Finding reasons to stay sober
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Poconos PA
Posts: 1,544
Finding reasons to stay sober
It has been two days since my last drink. I guess I should mark the calendar again for a new day 1.
I recently read a post by Paulos where he is worried about his brain and it struck a chord with me because it is the same reason I am determined to stay off booze again for good. After a small relapse I ready to try again for good this time. To put it in perspective, I have only drank on a few nights recently and it was a light amount. That said, I am committed to avoiding a full return to heavy drinking because I don't want to jeopardize all I have worked for.
I worked some overtime yesterday to organize some things with my boss. He remarked to me as we were working that I have a good head on my shoulders. I thought to myself at that moment how foolish I would be to continue down that slippery slope of alcoholism. Start daily drinking again, next thing you know I am 12 pack a day and brain fogged every morning for half my shift. Then maybe worse problems with my brain that I haven't even seen yet start affecting my performance at work.
This thought is enough to make me determined to stop for good this time, Throw in all the stories here about cirrhosis and I think I have enough reasons to stop.
I just have to grit my way through the next bout of cravings. As I said in a recent post, my cravings are obsessive thoughts that keep me up at night and dog me all day. I don't currently suffer from them by I suspect they will hit me again some day and I must be prepared this time to avoid temptation.
What got me started again this time was a trip I had to take for work. Meeting with everybody after work for dinner allowed my alcoholic thinking to get the better of me and follow the other drinkers to the bar. What will I do on the next trip I will be required to take I don't yet know. I will cross that bridge when I come to it.
For now, I am starting again with a commitment to myself to stay away from the beer. Just for today, then just for tomorrow and then the next. One day at a time.
I recently read a post by Paulos where he is worried about his brain and it struck a chord with me because it is the same reason I am determined to stay off booze again for good. After a small relapse I ready to try again for good this time. To put it in perspective, I have only drank on a few nights recently and it was a light amount. That said, I am committed to avoiding a full return to heavy drinking because I don't want to jeopardize all I have worked for.
I worked some overtime yesterday to organize some things with my boss. He remarked to me as we were working that I have a good head on my shoulders. I thought to myself at that moment how foolish I would be to continue down that slippery slope of alcoholism. Start daily drinking again, next thing you know I am 12 pack a day and brain fogged every morning for half my shift. Then maybe worse problems with my brain that I haven't even seen yet start affecting my performance at work.
This thought is enough to make me determined to stop for good this time, Throw in all the stories here about cirrhosis and I think I have enough reasons to stop.
I just have to grit my way through the next bout of cravings. As I said in a recent post, my cravings are obsessive thoughts that keep me up at night and dog me all day. I don't currently suffer from them by I suspect they will hit me again some day and I must be prepared this time to avoid temptation.
What got me started again this time was a trip I had to take for work. Meeting with everybody after work for dinner allowed my alcoholic thinking to get the better of me and follow the other drinkers to the bar. What will I do on the next trip I will be required to take I don't yet know. I will cross that bridge when I come to it.
For now, I am starting again with a commitment to myself to stay away from the beer. Just for today, then just for tomorrow and then the next. One day at a time.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,237
I tried the control drinking....was that a foolish thing for me...ended up with a DUI....I know that NO amount of alcohol is safe for me...notta..notta drop... so for the first month, I just stepped back...took inventory and stayed away from places that would kick that alcoholic brain of mine into overdrive....My brain now, 132 days sober is much clearer, and focused..definetely making better decisions...and all my stomach issues..gone...my face cleared up, it's not bloated...and my moods aren't all over the map!
I wish you all the best on your recovery road...it's a journey well worth it!! I promise!!
I wish you all the best on your recovery road...it's a journey well worth it!! I promise!!
Go ask the Multivax
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 2,481
Everything you ever wanted to know about moderated drinking can be found here:
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Alcoholics activist admits to drink-drive killings - Americas, World - The Independent
The founder of a movement that advocates moderate drinking for recovering alcoholics admitted that she killed two people, a father and his daughter, when she drove the wrong way up an American interstate one night in March and ran into their van. Police said she was three times over the legal alcohol content limit.
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You're on the right path Sudz. :-) It sounds like you have no designs on moderation anyway?
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Alcoholics activist admits to drink-drive killings - Americas, World - The Independent
The founder of a movement that advocates moderate drinking for recovering alcoholics admitted that she killed two people, a father and his daughter, when she drove the wrong way up an American interstate one night in March and ran into their van. Police said she was three times over the legal alcohol content limit.
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You're on the right path Sudz. :-) It sounds like you have no designs on moderation anyway?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Poconos PA
Posts: 1,544
Originally Posted by Alizerin 
You're on the right path Sudz. :-) It sounds like you have no designs on moderation anyway?
Yeah, for me what is moderation? Even if I keep the beers to 3 or 4 I feel like the lab rat. You know, the one that keeps running through the maze because it knows it will find cocaine at the end of it. Maybe the rat will just find half of the fix it likes but it will still run the maze because it knows it will find something.
Why run the maze at all then?
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: New Hampshire, USA
Posts: 224
When I read the title of your thread, I was surprised at my own response: I enjoy being sober. And that's after only 34 days and 4 steps. I hear it gets even better, so I'm staying for that. (ODAAT, of course) Heck, I'm looking forward to my second meeting today in a couple of hours. Wouldn't miss it for the world.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,414
Glad you're back on the right road Sudz
There are other ways than just gritting your teeth tho - lots of recovery programmes and counselling avenues out there...I hope you'll at least think about it.
Noone can have too much support.
D
There are other ways than just gritting your teeth tho - lots of recovery programmes and counselling avenues out there...I hope you'll at least think about it.
Noone can have too much support.
D
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