sleepie

I want to be sober. Today was another day one. Eight years of heavy, daily drinking and I am female- so I know what that can mean if I don't stop right now, and forever. I was shocked that my blood tests came back normal last October. I'm 36, so hopefully I'm young enough still that ceasing my intake of elixirs can keep me in a good state of health. I have a bottle of antabuse that I am waiting to hear from my shrink about as far as drug interactions, as I am on an anti depressant. I was feeling good, had three weeks, and blew it. I have reached out to a friend as well. I know he can't do the work, only I can- but the support is nice and I like knowing that someone I can talk to is there.

schem9

Be strong sleepie. Seriously - let's try to make this your last "day one". You can do this. Do it before your health goes South.

Ceres

Hey you. :-)

Hopefully you'll reach out to more than one! The weight of our burden kills us alone. But it's still far too heavy for just one other person. Do you have a circle of recovery friends or phone numbers? It really does wonders to ease the struggle and the accompanying pain.

artsoul

hey sleepie - you had 3 weeks and you can do it again. Remember, you only have to do it for today. Write down why you want/need to get sober and look at it several times a day if you have to (or read some of the old posts on SR - that helped me quite a bit and convinced me this is a life/death matter).

It's maddening, I know. We have a few days or weeks of sobriety and we forget how desperate we were to stop drinking. I have to keep those memories alive right now or my old thoughts and habits will come back automatically. Hang in there!:day6

Dee74

Hey sleepie

I won't rehash what these guys said ^ it's all good stuff - especially the point about getting as much support as you can.

You've gotten sober before so I know you can do this

D

Reubena

Sleepie,

You can do this! Good for you to reach out to a friend.

"One day at a time" really helped me.

Hoping for you

yeahgr8

Like has beensaid do you have a program you will be using? Got a counselor lined up? I wanted to be sober for years but it took action to do so...

I was a bit like i really want to win the lottery...but cant be assed to buy a ticket, wish you some luck:-)

FBL

Don't beat yourself up. I can't count the number of times I vowed to stop, only to pick up again and again. It was a merry-go-round that I rode for nearly 30 years. It finally got to a point where it was impacting my physical and mental health, so I finally decided to just stop. That was just over 11 months ago and it was the best decision I ever made.

totfit

I have never heard of Antabuse being contraindicated with any anti-depressant unless you are treating depression with alcohol. For what its worth Anatbuse was a tool I used many years ago that was an asset when my life turned 180 degrees for the better. Course there was a lot of other work involved, but I have nothing, but postive things to say about Antabuse.

sleepie

Thanks all, I appreciate your comments! I have a counselor who specializes in addiction. I have been seeing her for several months and it took a long time to get the anti depressants because it's state funded care but they made a difference once I finally had them- after a couple months. I think I'm a good client- I hide nothing from her so that she can help me in the best way possible. I called her this weekend and left a message letting her know I'd been drinking (I was NOT inebriated when I called!) and asked about the antabuse. I have been dieting, cut out caffeine and getting more exercise... I think I'm on the right path, there's just one thing I need to STOP doing. Thanks again for taking the time to read and post

smacked

Your meds will work a whole lot better when you stop mixing them with alcohol.. I know mine do!

Toronto68

Sleepie, I'm glad to see you say you want to put a stop to it.