assuming no one gets hurt physically, can a DUI be a positive thing?
Been wondering about this and maybe people have some thoughts.
Start with the title of this thread.
Add a late stage alcoholic with a close relative that enables to the point that bottom has not been hit when it would have for any of the rest of us at any time over the last 3 to 5 years.
Would or could a DUI with no physical injury to anyone be a good thing?
Do they detox people safely in jail these days in major cities?
If its a second offense with the first being about 15 years ago do they release on bail?
If convicted I assume some rehab/counseling would be part of the prison program?
I guess the key to my question is - does it turn them around? if so then it's a good thing. I'd like to think it gets them sober long enough to think about it at least.
Wonder what the recidivism rate is when released?
Either way it's sad which brings up another question.
Are some people too far into the progression of the disease to recover?
Start with the title of this thread.
Add a late stage alcoholic with a close relative that enables to the point that bottom has not been hit when it would have for any of the rest of us at any time over the last 3 to 5 years.
Would or could a DUI with no physical injury to anyone be a good thing?
Do they detox people safely in jail these days in major cities?
If its a second offense with the first being about 15 years ago do they release on bail?
If convicted I assume some rehab/counseling would be part of the prison program?
I guess the key to my question is - does it turn them around? if so then it's a good thing. I'd like to think it gets them sober long enough to think about it at least.
Wonder what the recidivism rate is when released?
Either way it's sad which brings up another question.
Are some people too far into the progression of the disease to recover?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 401
It's a great question. I'm on day #8 of sobriety. If my license was taken away from me due to a DUI I don't know what I would do. Having a good job & a steady income I've always been able to afford my house/relationship/alcoholism for years. My partner doesn't let me drink in front of her so I've had to resort to drinking on my way home from work for years now. I've taken familiar streets and alleys on my way home while drinking. If I ever lost my license I would immediately lose my job and hit my(financial) rock bottom for sure. I often think that getting a DUI years ago would have saved my liver.....instead I've been a "professional" alcoholic and although I never killed anyone I've done a pretty good job of killing myself in the meantime.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Road to recovery
Posts: 866
Congrats on day 8 as well as the decision to make it to day 8.
Visit SR often...it really helps a lot.
I'm grateful I quit drinking for many many reasons, but one of the things I'm most grateful for is not having the risk of killing/hurting someone due to my drinking. When I think of how I would have felt to kill/hurt someone's mother/father/son/daughter/wife/husband etc. I don't think I could have lived with myself.
Visit SR often...it really helps a lot.
I'm grateful I quit drinking for many many reasons, but one of the things I'm most grateful for is not having the risk of killing/hurting someone due to my drinking. When I think of how I would have felt to kill/hurt someone's mother/father/son/daughter/wife/husband etc. I don't think I could have lived with myself.
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: SoCal CA
Posts: 1,319
I wasn't going to quit drinking after my first, but I did get good counseling and had to attend AA for awhile. But it didn't affect me enough to quit at the time, even though it hurt me pretty bad financially (about 10K that I didn't have). and my license was suspended for 6 months, (but I had to drive to work so I did). As far as detox in the jail, they gave me a baloney sandwich which made for a great pillow.
On the other hand an uncle of mine, who is an alcoholic much like myself ended up getting 2 duis in about a years time. He was always the drunkest guy for as long as I can remember, and after his second he quit cold turkey about 5 years ago. His family owns a successful mfg company, and I'm not sure whether they pressured him to quit drinking, or whether it was the courts, but he has quit entirely, and it was obvious that the booze would have probably killed him if he didn't quit.
So I say for some people it might be enough, but you see so many repeat offenders on the news, and when I went I blew a pretty big number so everyone I was with in my couseling groups was on their 2nd, 3rd, and even one guy was on his 4th. So I would probably guess it is not that big of a deterent.
On the other hand an uncle of mine, who is an alcoholic much like myself ended up getting 2 duis in about a years time. He was always the drunkest guy for as long as I can remember, and after his second he quit cold turkey about 5 years ago. His family owns a successful mfg company, and I'm not sure whether they pressured him to quit drinking, or whether it was the courts, but he has quit entirely, and it was obvious that the booze would have probably killed him if he didn't quit.
So I say for some people it might be enough, but you see so many repeat offenders on the news, and when I went I blew a pretty big number so everyone I was with in my couseling groups was on their 2nd, 3rd, and even one guy was on his 4th. So I would probably guess it is not that big of a deterent.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: far far from home
Posts: 373
Been wondering about this and maybe people have some thoughts.
Start with the title of this thread.
Add a late stage alcoholic with a close relative that enables to the point that bottom has not been hit when it would have for any of the rest of us at any time over the last 3 to 5 years.
Would or could a DUI with no physical injury to anyone be a good thing?
Start with the title of this thread.
Add a late stage alcoholic with a close relative that enables to the point that bottom has not been hit when it would have for any of the rest of us at any time over the last 3 to 5 years.
Would or could a DUI with no physical injury to anyone be a good thing?
It was a great thing for me. A DUI led to a judge mandating me to go to AA (I had been a member prior but stopped going) and as a pre-trial condition before disposition I was on random alcohol screening, a failed test would have meant jail, the judge was explicit about this. For some reason the thought of spending the summer in jail sucked. I was almost dead due to health issues but the jail thing clicked with me.
I actually spent about ten months sober wanting to bring harm to the Massachusetts State Trooper who arrested me. About a year and a half into this thing I sent him a thank you letter. It has been 2 years and 4 months since that DUI and I am still sober. I believe it was divine intervention.
Do they detox people safely in jail these days in major cities?
If its a second offense with the first being about 15 years ago do they release on bail?
If convicted I assume some rehab/counseling would be part of the prison program?
I guess the key to my question is - does it turn them around? if so then it's a good thing. I'd like to think it gets them sober long enough to think about it at least.
Are some people too far into the progression of the disease to recover?
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
I'm with Chops on this one. #1 scared me and I quit for 6 months or so afterward for a variety of reasons. Sometime in the next handful of years, when I went back drinking and partying, I crossed "that line" and got (became) out of control.
#2 was a toughie....guilt, shame, expense, +++...but I was back at it in no time.
#3 was REEEEALLY tough.....but again, I was back at it in no time.
About 5 or 6 months after #3 I had my last drink (I just dont remember the date of my arrest or I could tell you).
My point is, for a drinker who's crossed the line spoken of in the AA book, dui's, threats of jail, fines, etc just aren't a deterrent. I was going to keep drinking no matter what. I figured I'd just have to be more careful, plan better, "drink smarter" and so on.
Were it not for the fellowship in AA being willing to carry the message to me.....even though I didn't necessarily want to hear the message at first....I wouldn't have considered trying to "stay stopped." Were it not for the "program" in AA (the steps, a connection to a Higher Power, and a complete change in my life and lifestyle that I was never able to come close to doing on my own) I'm sure I'd be back in a bottle by now.
Things work out the way they work out. What got me to a point of reasonableness won't be enough for someone else....and it may be overkill for another. The DUI's were not what made me stop, that came from a place of power way over those judges.....although the God of my understanding may have used those judges to get to me.
So..... yeah, a DUI can lead to good things.........but not necessarily.
#2 was a toughie....guilt, shame, expense, +++...but I was back at it in no time.
#3 was REEEEALLY tough.....but again, I was back at it in no time.
About 5 or 6 months after #3 I had my last drink (I just dont remember the date of my arrest or I could tell you).
My point is, for a drinker who's crossed the line spoken of in the AA book, dui's, threats of jail, fines, etc just aren't a deterrent. I was going to keep drinking no matter what. I figured I'd just have to be more careful, plan better, "drink smarter" and so on.
Were it not for the fellowship in AA being willing to carry the message to me.....even though I didn't necessarily want to hear the message at first....I wouldn't have considered trying to "stay stopped." Were it not for the "program" in AA (the steps, a connection to a Higher Power, and a complete change in my life and lifestyle that I was never able to come close to doing on my own) I'm sure I'd be back in a bottle by now.
Things work out the way they work out. What got me to a point of reasonableness won't be enough for someone else....and it may be overkill for another. The DUI's were not what made me stop, that came from a place of power way over those judges.....although the God of my understanding may have used those judges to get to me.
So..... yeah, a DUI can lead to good things.........but not necessarily.
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Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: far far from home
Posts: 373
The DUI's were not what made me stop, that came from a place of power way over those judges.....although the God of my understanding may have used those judges to get to me.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
It completely depends on the person. Everyone has a different "bottom"--which I define as the point at which the pain of continuing on as I was outweighed the pain of taking action to change it. It didn't take so much for me. For other people it takes much more.
I never got a DWI, not that I didn't deserve one. For me, it might have meant the end of my career. What DID stop me was when I had to have a colleague drive me home from work because I was so sick from withdrawal that I couldn't drive.
For some people, nothing seems to be important enough to stop.
I never got a DWI, not that I didn't deserve one. For me, it might have meant the end of my career. What DID stop me was when I had to have a colleague drive me home from work because I was so sick from withdrawal that I couldn't drive.
For some people, nothing seems to be important enough to stop.
Thriving sober since 12/18/08
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Orlando, FL
Posts: 3,115
I'm sure some people are "scared straight" from having a DUI charge.. but I have yet to meet any. I know a lot of people that have had DUIs (several in some cases) and none of those particular people are sober.. they just started walking or biking to the bar, and using their 'bad luck' as an excuse to keep going.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,237
Hi Joined...
Well I was arrested in Jan 2010 for a DUI and have been sober ever since...just had my 7 months sobriety yesterday!! I really think it depends on the person, for me it changed my life...It was a blessing in disguise...
Well I was arrested in Jan 2010 for a DUI and have been sober ever since...just had my 7 months sobriety yesterday!! I really think it depends on the person, for me it changed my life...It was a blessing in disguise...
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Southwest MI
Posts: 24
My DUI scared me straight. Granted I have been sober for only 38 days, but really I have not missed it, and I was drinking 1/2pint to a pint a day of rum. No one was hurt in my accident (other than my van, which was totaled). To me, the idea of going back to jail for three months if I break probation and drink is not worth it. I am fortunate in that I have not had the withdrawal symptoms and cravings.
Can I predict if I will stay sober for the rest of my life...no. It really only since I have been here that I realized what being an alcoholic actually means. I have a lot to sort out in the next month and a half of my probation. I do know now though, that I can be sober and I do not HAVE to have alcohol.
Can I predict if I will stay sober for the rest of my life...no. It really only since I have been here that I realized what being an alcoholic actually means. I have a lot to sort out in the next month and a half of my probation. I do know now though, that I can be sober and I do not HAVE to have alcohol.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Michigan
Posts: 758
I haven't read all the above posts so excuse me if I repeat any thing thats said, but I have 3 Dui's in my life. My first 2 I learned nothing from. But by my 3rd one I finally grew up and realized how I was putting other peoples lives at stake besides my own life and to this day I have never drank&drove since that 3rd DUI.
So yeah...it may take a while, but you can learn from a DUI so it can be a positive thing.
So yeah...it may take a while, but you can learn from a DUI so it can be a positive thing.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Road to recovery
Posts: 866
Rather than hitting the thanks button on each post, let me say thanks to all here for doing what is so great about SR which is giving a variety of answers from experience. Special thanks to Chops for taking the time to answer each part separately.
Guess it makes perfect sense that a DUI could be good and for some it's just another speed bump on the drinking career for others.
It's all in how you react to it. Could be that wake up call or it could be ignored.
Reminds me of an old joke (or whatever you want to call this)
There's a bad flood and this guy gets up on his roof when the water is coming in his house.
Guy comes by with a boat and says the river is rising get in and I'll take you to high ground.
Homeowner says thanks but his god will save him.
Water rises to the edge of the roof.
Another guy comes by in a boat and says the river is supposed to keep rising, get in.
Homeowner says thanks but his god will save him.
Finally the water is almost to the top of the house
Helicopter comes by and throws down a rope
Homeowner says thanks but his god will save him.
Water covers the house and the man drowns.
Man goes to heaven and meets god.
He says, God I don't understand. I had faith in you all my life and I believed that you would save me.
God says, I sent you two boats and and a helicopter what more did you want?
The help is there but you have to accept it.
Guess it makes perfect sense that a DUI could be good and for some it's just another speed bump on the drinking career for others.
It's all in how you react to it. Could be that wake up call or it could be ignored.
Reminds me of an old joke (or whatever you want to call this)
There's a bad flood and this guy gets up on his roof when the water is coming in his house.
Guy comes by with a boat and says the river is rising get in and I'll take you to high ground.
Homeowner says thanks but his god will save him.
Water rises to the edge of the roof.
Another guy comes by in a boat and says the river is supposed to keep rising, get in.
Homeowner says thanks but his god will save him.
Finally the water is almost to the top of the house
Helicopter comes by and throws down a rope
Homeowner says thanks but his god will save him.
Water covers the house and the man drowns.
Man goes to heaven and meets god.
He says, God I don't understand. I had faith in you all my life and I believed that you would save me.
God says, I sent you two boats and and a helicopter what more did you want?
The help is there but you have to accept it.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: albuquerque, new mexico
Posts: 63
Personal Experience. 26 years old , 1st time I got arrested for a DUI, first conviction. Happened the night of January 26, 2010, technically the morning of the 27th. I got pulled over, knew I was ******, and in the midst of my disease didn't care. I'll try to attach my mug shot to this post if I can. I'm smiling my ass off. My conviction came in mid June 2010. I slowed down some at first on drinking, in public... And just got smashed at 'house parties'.... I started going back to bars/clubs after a few months, not really getting too smashed ... as I was aware that being in a bar was against the conditions of my release. Well When I got convicted... Gees what a dumb ass i was looking back. The night before court, I was at a friends place, we had a few friends over and what did I do? I got blitzed... drunk as drunk. So when 9am court rolled around, I was literally drunk still. I show up to court, on time 
LOL and my lawyer is talking me into pleading out, I had hoped my cops wouldn't show and it would get tossed out... They showed. So as we're writing out the plea agreement she asks me... When you go over to probation and parole and they test you, are you gonna come back negative. I look her dead in the eyes ( i'm sure reaking of booze) and say YA. Again she says, ARE YOU SURE. I say, YES I"M SURE. LOL, how dumb. ( i did not actually get tested that day, or I would have went to jail that day) My sentence: I got probation for a year, a year of an ignition interlock, had to go for evaluation for alcohol counciling, had community service hours, had DWI school to attend, had a MAD victim impact panel to attend and all these lovely fees to pay... A bunch of **** that I HAD to do, or go to jail. It was simple. Most importantly, my PO and lawyer wanted to make it clear, if I got 'caught' drinking my judge would surely mandate me to jail. I had been tested the night I got arrested and I blew a 0.24, 3 times my states legal limit. Which in my state anything over 0.16 is an aggrivated DUI. I was laughing... I wasn't even 'that drunk' I remembered the whole night. I was so curious as to what I would of tested on the nights I hadn't remembered driving home and yet I woke up in my bed.... I was literally insane from the alcohol addiction. I had no rational thoughts. My plea however was reduced to dropping the speeding violation that got me pulled over in the first place, my 'hitting the curb' citation as I 'pulled over' and changed to just a first time DUI offense. Thank God I wasn't looking at the felony charge of aggravated DUI. Anyway... even after my conviction and being warned by my lawyer, my PO and too many friends and family... I kept boozing... and boozing I did. You can read about my last binge which is in the thread about "the worst blackout you've ever had" So that last binge was July 7th, 2010. I had my evaluation with an 'alcohol councilor' a day or two after that. I was bruised up from my fall and I was ****** honest as all hell with him. From the age i remember drinking to my alcoholic parents, sibling, relatives , ex-husband, friends, and I also shared the quantity I drink, and what I drank on that last binge ( about an 18 pack and a 5th of vodka) his jaw nearly hit the ground... I was chuckling inside. I knew I was a rather sever case, considering I was only 27 and I had drank more in the last 20 years than most people ever will in their life. Anyway, he mandated me, through his 'recommendation' to my PO and the court to 6 ******* months, are you kidding 6 months of weekly sessions. I was like WTF, seriously... 6 months... O well. I knew i was stopping anyway ( talks about it more in the blackout post) That initial day with him he recommended AA, and I said in my head, **** you dude. I tried AA , it don't work for me. And the next week, he said, "you make it to a meeting yet?", "nope" i replied. The next week " you make it to a meeting yet?" "nope" and then the conversation... You really need to go to an AA meeting. And I talk weekly with your PO and I report your progress here, and I'm "suggesting" LOL you go to AA. **** **** ****. so i went... and kept going. And here I am, finally happy and 49 days sober.
So, NO the DUI did not change my drinking .... The counciling *(a side-effect) of the DUI did change my drinking.
LOL and my lawyer is talking me into pleading out, I had hoped my cops wouldn't show and it would get tossed out... They showed. So as we're writing out the plea agreement she asks me... When you go over to probation and parole and they test you, are you gonna come back negative. I look her dead in the eyes ( i'm sure reaking of booze) and say YA. Again she says, ARE YOU SURE. I say, YES I"M SURE. LOL, how dumb. ( i did not actually get tested that day, or I would have went to jail that day) My sentence: I got probation for a year, a year of an ignition interlock, had to go for evaluation for alcohol counciling, had community service hours, had DWI school to attend, had a MAD victim impact panel to attend and all these lovely fees to pay... A bunch of **** that I HAD to do, or go to jail. It was simple. Most importantly, my PO and lawyer wanted to make it clear, if I got 'caught' drinking my judge would surely mandate me to jail. I had been tested the night I got arrested and I blew a 0.24, 3 times my states legal limit. Which in my state anything over 0.16 is an aggrivated DUI. I was laughing... I wasn't even 'that drunk' I remembered the whole night. I was so curious as to what I would of tested on the nights I hadn't remembered driving home and yet I woke up in my bed.... I was literally insane from the alcohol addiction. I had no rational thoughts. My plea however was reduced to dropping the speeding violation that got me pulled over in the first place, my 'hitting the curb' citation as I 'pulled over' and changed to just a first time DUI offense. Thank God I wasn't looking at the felony charge of aggravated DUI. Anyway... even after my conviction and being warned by my lawyer, my PO and too many friends and family... I kept boozing... and boozing I did. You can read about my last binge which is in the thread about "the worst blackout you've ever had" So that last binge was July 7th, 2010. I had my evaluation with an 'alcohol councilor' a day or two after that. I was bruised up from my fall and I was ****** honest as all hell with him. From the age i remember drinking to my alcoholic parents, sibling, relatives , ex-husband, friends, and I also shared the quantity I drink, and what I drank on that last binge ( about an 18 pack and a 5th of vodka) his jaw nearly hit the ground... I was chuckling inside. I knew I was a rather sever case, considering I was only 27 and I had drank more in the last 20 years than most people ever will in their life. Anyway, he mandated me, through his 'recommendation' to my PO and the court to 6 ******* months, are you kidding 6 months of weekly sessions. I was like WTF, seriously... 6 months... O well. I knew i was stopping anyway ( talks about it more in the blackout post) That initial day with him he recommended AA, and I said in my head, **** you dude. I tried AA , it don't work for me. And the next week, he said, "you make it to a meeting yet?", "nope" i replied. The next week " you make it to a meeting yet?" "nope" and then the conversation... You really need to go to an AA meeting. And I talk weekly with your PO and I report your progress here, and I'm "suggesting" LOL you go to AA. **** **** ****. so i went... and kept going. And here I am, finally happy and 49 days sober. So, NO the DUI did not change my drinking .... The counciling *(a side-effect) of the DUI did change my drinking.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Road to recovery
Posts: 866
jmf7dd, two things you said stand out the most for me
First, your observation where you say - ... I was literally insane from the alcohol addiction
That is something that is hard for some people to understand that have never been addicted to anything. Hard for them to understand how we couldn't just see for ourselves how we were ruining our lives and those around us while we were drinking or using. Something has to "snap us out of it"
Second, if I was keeping score, which I'm not, I would count the good from the side-effect of the DUI in the yes column for my original question.
First, your observation where you say - ... I was literally insane from the alcohol addiction
That is something that is hard for some people to understand that have never been addicted to anything. Hard for them to understand how we couldn't just see for ourselves how we were ruining our lives and those around us while we were drinking or using. Something has to "snap us out of it"
Second, if I was keeping score, which I'm not, I would count the good from the side-effect of the DUI in the yes column for my original question.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 85
Can't really give a good answer to your DUI question, as I think every place is different.
In the small town I live in, if you get pulled over and the cops see you live in this the small town they let you go.
As for "are some people too far into the progression of the disease to recover....I am going to be positive and say "no" we can all recover.
I have a neighbor who died and was brought back after going thru the DT's. He doesn't drink..but has some brain damage.
In the small town I live in, if you get pulled over and the cops see you live in this the small town they let you go.
As for "are some people too far into the progression of the disease to recover....I am going to be positive and say "no" we can all recover.
I have a neighbor who died and was brought back after going thru the DT's. He doesn't drink..but has some brain damage.
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