needhelpbutstuk

I posted for the first time on this site a few weeks ago. Made it a few days, then drank again, and so on and so forth for the last few weeks. i was trying to go at this thing alone. i have realized i cant do that. so, a week ago, I sat down with my wife and laid it all on the line. The excessive drinking, hiding spots, whats been going on etc. Since then i havent had a drink in 7 days. today is hopefully #8, although I am scared. We have had a lot going on in our life and stress is at an all time high. Today has been a long day, up early...I am definitely feeling like stopping for some booze...I am trying to resist. Over the weekend was hard not to drink myself stupid, now it is even harder. When will the mental anguish and challenge stop?

Nevertheless

One thing that helped me is to block it out. I know. Your thinking your kidding right?
I told myself "Drinking just isn't an option". I think you are telling yourself."Hmm I could just pull in a liquor store" Block it out. You can't do that.
I'm an alcoholic, I just can't drink. Might as well forget it. It just ain't an option.
Say it over and over till the craving goes away.


If your mind thinks there is a way to get what it wants. It will keep bothering you. Kind of like a little kid throwing a tantrum. Block it out. It just ain't an option.

Hang in there.
Fred

Bard

Don't let it become a obsessive thought what ever you do. Posting and reading here helps but sometimes you have to get up and move around and do something. I realize that was always my worse enemy when it came to drinking was idle time. Nothing to do and have all day to do it, the perfect time to drink. Keep your self busy and force your mind on other things it will go away or at least be a dull roar. Sometimes that dull roar stuck with me all day and I had to wait till finally 1:30am or midnight on Sundays before it was to late to go get anything. Yet when time was up it washed away and feeling of peace followed and the words "I'm glad I didn't cave in" Of course I'm on day 2 right now but I see where I got screwed at. First I gave up coming here seeming as for weeks at a time I didn't think about drinking. But when the thought crept back in, I allowed it to take me didn't even attemp to come here or read literiture or read that note I wrote to myself when I had my last nightmare hangover. And to much listening to hey a few cant hurt you. Well, it will. And you must not let your self come to temptation! You know that more rational side of your head doesn't want it!

Deckard97

Im on day 18 and have not drink since April. Every morning I drink coffee and exercise for two minutes [running in place]. Also I stop watching news and Barak Obama speeches on tv all they do is make me want to drink. Every day that I dont reach for the bottle is another day I am slowly getting back mental and physical health.

Dee74

what are you using for support needhelpbutstuk?
Posting here once in a while is better than nothing, but maybe you need more support to do this?

It's tough I know - I never would have gotten throuigh without the support of people here.

Face to face support too, like AA or SMART, or even counselling, can be good too

Noone need do this alone
D

AcceptingChange

it'll get better, hang in there. there is definitely a period of strong cravings, and it definitely goes away over time. I remember driving in the car with my son, and i'd get hit with these strong cravings, i felt like i couldn't think. i kept shaking my head back and forth, like i could shake it out. It took all my focus to just stay committed and not drink.
but those days are over. i remember how it was, but i'm glad to say i don't get hit with that feeling anymore.
don't give in! don't rationalize, and don't pick up.

CarolD

AA is where I found my fantastic new non drinking life...
We can and do recover.
I so hope you will too.

needhelpbutstuk

going to bed now, I have made it through the night. I cant tell you how much I have been cleaning house, doing laundry, taking walks. I am exhausted from all the "work" but I get to feel good about going to sleep, 8 nights sober and I dont think I have done that in a solid 10 years

ImagineMe

I am on day 17. I am still going through the everynight event at around 8 PM after the kids are in bed where I want a drink. Then I take a few breaths, remind myself that drinking is not an option, remind myself of how I raised my voice at my kids when I was in withdrawl the first week and I don't want to go back there.
That helps big time for me.

rws177

I just tell myself "I will not drink today" and it seems to work for me. Also I think that is really cool that you were up front with your wife about everything. I'm sure she is proud of you for not concealing the problem.

DetroitRock

In my experience, I need to find something to reward myself with if I've had a really productive day or did well on a test or something. Because I'm an expat in a non-western country, the options are really limited to things that don't involve alcohol. Now that the weather is nice, I'm going to try riding my bike when I get the urge and try to explore new areas of the city. I'm usually at my worst when it's the weekend and I've had a successful week.

Anyway, two days down. Just wish I could get some sleep.

smacked

Sounds like you're still going about it alone. I have yet to meet an alcoholic that can recover without help.

Have you considered counseling? meetings? doctor? rehab? outpatient groups?

Norther

Each day, at day 15, my cravings get less strong. I probably get them as often, especially after work when I used to buy my beer, but they don't have the "pull" they did say a week ago. So, yes, I think it does get easier. It sure will get harder if you drink again and have to start all over, if you can.

Peter G

Norther is right. I'm at Day 26 now, something I never for a minute thought was even possible. The cravings really had super-strength up and until around day 16, at which point they just started deflating. They haven't really decreased in frequency (maybe a bit) but they are now steadily losing their "pull power", or "oomph" as it were .

There was one thing I kept reciting/remembering back in my first 2 weeks. Following this one rule really kept me away from drinking my face off when the cravings crept up and began that relentless banging on the inside of my skull.

"At this point in my life, NOTHING IN THE WORLD is more important than my sobriety. Everything else takes second place. Full stop.."

I applied that mantra to my cravings, fights with the wife, stress from my job, aches and pains, e.t.c... It worked thankfully, because I really lived by the rule. If relationships suffered because of it, then so be it. If my work suffered, so be it. And so on.

I guess repeating and feeling the weight of that statement lets me know that I can't allow anything to stand in my way, or I'm as good as dead - and dead I'm no good to anybody.

Gotta admit though, on my 7th day I had some of my worst cravings, and really thought I wouldn't survive. But so far so good by doing it one day at a time, and taking the necessary small steps.

In fact, even if you give in to your craving and decide to drink, make a plan on what store to get your bottle from, pick out your favorite brand of poison, pick the route you will take to the store. Hell, imagine the clothes you'll wear to get that bottle. Then just put it off until tomorrow. I did that somewhere in my first week and you know what? The next day I didn't get a bottle, I wrote a song.

Congrats on 7 days mate, it's really no small feat. Keep reading and posting here, this site is another powerful weapon against succumbing to this insidious illness.

wren

Hang in there with the cravings. I've been having them many days of the week since I've stopped drinking (over a month ago).
They are getting weaker. I'm sure they will for you too.

Anytime I have that craving now, I drink tea, water, juice or coffee.

Krodos

I am 4 1/2 months or so sober now.

I occasionally get a craving one in a while(usually triggered by something).. but I have the mindset now where going and buying some alcohol isn't even a option.. so I do not agonize about going to the liquor store or not, it just passes on its own.

I am proud to say that I did this without AA or anyone elses help(well I did have SR)

betterlate

One thing that helped me early on was simply repeating to myself "drinking will NOT help" over and over again. I knew those words to be true, because I had got to the point where drinking only made me more anxious and depressed. Day 24 here and feeling the pull of EtOH lessen. Not that there won't be challenges ahead, but it feels easier now than, say, ten days ago. I just wanna keep going. If nothing else, I am curious as to what lies ahead. Already I'm noticing positive changes, my life is going a lot smoother, I'm starting to get caught up on some projects and tasks I have wanted to do for a long time and drinking is just going to screw everything up again.

Day eight is great. Day nine will be fine!

least

What I did when I got a craving to drink was to ask myself two questions: one, will drinking improve this situation? and two, do I want to wake up tomorrow feeling like crap again? AFter a few months I now don't even have to ask those questions cause my mind is newly trained to not even 'go there' because drinking is no longer an option.

It does take a while to get to that mental state, I'm coming up on six months, but I've been 'training' myself since day One to not engage with my 'inner alcoholic' when it screams for a drink or ten... And remember, there's nothing so bad that drinking can't make it ten times worse.

needhelpbutstuk

Thanks all for your comments. I have made it to today and this will be my 2nd weekend to go through without a drink. I hope I make it the urge is pretty strong. Lots of "drinking triggers" ie good weather, sit out on the deck and drink some, do some yardwork and drink some etc. but im not going to do it. Binderdonedat, that is a good line to repeat to yourself. I think I might adopt it. The rest of my life has struggled as i learn how to live without booze. I need to learn to accept it for now. I am now 10 days sober...I WILL make it to 11....and 12

Deckard97

No offense.


I am drunk right now.