Sobriety vs. Recovery
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Great Lakes Region
Posts: 1
Sobriety vs. Recovery
Before I pose my question, I should introduce myself. My name is Meltdown and today is my eighth day of sobriety. As my name suggests, I have really had to peel away the outer layers of my veneer for me to finally realize that I am an alcoholic and have been for a very long time. Like I suspect it was for many of you, it has been a very long journey to get to this point in my life (both drinking and sobriety), but I hit my bottom last Friday during the day and while I have been tempted to drink since then, I worked through the feelings. In fact, my bottom was so scary that I quit cold turkey, even though I knew there was the possibility of serious withdrawal symptoms. I was very fortunate that my physical symptoms were mild (compared to others), ranging from diarrhea and insomnia to just feeling like crap for a couple of days. Every day I've felt clearer and cleaner and I find it hard to believe that I spent the last twenty years of my life heavily medicating myself with booze.
I have been lurking in these forums for a while now and the one question that seems to pop up in my head as I read the stories of recovery and sobriety is exactly that: What is the difference between sobriety and recovery? At this stage of the game, I am happy to be sober and plan to stay that way. Is recovery the next step? If so, does recovery specifically involve AA or are there ways to recover in a non-AA setting? What does recovery get you that sobriety doesn't?
Thanks for your time.
I have been lurking in these forums for a while now and the one question that seems to pop up in my head as I read the stories of recovery and sobriety is exactly that: What is the difference between sobriety and recovery? At this stage of the game, I am happy to be sober and plan to stay that way. Is recovery the next step? If so, does recovery specifically involve AA or are there ways to recover in a non-AA setting? What does recovery get you that sobriety doesn't?
Thanks for your time.
Belgian Sheepdog Adictee
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: In Today
Posts: 6,101
First, let me say WELCOME to Sober Recovery. You have found a great place, with wonderful folks who have lots of ES&H (Experience, Strength and Hope) to share with you.
As to 'programs.' There is a 'sticky' in this forum of various programs:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
As to Sobriety vs Recovery. Here's the way I look at it. When I finally reached my bottom and put the plug in the jug, I went through horrendous withdrawals, to the point of literally dying (my story is in the story section).
After withdrawal and all the toxins were out of my body I was sober. However, there was a lot more to being an alcoholic than just the booze. I learned that alcohol was just a symptom of deeper seated issues.
That is where Recovery comes in. When I got sober in 1981 AA was pretty much the only game in town and to be honest I am glad that it saved me making a decision of what 'program' to use, lol
The 12 steps of AA are in the proper order and by working them and then learning how to live them on a daily basis I have recovered from a seemingless hopeless state of mind and body (does not mean I can drink, lmao, but does mean I am no longer crazy, crazy making, or hurting and harming others).
I have found over the years, both for myself and in working with others that just putting the plug in the jug does not cut it. If that and only that is done, time after time, I have seen folks return to drinking. However, upon those same folks finding a recovery program and working their azzes off, they somehow seem to grow and change into functionin, productive members of the human race.
J M H O
Hope that helps a bit to clear up your question.
Love and hugs,
As to 'programs.' There is a 'sticky' in this forum of various programs:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
As to Sobriety vs Recovery. Here's the way I look at it. When I finally reached my bottom and put the plug in the jug, I went through horrendous withdrawals, to the point of literally dying (my story is in the story section).
After withdrawal and all the toxins were out of my body I was sober. However, there was a lot more to being an alcoholic than just the booze. I learned that alcohol was just a symptom of deeper seated issues.
That is where Recovery comes in. When I got sober in 1981 AA was pretty much the only game in town and to be honest I am glad that it saved me making a decision of what 'program' to use, lol
The 12 steps of AA are in the proper order and by working them and then learning how to live them on a daily basis I have recovered from a seemingless hopeless state of mind and body (does not mean I can drink, lmao, but does mean I am no longer crazy, crazy making, or hurting and harming others).
I have found over the years, both for myself and in working with others that just putting the plug in the jug does not cut it. If that and only that is done, time after time, I have seen folks return to drinking. However, upon those same folks finding a recovery program and working their azzes off, they somehow seem to grow and change into functionin, productive members of the human race.
J M H O
Hope that helps a bit to clear up your question.
Love and hugs,
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
There are a lot of new approaches to alcohol, addiction and recovery. AA works for some and not others. I think, whatever path you choose you have to be prepared to work at it and make changes in your life.
SR is a good place to start. There are a number of sections here that discuss different ways to be well.
Good luck.
SR is a good place to start. There are a number of sections here that discuss different ways to be well.
Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: St. Louis, MO
Posts: 638
I view being sober simply as not drinking while recovery is working on yourself so that you do not feel the need to drink. I'm not in AA per say but I do go to a meeting sometimes here and there. Also I read a lot of book such as "Under the Influence", "Dry" and some others. Everyone is differant, I would suggest going to an AA meeting and seeing what you think of it. I just try to do something everday to work on myself, sometimes that entials working out, going to school, reading. Things that drinking never allowed me to do. Hope this helps.
Heathen
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: La La Land, USA
Posts: 2,567
To me, sobriety = not drinking Merely a change in beverage choice. Recovery = doing what I need to do to make sure I maintain sobriety, and learning how to live a completely new and different life, sober.
Grouch and Brainstorm
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 238
Welcome.
here's my opinion.
"Sobriety" in AA has taken on more than it's literal definition, which is basically "abstinence from drugs and alcohol." I believe that people use the word "sobriety" to describe a state of being comfortably abstinent, not white-knuckling it and feeling the constant urge to use or drink.
"Recovery" in AA is a spiritual awakening, or a personality change. The process to recover is the 12 steps (this is the AA program; others may feel there are other ways to recover).
Putting the words to the side, I suspect what you are getting at is the difference between "not drinking" and "recovering." There are many who feel that "not drinking" is the only thing that matters, because it was the thing that was ruining our lives. Whatever you need to do to get through "one day at a time," the thinking goes, you do it. Or, "If you didn't drink today, you're a winner." Many feel and have experienced that over time, abstinence yields to peace and sobriety, through the simple absence of alcohol or drugs in their lives.
Actual recovery in AA means doing the 12 steps to have a personality change sufficient to relieve us. The theory here is that alcholism is a chronic, hopeless condition, and that without some sort of spiritual shift, the alcholic will drink again. By doing the 12 steps, the thinking goes, you will build a relationship with a higher power of you understanding who will relieve you of the obsession to drink and use.
Here's another way to think about it:
here's my opinion.
"Sobriety" in AA has taken on more than it's literal definition, which is basically "abstinence from drugs and alcohol." I believe that people use the word "sobriety" to describe a state of being comfortably abstinent, not white-knuckling it and feeling the constant urge to use or drink.
"Recovery" in AA is a spiritual awakening, or a personality change. The process to recover is the 12 steps (this is the AA program; others may feel there are other ways to recover).
Putting the words to the side, I suspect what you are getting at is the difference between "not drinking" and "recovering." There are many who feel that "not drinking" is the only thing that matters, because it was the thing that was ruining our lives. Whatever you need to do to get through "one day at a time," the thinking goes, you do it. Or, "If you didn't drink today, you're a winner." Many feel and have experienced that over time, abstinence yields to peace and sobriety, through the simple absence of alcohol or drugs in their lives.
Actual recovery in AA means doing the 12 steps to have a personality change sufficient to relieve us. The theory here is that alcholism is a chronic, hopeless condition, and that without some sort of spiritual shift, the alcholic will drink again. By doing the 12 steps, the thinking goes, you will build a relationship with a higher power of you understanding who will relieve you of the obsession to drink and use.
Here's another way to think about it:
When I stopped drinking I was abstinent. As things got better and I got comfortable with my life, I felt sober. When I went through the process of recovery, I stopped wanting to drink.
Just my take.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 273
Sobriety is not being drunk. Recovery is getting your life in order and dealing with the issues that you'd used alcohol to run from. They come hand in hand, unless you find a new thing to escape from reality (which is almost as bad as being an alcoholic).
AA is a personal decision I think. I don't think it's necessary at all, it's just something people do. What's necessary is that you're being who you want to be, and whatever method you invent to get there is just as good as any popular program.
To elaborate on the sobriety/recovery thing... Imagine a man who drank because he didn't like listening to his spouse. If this man stops drinking, he is sober, but if he finds a new way to ignore his spouse, he hasn't really recovered, has he? At least, if you were a third person observing him, you wouldn't say so. Drinking is a bad solution to a difficult problem. Recovery is tackling the difficult problem so you don't need bad solutions anymore.
AA is a personal decision I think. I don't think it's necessary at all, it's just something people do. What's necessary is that you're being who you want to be, and whatever method you invent to get there is just as good as any popular program.
To elaborate on the sobriety/recovery thing... Imagine a man who drank because he didn't like listening to his spouse. If this man stops drinking, he is sober, but if he finds a new way to ignore his spouse, he hasn't really recovered, has he? At least, if you were a third person observing him, you wouldn't say so. Drinking is a bad solution to a difficult problem. Recovery is tackling the difficult problem so you don't need bad solutions anymore.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: nj
Posts: 541
"Sobriety - freedom from alcohol-- through the teaching and practice of the Twelve Steps, is the sole purpose of an AA group. "
That's the AA definition. I see no meaningful difference between sobriety and recovery in that context.
That's the AA definition. I see no meaningful difference between sobriety and recovery in that context.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome Meltdown! Congratulations on making the decision to get sober! :ghug3
You have a good question and you'll probably find a number of answers to it, all slightly different. My own feeling is that recovery is a process of learning to live life again without alcohol/drugs (or whatever the addiction might be) which obviously begins with getting sober in the case of alcoholic. The process is ongoing (hence "recoverY" instead of "recoverED").
For me, recovery and staying sober are synonymous. I say this because if someone is not drinking, they are somewhere in the recovery process. Also, I feel that there are substantial differences in spiritual beliefs, treatment options, personalites, and daily maintenance. The AA philosphy works, I believe, but I don't feel anyone should be judged by those standards alone.
so that's just one more opionion.....
Hope you'll keep posting and reading. This is a great place!
You have a good question and you'll probably find a number of answers to it, all slightly different. My own feeling is that recovery is a process of learning to live life again without alcohol/drugs (or whatever the addiction might be) which obviously begins with getting sober in the case of alcoholic. The process is ongoing (hence "recoverY" instead of "recoverED").
For me, recovery and staying sober are synonymous. I say this because if someone is not drinking, they are somewhere in the recovery process. Also, I feel that there are substantial differences in spiritual beliefs, treatment options, personalites, and daily maintenance. The AA philosphy works, I believe, but I don't feel anyone should be judged by those standards alone.
so that's just one more opionion.....
Hope you'll keep posting and reading. This is a great place!
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Akron OH
Posts: 57
Sobriety - The state of being sober; not under the influence of alcohol(or drugs).
Recovery - The process of combating an addiction(to alcohol, drugs, etc.).
There are many different paths to recovery, any group that tells you that their way is the only way is unequivocally and demonstrably wrong. I would also be wary of any definition of recovery that is specific to any one group and excludes others.
Being sober is pretty useless as a metric for how well a person is doing(in the darkest depths of my drinking I still was sober every day for some period of time), that is why we all talk about recovery instead.
Recovery - The process of combating an addiction(to alcohol, drugs, etc.).
There are many different paths to recovery, any group that tells you that their way is the only way is unequivocally and demonstrably wrong. I would also be wary of any definition of recovery that is specific to any one group and excludes others.
Being sober is pretty useless as a metric for how well a person is doing(in the darkest depths of my drinking I still was sober every day for some period of time), that is why we all talk about recovery instead.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by Meltdown 
What does recovery get you that sobriety doesn't?
If you stop drinkin and feel as if you are suffering as a result of it, sooner or later you may feel sobriety is not worth having. The goal of recovery is to put an end to all the suffering associated with not drinkin.
The real benefit of using a spiritual based recovery program in place of a managed abstinence program is to gain the peace of mind, joy and sense of purpose that goes along with true recovery.
In short, sobriety (managed abstinence) is an "end of drinkin progam. Recovery is an "end of suffering program."
Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Dallas, Tx
Posts: 2,405
Sobriety to me means just not drinking- heck I used to be sober at least 3 days a week but I was still drunk the other 4. Recovery is an ongoing process as I learn to live life w/o alcohol. The first few months I didn't drink I was just sober it wasn't until I started to work on myself (pray, self analysis/reading recovery literature), apply the 12 step principles (I never did any formal program but I adapted the 12 steps to suit me), and studied the bible, that I started to recover.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: LaCrosse, WI
Posts: 26
I was a dry drunk for 5 years..........Life was good but my attitude sucked.....My way or the highway cause I was sober...........That is Sobrity to me......The Recovery part is changing the way you think while being sober and living by good principals.........That is my take on it.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Poconos PA
Posts: 1,544
All great answers, I enjoyed reading them. I am slowly learning the skill of recovery, and I do believe it is something you acquire through the practice of abstinence. The longer I train my thought process to have a preference to not drink the more I feel in recovery.
I agree that being sober is simply not drinking but recovery is a whole new way of thinking.
The acquired skill: train the brain
I agree that being sober is simply not drinking but recovery is a whole new way of thinking.
The acquired skill: train the brain
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Hmmm....
structured programs aside.....I've always felt my life is a success
as long as I don't drink and strive to do The Golden Rule daily.
When I began working my formal AA Steps...I felt a
shift in perception....from often shakey sobriety
into solid recovery.
Wishing everyone finds their joy!
Welcome Meltdown...
Thank you for joining our recovery community
structured programs aside.....I've always felt my life is a success
as long as I don't drink and strive to do The Golden Rule daily.
When I began working my formal AA Steps...I felt a
shift in perception....from often shakey sobriety
into solid recovery.
Wishing everyone finds their joy!
Welcome Meltdown...
Thank you for joining our recovery community
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: massachusetts
Posts: 2,216
Hi Meltdown and I'll add my welcome to SR!
I'll echo what Dee said...sobriety is not drinking. Recovery is being happy about it! IMHO, it's a difference in attitude. Recovery is an ongoing process and each day, I learn something new. I have joy and enthusiasm, I am not a slave to my addiction any longer. I have personal integrity today and no longer lie to my loved ones. I willingly participate in life, I no longer trudge through it. I can hold my head up with dignity, I no longer hang my head in shame.
I don't resent not drinking. I feel better than I ever have before.
Putting down the drink is the first step (sobriety). Learning to live is the next (recovery).
I'll echo what Dee said...sobriety is not drinking. Recovery is being happy about it! IMHO, it's a difference in attitude. Recovery is an ongoing process and each day, I learn something new. I have joy and enthusiasm, I am not a slave to my addiction any longer. I have personal integrity today and no longer lie to my loved ones. I willingly participate in life, I no longer trudge through it. I can hold my head up with dignity, I no longer hang my head in shame.
I don't resent not drinking. I feel better than I ever have before.
Putting down the drink is the first step (sobriety). Learning to live is the next (recovery).
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 45
I don't think people need a D&A program or 12 step program in order to be in recovery (though they may need such programs to attain abstinence). It's possible, for example, to find recovery in one's church through prayer and fellowship and being able to confess one's weaknesses to someone who cares. The principles of the 12 steps are found within the teachings of Christianity (as well as many of the other faith traditions) and are not unique to AA. Recovery can also be found in meditation, or simply by focusing on other people and doing good in the world. I think that even without a "program of recovery," if a person remains abstinent long enough, the physical and psychological cravings subside as the brain heals. I would never regard someone who's able to maintain abstinence without a formal program of recovery as a "dry drunk," as I've sometimes heard them called. I get a knee-jerk negative reaction sometimes when people who are in recovery programs put down people who are "merely" abstinent.
Grouch and Brainstorm
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 238
Originally Posted by JosetteCollins
I don't think people need a D&A program or 12 step program in order to be in recovery (though they may need such programs to attain abstinence). It's possible, for example, to find recovery in one's church through prayer and fellowship and being able to confess one's weaknesses to someone who cares. The principles of the 12 steps are found within the teachings of Christianity (as well as many of the other faith traditions) and are not unique to AA. Recovery can also be found in meditation, or simply by focusing on other people and doing good in the world. I think that even without a "program of recovery," if a person remains abstinent long enough, the physical and psychological cravings subside as the brain heals. I would never regard someone who's able to maintain abstinence without a formal program of recovery as a "dry drunk," as I've sometimes heard them called. I get a knee-jerk negative reaction sometimes when people who are in recovery programs put down people who are "merely" abstinent.
if a person remains abstinent long enough, the physical and psychological cravings subside as the brain heals.
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