My wife had a stillborn.. CCCCCCRUSHED
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Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 456
Thanks again everybody. They started inducement at 8am yesterday, she delivered at 12:15am today.... It's a sad day, but we'll make it through with the help of God and each other. Thanks again everybody for your support and prayers.
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Join Date: May 2009
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Update.... The cause was chromosonal... either bad sperm, or bad egg (what the Doctor said).... We are having the genetic testing done, but the baby was never right from conception and they were surprised she didn't miscarry earlier...
I'm not going to blame myself, but I know for a fact I was drinking my normal allowance when the baby was conceived (about a liter a day of vodka)... I quit when I found out she was pregnant and had a very short relapse about a month later and have been sober since... She is incredibly strong, and we will be pregnant again before the year is out, sober this time of course.
It is an extreme blessing that God let my wife's body do it's job, because we are both extremely religious and if the baby still had a heartbeat with the major malformities, we would have not terminated unless it threatened her life... So we can only thank God for that...
I'm not going to blame myself, but I know for a fact I was drinking my normal allowance when the baby was conceived (about a liter a day of vodka)... I quit when I found out she was pregnant and had a very short relapse about a month later and have been sober since... She is incredibly strong, and we will be pregnant again before the year is out, sober this time of course.
It is an extreme blessing that God let my wife's body do it's job, because we are both extremely religious and if the baby still had a heartbeat with the major malformities, we would have not terminated unless it threatened her life... So we can only thank God for that...
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
You're being so strong to get through this and look at the positives in it, too. As you said, it may have been for the best, even though the pain is still there. A fresh start may be just the thing and it sounds like you're there! Prayers and hugs......
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: Southern Oregon
Posts: 87
Originally Posted by ImReadyToQuit 
I'm not going to blame myself, but I know for a fact I was drinking my normal allowance when the baby was conceived (about a liter a day of vodka)... I quit when I found out she was pregnant and had a very short relapse about a month later and have been sober since... She is incredibly strong, and we will be pregnant again before the year is out, sober this time of course.
I am so sorry that you both had to go through this. Yes, its good that things happened the way that they did, and that you both have god to lean on in this time.
I am so glad to hear that you are not taking the burden of this upon yourself. After carrying four kids myself... and using up to the point I found I was pregnant... my theory is that during conception and the first trimester (some doctors have confirmed this with me also) there is some level of protection built in for a healthy baby. I do not think you're consumption could have caused chromosonal problems.
It's awesome that you made it through this sober and are determined to change your life. I want to give you kudos on that dude. Draw from this when you feel weak in sobriety.... if you can do this sober, you can do anything sober.
I'm looking forward to the announcement of the beginning of that next baby!!
Lori
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Michigan
Posts: 758
I can't even say that I could begin to understand how that makes you feel, but just know you and your wife have my most sincere sympathy and deepest wishes for your well being in dealing with this. You will be in my prayers for sure tonight.
Steve
Steve
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