zbear23

Hi Rob. I offer such a generalized description for the same reason as addiction is "generalized" as a "disease." Granted, different drug addictions and process addictions present unique situations, but regardless of the flavor, ice cream is still ice cream...it all melts in the heat.

I don't know of anyone whose behavior is not motivated by seeking pleasure and avoiding pain. It is simply a psychological truism, even when we regard pain as pleasure. Everything I do has a purpose, whether or not I'm mindful of it, and generally speaking it is to make me feel good rather than bad. I depended on "stuff" to make me feel good, or to take away the bad feelings.

Ideally....we are each the captains of our own ships....having the power (if not the inclination) to self regulate our feelings. Nothing and nobody is responsible for my emotional choices. I don't blame others for how I feel. But if I'm using outside stuff to manipulate inside feelings, that is exactly what I'm doing. "My disease made me do it."

Granted, the physical/biochemical effects of addictions, including process dependencies, seriously effect/impair our thinking. But after a period of abstinence, our neuropathways become rewired and our thinking improves. However, if we continue to depend on outside influences to regulate our feelings, then we will usually simply substitute one addictiion for another.

Witness those who stop using one drug only to pick up another....or become obsessed with work, relationships, food, etc. All of these dependencies are "escapes" from a self we've become convinced is unlovable, unworthy...loathsome. As an addict, my aim was to run away from myself. In recovery, my aim is to explore and express myself...and the motivating force for all dependencies is fear: if I'm not who I've been pretending to be....who am I? OMG....I don't know. It may be awful!

Truly,,,,depending on being defined by my surroundings, by the people, places and things that I allow to control me, make me not only an addict, but a victim. Powerless in the extreme.

I also believe the solution is spiritual....the only solution to the fear that drives dependencies is love...that unifying universal force that I like to think of as my HP.

blessings
zenbear

GettingStronger2

I really appreciate all of your thoughts. And, believe it or not, I didn't even realize what I was typing when I used the phrase "weigh in!" Silly me.

i agree with the spiritual aspect. . .as far as my drinking is concerned. Reconnecting with God has removed my compulsion to drink. At least the psychological aspects. I do believe alcoholism is a disease, and I have had one very intense physical craving (in the first 2 weeks). Because the obsession to drink had been removed, I was able to deal with that.

The anorexia, though, is not as easy a nut to crack for me. Although I have not been a practicing anorexic for a long time, the thoughts are always, always there. It makes no difference where I am spiritually. And I can see the relationship between b/p cycles and drinking/addicitons easier than I can with the restriction. Perhaps that is why bulimics are more likely to become alcoholics than anorexics. Maybe there is no connection for me. . .I am just fortunate to have two major issues that could potentially kill me. Its okay, we all have to deal with what life gives us, and I am growing again for the first time in a long time.

rws -- yes, I did see the stat on Intervention. I wish I knew more about where they got it and the facts behind it. I am doing research. . .

Again, thank you all, and I would still appreciate any and all thoughts and opinions you have to offer.

loveon2legs

Great question, and one that I have thought of too!!
I have always battled my weight..when I was a teenager I was bulimic and then not eat much at all, although I never "looked" anorexic... I do think that addictions and eating disorders come hand in hand.....I still battle my weight issues, but I am not obsessed as I once was in fact I enjoyed a lovely sundae last night from DQ!!

DayTrader

Perhaps it's the "spiritual malady" that's the true root cause of all these things?

RobbyRobot

Thanks zenbear. I hear you. We are captians of our own ship, yes. As for the outside whatever being used to manipulate inside feelings, well, that is just how reality works for us humans. Its a real experience gateway and not in itself a problem, imo. We do live in a physical world. We do interact natually with our world. Our insides of course also works on our insides and as well can manipulate outside issues too obvisously. What happens after that is a different deal. The communications between our internal and our external whatevers are required and continuing to develop both individually and as our total humanity around the globe. Better days can be and are ahead. The glass is half-full from where I'm coming from.

So we don't agree on how it works addiction/recovery/sobriety/interactions but we do agree on the elements of what is involved it seems, just we have our own ships to captain in this as well.

Thanks for getting back to me. Cheers!

Rob.

Pagekeeper

My eating disorder wasn't an easy nut for me to crack either. In fact, I couldn't crack it. I needed a power greater than myself. Perhaps that's the problem here--you're still holding onto self-will concerning your anorexia. I can relate. I didn't want to surrender my eating disorder either.

The "thoughts" are your obsession. The "restriction" is the unhealthy practice.

For alcoholics, the obsession is to drink and the unhealthy practice is drinking and trying to control it.

Sorry, but I'll have to strongly disagree with this. Centered and healthy people do NOT intentionally starve themselves. They are not constantly plagued by an obsession to be thinner at the cost of their health and life.

(Added: Some people do "fast" for spiritual reasons, but the goal of a fast is to get closer to God, not to lose weight.)

Consider the 7 deadly sins and how they play a role in your eating disorder: wrath, greed, sloth, pride, lust, envy, and gluttony.

I can tell you how each played a role in mine:

wrath--It's the media's fault. All the skinny models and movie stars. They've made me this way. I'll show them.

greed--I want all the attention. I want people to comment on my weight. i like being called too thin. It makes me feel good to be the smallest of my friends.

sloth--I don't want to do the work to be fit and healthy. Diet and exercise take too much discipline.

pride--I get my self-esteem from a number on the scale each morning. That number determines how I feel about myself.

lust--I want attention from the opposite sex. I want them to find me attractive. I get my sexual excitement from others being attracted to me.

envy--I want this woman's legs, that woman's stomach, this woman's chest, that woman's backside. I want to look like her or her or her.

gluttony--binging and purging. over-exercising. diuretics. laxatives.

Just something for you to consider. I am by no means suggesting the role of the 7 deadly sins in my eating disorder are like yours.

Wilde10

Page...
Do not know if your posts have the same impact on everybody. But they do hit a big one where I am. Difficult to swallow but very well explained.
Thank you