fragileflower

Hello, I first posted a few weeks ago. I am still struggling with drinking. I am so pathetic. I hate what I’ve done to myself. I’ll have a few days sober, feel good again, and then I drink…a lot. I should know better.

I am an alcoholic and cannot control my drinking. I once had nearly three years sober. And I threw it away.

I have to stop. I’m a terrible wife and mother. If my husband finds out I’m drinking again he will leave me. Not to mention the damage I am doing to myself physically and mentally.

I’ve been to AA. I find some of it helpful, but I just keep hearing the same old stories and slogans over and over. I need some practical advice on how to stop drinking and stay SOBER.

So here I am on day one again. I’m not feeling too well physically, but I feel even worse emotionally…so much guilt. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

Thanks,
fragileflower

bananagrrrl

You are in my prayers. Pray for yourself too.

I am sorry you are in the situation you are in. I hope you can stop drinking before you lose your husband.

keithj

I'll be blunt here (big surprise). It's as practical as can be. Almost nobody gets and stays sober in AA by hearing stories and slogans. Unfortunately, the message of AA is often not heard in the rooms of AA.

AA's message goes something like this: If you can not control how much you drink, or if you can't seem to leave that first drink alone, you are probably suffering from a condition that only a spiritual experience will conquer.

When I accepted that idea, I started to get real uncomfortable. There I was, facing a 5 year prison sentence, had already lost my family, job hanging by a thread, and I've come to believe that my only hope of survival is a spiritual experience. I'm a staunch atheist and I have no idea how to have a spiritual experience. I'm pretty much completely and utterly screwed at that point.

AA's Big Book contains precise, specific instructions on how to have that vital, needed spiritual experience. It's not the only way to have it, but it's a time tested, well proven way to have it.

Somebody (not everybody) in those rooms knows that message, and they know how to show you the specific directions for having that spiritual experience that will end your misery and save your life.

sev

Hello Flower and welcome. I suppose I could sit in meeting and hear the same old thing over and over and over....if that's what I was listening for. Today, I focus on finding what I need to hear. I look for similarities rather than focus on differences. I also made haste to find a sponsor quickly when I started and actually worked the steps. Going to meetings will not keep me sober. Working the program has kept me sober.

What do you have to lose at this point? Good luck, and keep us posted.

least

Is it possible to see your doctor for help getting thru withdrawal? As far as AA, could you try different meetings? Not all of them are just 'war stories and slogans'. There are other recovery programs too.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...resources.html

I hope you can stay sober to save your marriage and your life. :ghug3

CarolD

Prayers coming your way for healing and peace.

Blessings to you and your family
:

Anna

Fragileflower,

I can feel the pain in the post that you wrote.

Please don't allow the guilt and shame you feel stop you from recovering. That's part of the disease pattern. Know that you can recover.

Whether or not you use AA, you stayed sober for 3 years, so you know you need to work on sobriety every day. For practical advice, I suggest changing your daily routines, shake up your life, plan to be doing something else when you would normally be drinking, drive home from work a different way, shop at different stores. These things help to break the pattern of drinking. And, keep reading and posting.

fragileflower

Thanks everyone for your advice, well wishes, and prayers. I think I need to come back here a lot more often.

Today is my Independence day....

fragileflower

dasha

Fragileflower Hi... In a pretty similar mindset to you a few days ago..you have previously
stopped for 3 years before! wow thats some acheivement in itself an clearly you,ve been down this road before..That must make stopping again easier? as ive always thought the first times the hardest..then after that it gets easier? as you know the
route to take well...am just 4 days in this time an feelin chilled just now..But i know ive
got a whole lot of greif/temptation/cravings etc...In the post..Wish you all the best
on your own way of regaining sobriety. for sharing.

Boleo

What you hear at AA meetings has little, if anything, to do with the program.
If all you have ever used from AA is the meetings and slogans then you have not "worked" the program.

"Faith without works is dead" is one of the few slogans that is more than lip-service. If you want some practical advice try getting a sponsor and working the steps.

Dee74

Hi fragileflower

You're not pathetic - addicted maybe - but not pathetic
We've all been there - and you'll find lot of support here.

Keep posting - you're not alone

There's a variety of ways to find real life support too. Here's a link to some of the main recovery programmes

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...resources.html

Welcome to SR
D

Choppy

You can do this.

Spawn

You can do this,.....one day at a time

LosingmyMisery

I know what you mean about the slogans and stories, but AA is about action, action, and more action. Work the program. You may be pleasantly surprised. We don't have to always like AA, but it only works if you apply it. Never give up hope. There is a solution and I hope you find it. Just remember, if you want to get sober, you have to go out and find it. It won't find you. You can do this as you have done it before. Find strength...