One week.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 8,614
One week.
I have seven days as of tonight. I recently met a man, who brought laughter and light into my life, hope and fun. He is an alcoholic. At first, I did not know. We drank together, and discussed quitting. Then we quit. He lasted six days, drank again and said some very unkind things to me- after weeks of giving me gifts and treating me sweetly. I was upset, but I have not and will not have a drink. I am never again going to damage myself because of the painful behavior of a man. It's not going to happen. I stuck to my guns, and he is intent on drinking. I have chosen my path. It does not include compromising myself in any way to win or keep the attention of anyone.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Posts: 5
Way to go. That's the toughest thing in the world to do. The first time I got sober a couple of years ago I clung to this terrible relationship for years and years until finally cutting the ties a few months ago. This is my fourth (and final) attempt at sobriety and I feel like it's my first in many ways since that woman is no longer in my life.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Sunny Down Under
Posts: 64
Sleepie, I would highly recommend you report for duty on the Class of April thread! We have a great group of people over there who are extremely supportive of each other. I'm sure you would find it useful. Congrats on 8 days.
New Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Nashville, TN
Posts: 162
Congratulations on not giving in, you should be proud of yourself. He's just upset with himself for giving in..."hurting people hurt people"--don't take it personally. I would stay away though, you definitely do not need anyone trying to drag you down in an uphill process.
I'm new to all of this myself and I have to pick and choose carefully who I can still surround myself with, because in my experience people always try to get you to be on their level and if it's a level of intoxication, "no thank you" is going to be my new best friend phrase.
Best wishes to you and yours
I'm new to all of this myself and I have to pick and choose carefully who I can still surround myself with, because in my experience people always try to get you to be on their level and if it's a level of intoxication, "no thank you" is going to be my new best friend phrase.
Best wishes to you and yours
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 8,614
Thanks, I've been working on this idea of sobriety for a long time and there have been ups and downs- some periods of sobriety and weeks and months and years of inebriation. I tend to be vulnerable and lonely so the first guy who comes along and makes me laugh- I want to stick to him like glue. I learned a very hard lesson this past winter and I told myself it's time to learn from experience. So I am half way through my day 8, and I am going to watch a movie to keep my mind off things... plus I lost three pounds yay!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 8,614
Okay, I was feeling pretty strong the last couple of days and now, day 9 I am so sad and I want to drink, but I won't. But I am just so very sad. I am already on a high dose of anti- depressant for OCD actually. I watched "Scarface" yesterday. I hung out with the roomie to keep my mind off things but today I slept until 1:00 after going to bed at 10:00 pm! I did get up at 6 and apply for a job though. today is really hard. I get a casual email from this guy that hurt me saying he misses me- but he doesn't call, or want to hang out. He just casually tosses an insincere email and I wait for another, or a phone call that never comes. I know I shouldn't think about it. Just saying, today is a rough one. I'm being treated for depression, so it's very hard to handle this when this guy came along and made me laugh, gave me gifts, and then returned to the bottle. Now I regret making friends with anyone. I feel so hurt that I wasn't good enough, and that alcohol wins over me.
New Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Nashville, TN
Posts: 162
I've been there before...constantly looking at your phone, or just being in relationships that seemed soooo good, but really they were only imagined to be good & once you see it for what it really was on both sides you realize it was all wrong. People definitely don't just use and abuse substances they do it to people too & it's extremely selfish.
I got out of a relationship two months ago & I couldn't even imagine getting into another one, especially with what I am going through at the moment. I am really glad it ended because he still drinks, smokes etc. & if it wouldn't have ended then, then it would have ended now. I need this time for myself and to figure out what reconstructive steps I need to take in order to get me closer to a balanced happy lifestyle. I feel lost & depressed too, but I do know that this (sobriety) is a good first step, because you can't think about fixing a problem unless you're willing to face it.
Congrats on applying for a job, that's a great step too. I need to get on that as well!
I hope this day shapes up for you and I also wanted to say congratulations on your 9 days, that's awesome. As far as the depressed & lonely feelings that invade, I have found that focusing on old hobbies or looking into new ones helps a lot in the process of getting through the funk--I've been reading a lot lately & looking into volunteer options.
Stick to it, you're good for it!
I got out of a relationship two months ago & I couldn't even imagine getting into another one, especially with what I am going through at the moment. I am really glad it ended because he still drinks, smokes etc. & if it wouldn't have ended then, then it would have ended now. I need this time for myself and to figure out what reconstructive steps I need to take in order to get me closer to a balanced happy lifestyle. I feel lost & depressed too, but I do know that this (sobriety) is a good first step, because you can't think about fixing a problem unless you're willing to face it.
Congrats on applying for a job, that's a great step too. I need to get on that as well!
I hope this day shapes up for you and I also wanted to say congratulations on your 9 days, that's awesome. As far as the depressed & lonely feelings that invade, I have found that focusing on old hobbies or looking into new ones helps a lot in the process of getting through the funk--I've been reading a lot lately & looking into volunteer options.
Stick to it, you're good for it!
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