I just stopped drinking
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Chicago
Posts: 12
I just stopped drinking
Everything bad in my life stemmed from me drinking. After last night I have decided to stop!!!! Stop wasting money.... stop feeling like crap the next day.... stop doing stupid crap when Im drinking... stop all of that nonsense!
Im getting damn close to 40 and I dont need this crap anymore!
But I might need your guys help. Not sure.
Im getting damn close to 40 and I dont need this crap anymore!
But I might need your guys help. Not sure.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome JF! (I don't want to call you Jerkface, that just sounds so mean!)
Good for you for wanting to stop drinking. Alcohol really does "suck." It creates so many problems for us and will kill us if we let it.
I found that I couldn't stay sober very long without support, so I think it's great that a place like this exists. I check in every day and it's helped me to not pick up a drink for over 2 months. Keep reading and posting, and take it a day at a time. You'll feel so much better and get stronger as you get through the first few days.
Also, see a doctor if you having withdrawals, OK?
Good for you for wanting to stop drinking. Alcohol really does "suck." It creates so many problems for us and will kill us if we let it.
I found that I couldn't stay sober very long without support, so I think it's great that a place like this exists. I check in every day and it's helped me to not pick up a drink for over 2 months. Keep reading and posting, and take it a day at a time. You'll feel so much better and get stronger as you get through the first few days.
Also, see a doctor if you having withdrawals, OK?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Chicago
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by artsoul 
Welcome JF! (I don't want to call you Jerkface, that just sounds so mean!)
Good for you for wanting to stop drinking. Alcohol really does "suck." It creates so many problems for us and will kill us if we let it.
I found that I couldn't stay sober very long without support, so I think it's great that a place like this exists. I check in every day and it's helped me to not pick up a drink for over 2 months. Keep reading and posting, and take it a day at a time. You'll feel so much better and get stronger as you get through the first few days.
Also, see a doctor if you having withdrawals, OK?
Good for you for wanting to stop drinking. Alcohol really does "suck." It creates so many problems for us and will kill us if we let it.
I found that I couldn't stay sober very long without support, so I think it's great that a place like this exists. I check in every day and it's helped me to not pick up a drink for over 2 months. Keep reading and posting, and take it a day at a time. You'll feel so much better and get stronger as you get through the first few days.
Also, see a doctor if you having withdrawals, OK?
Thanks for the welcome!!!
I actually dont drink every day. I drink every 4 days - week. Its just that I get hammered when I do and I just dont think of rational things is all.
But I get so damn borred on the weekends. Im just going to have to become UN-borred somehow.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
Welcome to the SR family JF!
I'm glad you've decided to stop drinking before it gets any worse... and it WILL get worse if you keep drinking. there's lots of support and good info here. 
I'm glad you've decided to stop drinking before it gets any worse... and it WILL get worse if you keep drinking. there's lots of support and good info here. SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Yeah, boredom was a big trigger for me, too. And the weekends are the hardest for everyone, so you're not alone. Maybe you could start a list of some things you might want to do to fill the time. It feels weird at first, I know, but I found that I'm slowly figuring it out. Be patient with yourself - every day that you don't drink will help you get stronger and feel better about taking your life back!
p.s. I think everyone's watching the World Cup right now, but I know you'll get a lot more responses later. Hang in there!!
p.s. I think everyone's watching the World Cup right now, but I know you'll get a lot more responses later. Hang in there!!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Chicago
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by artsoul
Yeah, boredom was a big trigger for me, too. And the weekends are the hardest for everyone, so you're not alone. Maybe you could start a list of some things you might want to do to fill the time. It feels weird at first, I know, but I found that I'm slowly figuring it out. Be patient with yourself - every day that you don't drink will help you get stronger and feel better about taking your life back!
p.s. I think everyone's watching the World Cup right now, but I know you'll get a lot more responses later. Hang in there!!
p.s. I think everyone's watching the World Cup right now, but I know you'll get a lot more responses later. Hang in there!!
Yeah Im just so damn tired of wasting my days and money. And I NEEEEEEEEEVER want to not be in control again!
Thing is..... I love cooking... and I enjoy watching teh Food Network.... but those clowns are always boozing it up on those shows! I hate when they ooggggle over booze.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Food is always a good distraction for me, haha! 
(Actually, it's a good thing to eat a little something when we're having a craving - it really helps)
I like the Food Channel, too. Especially the competition shows. I get a big kick out of Chopped and Gordon Ramsey. Don't think I'd want to meet him in a dark kitchen....... I know what you mean about the alcohol always showing up. My sister's a gourmet cook and she became an alcohol drinking most of the wine she got to use in her recipes. Yikes.
I'm finding that I like learning about computers. It's very frustrating at first (to say the least), but I enjoy being able to work with photos, research info, troubleshoot my own issues, etc. I'm now learning how to put up a website of my paintings, something I'd always dreamt about but never seemed to find the time to do.
(Actually, it's a good thing to eat a little something when we're having a craving - it really helps)I like the Food Channel, too. Especially the competition shows. I get a big kick out of Chopped and Gordon Ramsey. Don't think I'd want to meet him in a dark kitchen....... I know what you mean about the alcohol always showing up. My sister's a gourmet cook and she became an alcohol drinking most of the wine she got to use in her recipes. Yikes.
I'm finding that I like learning about computers. It's very frustrating at first (to say the least), but I enjoy being able to work with photos, research info, troubleshoot my own issues, etc. I'm now learning how to put up a website of my paintings, something I'd always dreamt about but never seemed to find the time to do.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Chicago
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by artsoul
Food is always a good distraction for me, haha! (Actually, it's a good thing to eat a little something when we're having a craving - it really helps)
I like the Food Channel, too. Especially the competition shows. I get a big kick out of Chopped and Gordon Ramsey. Don't think I'd want to meet him in a dark kitchen....... I know what you mean about the alcohol always showing up. My sister's a gourmet cook and she became an alcohol drinking most of the wine she got to use in her recipes. Yikes.
I'm finding that I like learning about computers. It's very frustrating at first (to say the least), but I enjoy being able to work with photos, research info, troubleshoot my own issues, etc. I'm now learning how to put up a website of my paintings, something I'd always dreamt about but never seemed to find the time to do.
(Actually, it's a good thing to eat a little something when we're having a craving - it really helps)I like the Food Channel, too. Especially the competition shows. I get a big kick out of Chopped and Gordon Ramsey. Don't think I'd want to meet him in a dark kitchen....... I know what you mean about the alcohol always showing up. My sister's a gourmet cook and she became an alcohol drinking most of the wine she got to use in her recipes. Yikes.
I'm finding that I like learning about computers. It's very frustrating at first (to say the least), but I enjoy being able to work with photos, research info, troubleshoot my own issues, etc. I'm now learning how to put up a website of my paintings, something I'd always dreamt about but never seemed to find the time to do.
RIght now Im out of a job. And my unemployment is ending soon and the damn republicans are voting against an extension.
Ive been on it for 6 months and Im scared to death about not having ANY income at all!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Eastern USA
Posts: 38
Hi, and welcome! You have the right attitude. People here always say "they are sick and tired of being sick and tired" and thats how I feel too. Take some time and go to AA in your town, meet some people, get support and who knows, maybe they will know someone who needs a worker. try it at least! Good luck to ya, and keep posting and reading!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Bethlehem, PA
Posts: 84
Welcome to SR.
I hope I don't upset you our very first interaction with a little food for thought. I learned this thirty years ago and it has really stuck with me.
If you are bor-ed you are probably bor-ing.
Really all that means imo is to get to know yourself! None of us is boring if we open up a bit, branch out, express ourselves, take a risk, have an adventure, go out on a limb. You know. Alcohol does not make you less boring, I can assure you of that!!
Best wishes in your resolve.
I hope I don't upset you our very first interaction with a little food for thought. I learned this thirty years ago and it has really stuck with me.
If you are bor-ed you are probably bor-ing.
Really all that means imo is to get to know yourself! None of us is boring if we open up a bit, branch out, express ourselves, take a risk, have an adventure, go out on a limb. You know. Alcohol does not make you less boring, I can assure you of that!!
Best wishes in your resolve.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Chicago
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by pongo
Welcome to SR.
I hope I don't upset you our very first interaction with a little food for thought. I learned this thirty years ago and it has really stuck with me.
If you are bor-ed you are probably bor-ing.
Really all that means imo is to get to know yourself! None of us is boring if we open up a bit, branch out, express ourselves, take a risk, have an adventure, go out on a limb. You know. Alcohol does not make you less boring, I can assure you of that!!
Best wishes in your resolve.
I hope I don't upset you our very first interaction with a little food for thought. I learned this thirty years ago and it has really stuck with me.
If you are bor-ed you are probably bor-ing.
Really all that means imo is to get to know yourself! None of us is boring if we open up a bit, branch out, express ourselves, take a risk, have an adventure, go out on a limb. You know. Alcohol does not make you less boring, I can assure you of that!!
Best wishes in your resolve.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Merritt Island, Fl
Posts: 1,164
Originally Posted by Jerkface
Everything bad in my life stemmed from me drinking. After last night I have decided to stop!!!! Stop wasting money.... stop feeling like crap the next day.... stop doing stupid crap when Im drinking... stop all of that nonsense!
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Chicago
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by stugotz
Very good motivation to stop drinking, but not enough to stay stopped. Thats a whole different ballgame.
Well how do you stay stopped? I wont be attending any AA classes. I tried a few years ago and it was a horrible experience. It acutally made me WANT to drink. Very depressing place. Everyone drinking horrible coffee and smoking ciggarettes and the moderator was rude. Plus they always said some little chant at the end while holding hands.
That does NOT motivate me to not drink. It motivates me that I want nothing to do with AA meetings. I dont need nor want a 12 step thing either. I just want to not drink. And that I feel comes from calling up friends and/or talking to people here online.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Merritt Island, Fl
Posts: 1,164
Originally Posted by Jerkface
Well how do you stay stopped? I wont be attending any AA classes. I tried a few years ago and it was a horrible experience. It acutally made me WANT to drink. Very depressing place. Everyone drinking horrible coffee and smoking ciggarettes and the moderator was rude. Plus they always said some little chant at the end while holding hands.
That does NOT motivate me to not drink. It motivates me that I want nothing to do with AA meetings. I dont need nor want a 12 step thing either. I just want to not drink. And that I feel comes from calling up friends and/or talking to people here online.
That does NOT motivate me to not drink. It motivates me that I want nothing to do with AA meetings. I dont need nor want a 12 step thing either. I just want to not drink. And that I feel comes from calling up friends and/or talking to people here online.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Toronto, ON
Posts: 1,591
Jerkface, I love the name. A little self-criticism doesn't hurt. (A little.)
I was bored and drank a lot of times too, although that wasn't the reason I was doing it. I did it because it superseded everything else as time went on. Unfortunately it started in my 20s and I kept going until I was 41, bored or not. There are ways to deal with the boredom, and every person figures it out in their own way. Being freed of alcohol has an excitement to it on its own, in the sense that you are getting to reacquaint yourself with things you had not done in a long time, like finishing something you started, ha ha.
As far as "I just want to not drink," that is actually a pretty good way to sum up what all the people in the AA meetings want.
I don't know how to answer the question about staying stopped in a brief sentence or two, and it's only a little under 8 months for me anyway. I suppose I would say I do it by remembering how I stopped and what I don't want to return to and monitoring my thoughts that used to lead to alcohol. There's also a happiness in me that I don't know how to explain, which came about after quitting, and I know it's very important to take care of it.
I was bored and drank a lot of times too, although that wasn't the reason I was doing it. I did it because it superseded everything else as time went on. Unfortunately it started in my 20s and I kept going until I was 41, bored or not. There are ways to deal with the boredom, and every person figures it out in their own way. Being freed of alcohol has an excitement to it on its own, in the sense that you are getting to reacquaint yourself with things you had not done in a long time, like finishing something you started, ha ha.
As far as "I just want to not drink," that is actually a pretty good way to sum up what all the people in the AA meetings want.
I don't know how to answer the question about staying stopped in a brief sentence or two, and it's only a little under 8 months for me anyway. I suppose I would say I do it by remembering how I stopped and what I don't want to return to and monitoring my thoughts that used to lead to alcohol. There's also a happiness in me that I don't know how to explain, which came about after quitting, and I know it's very important to take care of it.
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Chicago
Posts: 12
Thank you both for some VERRRRRY good insight. Stugots I never really thought of it that way. My drinking excelled now that things are more and more stressful when congress is not passing the extension for unemployment. I havent even gotten a damn interview in 3 months 
So Im just..... very very stressed. And when Im like that I want to do something pleasurable that takes my mind off the problem. I MUST ... MUST stop doing that!!! Im training my brain to reach for an artificial substance and that is NOT good at all.
Oh dear.... this sucks.
What worse is my short term memory is really poor and I dont know if its related to the drinking or other factors in my life. I dont do illegal drugs at all. In fact I loathe them.
Im just darn happy you folks are out there.
So Im just..... very very stressed. And when Im like that I want to do something pleasurable that takes my mind off the problem. I MUST ... MUST stop doing that!!! Im training my brain to reach for an artificial substance and that is NOT good at all.
Oh dear.... this sucks.
What worse is my short term memory is really poor and I dont know if its related to the drinking or other factors in my life. I dont do illegal drugs at all. In fact I loathe them.
Im just darn happy you folks are out there.
The truth shall set you free
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: United States
Posts: 5,267
Excerpts from the book Living Sober
Getting out of the "if" trap
Emotional entanglements with people are not the only way we can get our sobriety dangerously hooked to something extraneous. Some of us have a tendency to put other conditions on our sobriety, without intending to.
One A.A. member says, "We drunks are very 'iffy' people. During our drinking days, we were often full of ifs, as well as liquor. A lot of our daydreams started out, 'If only...' And we were continually saying to ourselves that we wouldn't have gotten drunk if something or other hadn't happened, or that we wouldn't have any drinking problem at all if only... :'
We all followed up that last "if" with our own explanations (excuses?) for our drinking. Each of us thought: I wouldn't be drinking this way...
If it wasn't for my wife (or husband or lover)..., if I just had more money and not so many debts... if it wasn't for all these family problems... if I wasn't under so much pressure... if I had a better job or a better place to live... if people understood me... if the state of the world wasn't so lousy..., if human beings were kinder, more considerate, more honest . . . if everybody else didn't expect me to drink... if it wasn't for the war (any war)..., and on and on and on.
Those ifs we cannot afford. We have to. stay sober no matter how life treats us, no matter whether nonalcoholics appreciate our sobriety or not. We have to keep our sobriety independent of everything else, not entangled with any people, and not hedged in by any possible copouts or conditions.
Over and over, we have found we cannot stay sober long just for the sake of wife, husband, children, lover, parents other relative, or friend, nor for the sake of a job, nor to please a boss (or doctor or judge or creditor) not for anyone other than ourselves.
Tying up our sobriety to any person (even another recovered alcoholic) or to any circumstance is foolish and dangerous. When we think, "I'll stay sober if..." or "I won't drink because of...' (fill in any circumstance other than our own desire to be well, for health's own sake), we unwittingly set ourselves up to drink when the condition or person or circumstance changes. And any of these may change at any moment.
Independent, unaffiliated with anything else, our sobriety can grow strong enough to enable us to cope with anything and everybody.' And, as you'll see, we start liking that feeling, too.
TB
Getting out of the "if" trap
Emotional entanglements with people are not the only way we can get our sobriety dangerously hooked to something extraneous. Some of us have a tendency to put other conditions on our sobriety, without intending to.
One A.A. member says, "We drunks are very 'iffy' people. During our drinking days, we were often full of ifs, as well as liquor. A lot of our daydreams started out, 'If only...' And we were continually saying to ourselves that we wouldn't have gotten drunk if something or other hadn't happened, or that we wouldn't have any drinking problem at all if only... :'
We all followed up that last "if" with our own explanations (excuses?) for our drinking. Each of us thought: I wouldn't be drinking this way...
If it wasn't for my wife (or husband or lover)..., if I just had more money and not so many debts... if it wasn't for all these family problems... if I wasn't under so much pressure... if I had a better job or a better place to live... if people understood me... if the state of the world wasn't so lousy..., if human beings were kinder, more considerate, more honest . . . if everybody else didn't expect me to drink... if it wasn't for the war (any war)..., and on and on and on.
Those ifs we cannot afford. We have to. stay sober no matter how life treats us, no matter whether nonalcoholics appreciate our sobriety or not. We have to keep our sobriety independent of everything else, not entangled with any people, and not hedged in by any possible copouts or conditions.
Over and over, we have found we cannot stay sober long just for the sake of wife, husband, children, lover, parents other relative, or friend, nor for the sake of a job, nor to please a boss (or doctor or judge or creditor) not for anyone other than ourselves.
Tying up our sobriety to any person (even another recovered alcoholic) or to any circumstance is foolish and dangerous. When we think, "I'll stay sober if..." or "I won't drink because of...' (fill in any circumstance other than our own desire to be well, for health's own sake), we unwittingly set ourselves up to drink when the condition or person or circumstance changes. And any of these may change at any moment.
Independent, unaffiliated with anything else, our sobriety can grow strong enough to enable us to cope with anything and everybody.' And, as you'll see, we start liking that feeling, too.
TB
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