BullDog777

I usually wake up pretty happy, ready to start the day.

However, today i'm all twisted around the axle over a VERY vivid drunk dream i had.

Most of my friends growing up were a bunch of criminals and we all would drink and do tons of drugs . So there I was, back with them smoking cheap cigars and slugging moonshine that tasted like fine lighter fluid... It felt like it went on the whole f-ing night.

It was so real, i remembered the taste and the smell.


This was only the second time in sobriety i think i might have had a desire to get plowed....and maybe that's not even the right phrase-

i didn't want to get wasted when i woke up-

bear with me if i ramble for a minute because i'm writing this as fast as i'm feeling it.

in the dream, i knew it was wrong, i knew it would ruin everything and i did it anyway. i woke up feeling disgusted and angry, and needed to get my feelings out. i could taste the cigar and the booze in the dream and it tasted GOOD. i really felt like i was getting drunk and high in the dream.

except there were no consequences in the dream like i know there would be in my life. if i got drunk, i would lose my wife and daughter. i would lose my place to live. i would ruin my health again and it would certainly- this time, end my life.

sigh....


i think i'm gonna go eat some breakfast and hit my heavybag until i can't lift my arms.

thanks for listening.

suki44883

Yeah, those drinking dreams do suck, but the good part is, when you wake up, you realize that it was just a dream and you didn't really drink. They'll eventually go away. I haven't had one in well over a year, so hang in there. It will get better.

loveon2legs

I had one last night..and when I woke up I was surprised to have dreamt it........just shows even after a length of time...it creeps back into us.....

CarolD

Prayer helps me immensley when I am troubled.

sleepie

I've had weird dreams about drinking in the past, after I've attained more sober time- and they are disturbing because sometimes I'd wake up thinking "Oh no!" I've ruined all my sobriety!" Then it would dawn on me that it was all in my head. A heavy bag sounds like a good idea... got an extra?

rws177

I have had the same thing these past months. I'll have a drunk dream and then wake up feeling guilty. Then I realize it was only a dream and feel good that I in fact did not relapse.

DayTrader

Those are the worst..... or the best.... depends upon how you look at them. I haven't had any drinking dreams in the past year or two then BAM..... two of 'em in the past week or 2 weeks. The bad part is I got to see just how easy it was for me (in the dream) to throw it all away and go back to being a selfish/all-about-me/drunk. Both dreams were in present day (just over 3 years sober) and I picked up that half-gallon and chugged away.

On the good side...... it helped motivate me to step my game up. About the time I start gettin' cocky and think "I've got this......" - I'm done. I need to keep "working out" and doing all the maintenance I can do. No way in the F*** I want that guilt back! No way.......