Sudz No More

Has it occurred to anyone else here that quitting Alcohol makes us a minority? I mean, everywhere you go you meet people who drink and then drink some more. Maybe they don't have a "Problem" or do they?

A co-worker commented to me today about how she couldn't stop her 6 to 7 beer a day habit and how did I do it? I told her it was tough and that I missed it but I knew I could no longer have it.

When I go on Facebook I notice most of the people there are seen in pictures drinking or commenting on drinking. One in particular struck me last night as he said he couldn't remember driving home the other night. He is over 40 and has been drinking a long time. I have said nothing to any of them that I quit and I don't see any of them in person as I live far from many of my old friends.

I just have been left lately with this feeling of sadness for others who struggle or don't realize they struggle. I most of all however felt something for the first time, Loneliness. It was a strange feeling though, not the kind of Lonely where you are really alone as I do have my wife with me who has always been a teetotaler. Just a surreal feeling of being on the outside looking in.

I also did tell my co-worker that I got over smoking but I don't think I will ever fully get over drinking. It is just too deeply ingrained in the person I have been for the last twenty years.

I am just thankful I have places like here to come and know I am not alone.

Bamboozle

Hey, Sudz.

I'll do that sometimes...pick out the people who I think have a problem.

There are people around you who don't. A lot, actually. We just don't notice them because they aren't vocal about it. The more time that goes by the more you'll see. Keep your head up.

Mark75

Alcoholics are in the minority. Recovered alcoholics are even more in the minority.

Yea, I get that feeling of loneliness... outside looking in... but that passed for me. A lot of that feeling comes from the ubiquitous marketing of alcohol... the cultivation of an image that is... to really be a part of things, well, you have to be a part of that culture... you have to drink beer.

I went out to dinner tonight at a place that really puts the beers and the margaritas and martinis out front. Most of the diners were drinking iced tea, diet coke and the restaurant's cherry limeade.

I imagine they make more money on alcohol. I guess someone has to pay for all the neon signs...

Mark

gravity

If you google the statistics, you will find that MOST people are non-drinkers or moderate drinkers.

I go to concerts, football games, restaurants, "normal" bars (eg. not the kind where everyone is just there to get hammered)....most people are sober or just having a few drinks.

I know that outside looking in feeling. It really is just in your mind. Being a non-drinker is really a non-issue in the grand scheme of things.

Boleo

While the actual numbers are still unknown, the population that "drinks too much" may in fact be much higher than we realize. The numbers that quit for good (lifetime) may also be much lower than we realize.

One of the reason that I did not seek help in my final drinking years of drinking was because I simply believed there was no solution for me. I would not admit to anyone that I was an alcoholic because I would not admit to myself that I was hopeless. I sometimes wonder if people like me ever get diagnosed as alcoholics?

It has been estimated that 10% of the population is alcoholic and that only about 5% of those who do try to quit succeed for a lifetime. If those numbers are valid, then it means that only 0.5% of the population is "recovered" from alcoholism.

scaredykat

I personally don't pay attention to statistics. I don't care much for them.

But I can relate to the feelings of loneliness and being on the outside looking in.

Today it's not like that for me. For one thing i don't go to bars or restaurants that serve booze unless I absolutely have to be there. I was also taught that i have a choice and can leave if i feel uncomfortable in those situations. I recently was at a wedding last fall and had to leave. It was too hard being there with everyone drinking and dancing and the loud music. It brought back old memories of drinking. I'm so glad I have choices today, and I choose sobriety.

shaun00

i felt lonely and on the ouside looking because i was an aggresive drunk....so the fact is it was true....people avoided me as if i has swine flu.

not so today...i have joined life with a new perception.....and have recovered from a hopeless state of me ..me....and more me......oh poooor me.

Stasitics....i dont know..........if i grab a newcomer and share a message of hope maybe..just maybe ill have the privlege of watching god at work.

Wolfchild

i feel that using labels somewhat compares ourselves to other people in an unhealthy way. It focuses the attention on our differences instead of our similarities. The people who are doing this in relation to the people who are doing that, sort of divides humanity into separate categories. It is wise to use sound judgment when choosing to associate ourselves with various individuals, particular places, & certain things. Practicing common sense in all our affairs benefits us and society at large. i understand your seeing things like this and hope that you will seek guidance from the God of your understanding about it. You may be able to help more people than you think you can, eh?

findingout

I used to belong to a minority of one, me. Now I am part of a much larger minority, people who have recovered though a 12 step program and that minority is part of an even larger minority, people who have recovered. At this point, we talking about more people than I will ever be able to meet in my lifetime. It may be a statistically small minority of the entire population, but does it matter?

One of the things I like about going to A.A. meetings is the opportunity to meet and fellowship with other members of my minority. I don't go to bars because I don't belong there. I don't like the chain restaurants that make such a big deal out of their alcohol offerings because I don't think the food is good. The last time I went to a chain restaurant and paid nine dollars for a hamburger, I was just disappointed. The actual product was a pale imitation of the glossy picture on the menu. Of course, the same is true with the pretty pictures of the martinis and margaritas. They look pretty on the menu but when they were a part of my daily life, it was anything but pretty.

Choppy

i know what you mean. Drinking seems to be the norm.
after i cleaned up i got into more out going type activitys like hiking and mountain biking, and those types of people are usually layed back and tend to only drink occasionally if not at all.

Spawn

You would be amazed how many people don't drink and have a good time.
I had to change my play grounds and friends before I saw this to be true.

intention

Hi

Do you go to AA? I wonder because when I am there I get the feeling I am not alone and with people who know what is it is like to quit drinking. In fact, I feel like I am inside looking out, rather than on the outside looking in.