soberdude70

I've been here before with months of sobriety at a time. Right now I'm working on day 6. I had 6 months from July to January last year, which felt very good. Good concentration, lost weight, happier. Since then the most I've strung together is a couple weeks at a time. I've been failing because I pick up the beer again trying to drink moderately (3-4 drinks). Which works for a couple days, maybe a week, then it's back to drinking daily with at least 1-2 good binges of 8+. That 6 months of sobriety occurred during the start of a new job when I was scared to death that drinking would screw me over, but then I got more comfortable, less worried, and I started drinking again. Huge mistake.

All the beer is not good for my weight, but the interesting thing is that even after a night of drinking only a couple beers, my appetite is voracious. It feels like the alcohol triggers something in my head and I absolutely cannot control myself around food. It's not the typical "I'm hungover lets eat 3 sausage mcmuffins for breakfast" feeling. I don't feel hungover at all, just very hungry.

I also feel like I'm drinking to treat my depression.

Had a small gathering of friends over to my place last night for video games, and a few of them brought beer, which is normal, because they don't know I'm a drunk. I didn't drink, and neither did a good portion of the folks who came over. But when my friends left, they didn't take their extra beer. The temptation to drink was floating in and out of my head for about a half hour after they left. Then I poured the beer down the sink. Went to bed and slept peacefully all night.

Toronto68

That's great. You must have thought that was a very cool thing to do when you got rid of it - and then slept and went on with life.

TorontoGuy28

Hmmmm..sounds a lot like what I was doing.

Get to some AA meetings, keep going to different ones until you find a one that you feel most comfortable at..

Talk to your doctor as well, make sure your liver is healthy and see what he/she thinks.. I did a 10 week outpatient rehab program (2 hours per week, after work).. It was awesome, learned lots.

Good luck !

CarolD

Welcome back to SR.....

Hmm.... I too seeing your doctor is a good idea.
Depression is often treatable.
Hope you will find answers...all my best......

SASA

I believe we will succeed, we just need to try until we can stay sober. It is all about th journey and what we will learn from it. In the end we will succeed and once we do we will really apreciate it,

zbear23

I sought (and found) comfort in my drinking, at least until the cost became too dear and the negative consequences mounted up. Have you considered that the notion of "comfort food" is pretty common? Perhaps you are substituting food for the alcohol. We DO tend to seek diligently for comfort (relief) wherever we may find it.<G> Some other common substututes are relationships, sex, work, the internet, pornography, gambling, excitement (adrenaline) and anger (also adrenaline).

blessings
zenbear

artsoul

Good for you for pouring the rest of the beer out. It would have been really hard for me to have that kind of get-together after 6 days. You made it , though, and I'm sure it felt good to wake up without a hangover.

I had a huge appetite after I got sober this time. I wonder if it's from our body getting used to all the sugar we pour into it and when we stop, our blood sugar takes a while to get back to normal. We also create vitamin deficiencies when we drink a lot.

I had to give up the idea that I could control my drinking, too. I had the exact same results you did. I'm so glad I gave up - Now,I can't imagine what was so important about moderate drinking, anyway.......

LexieCat

Yeah, I'd say the only downside of sobriety, for me, has been the weight gain. I barely ate while I was drinking, and gained 20 pounds in two years after getting sober (after losing 60 pounds over fifteen years ago). I still have a pretty unhealthy diet and I'm way too sedentary. Those things will have to change, but I wouldn't trade my sobriety for a size 8.

TexasNative

That's funny. I caught myself yesterday stuffing Doritos in my mouth as many as would fit at once and washing it down with a 44oz Pepsi. I said well guess what, I'd rather eat 5 of these bags of Doritos and slam a whole 2 liter of soda than get drunk/go back to hell/blow my 2.5 weeks of sobriety and start all over!