It Has Beaten Me I Am Getting Drunk
Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 652
l wouldn't enjoy getting drunk.
l would enjoy having a few drinks with some friends.
As it happens l am going out with some friends tonight.
l will stick to cola while they will have lots of beer.
Then maybe they will not drink for a week.
l would be having a "recovery beer" the next morning for breakfast.
That's the difference.
•Life is just one damned thing after another. ----Erbert Hubbard
l would enjoy having a few drinks with some friends.
As it happens l am going out with some friends tonight.
l will stick to cola while they will have lots of beer.
Then maybe they will not drink for a week.
l would be having a "recovery beer" the next morning for breakfast.
That's the difference.
•Life is just one damned thing after another. ----Erbert Hubbard
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Philadelphia, Pa
Posts: 169
Hi Robbo, you don't know me. Lately all I've been doing is lurking when I actually do hit this site. If you read this before that first drink, please realize it is not fun anymore. I spent over 4 months sober recently before I drank again about a month ago. Since that night, I am on yet another of my wicked benders. I feel fat and bloated constantly, today I am drinking just to chase the hangover. My mental state is back where it was in my previous binges. I am now at a point where I can't figure out when to jump off the merry go round. It keeps going, and I can't get off.
To sum up my post, don't drink. You sound like you don't want to. Of course it's easier said than done, I'm proof of that. I just want to assure you that drinking still sucks.
To sum up my post, don't drink. You sound like you don't want to. Of course it's easier said than done, I'm proof of that. I just want to assure you that drinking still sucks.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,279
Hi Robbo, sorry to hear of where you are at. I went back over your first couple of posts to find a post about why you are here & the negative ramifications that alcohol has had on your life.
I did find the post below but maybe you could take some time to list out some of the negative things that you think alcohol is having on you & your life. It might help you not to pick up the next time.
Hope you find your way.
Take Care,
NB
I did find the post below but maybe you could take some time to list out some of the negative things that you think alcohol is having on you & your life. It might help you not to pick up the next time.
Hope you find your way.
Take Care,
NB
Originally Posted by robbo78 
Ben,
Know were your at 26 days sober after 10 or more years drinking 10 pints or more a night without fail.
Not to scare you because everybody is different (so i keep hearing) but i have had the blues big time.
Withdrawals have included, sweats, stress, anxiaity, fear, panic attacks, dizzy, pins and needles, tingling legs arms and face, twitching in my eyes, constant pulsating headaches (my worst constent fear of tumor) aches pains.
Been to to doctors had blood tests for Full Blood Count, Liver & Kidney and Sugar Levels, worried my self sick while waiting for results and was convinced that i had a serious liver problem. Told doctors of all my drinking and fears, put evrything down to withdrawals.
Went back a week later and with same same fears and symptoms said the same however advised to go to opticans (that can see things that shouldnt be there by all acounts) so worried for about 2 days about that and had panic attacks about going, went and had new specs but was convinced that he was going to find or say to go back to doctors. even picking up specs the next day was worried they would pull me to a side.
Still today have same fears pulse racing in my head, worried all day every day, but constantly told things will pass in time.
Just as scary was when i worked out the amount of beers on average i was drinking a minimum of 250 per month, 3000 a year or 30000 over 10 years.
Good Luck
Robbo
Know were your at 26 days sober after 10 or more years drinking 10 pints or more a night without fail.
Not to scare you because everybody is different (so i keep hearing) but i have had the blues big time.
Withdrawals have included, sweats, stress, anxiaity, fear, panic attacks, dizzy, pins and needles, tingling legs arms and face, twitching in my eyes, constant pulsating headaches (my worst constent fear of tumor) aches pains.
Been to to doctors had blood tests for Full Blood Count, Liver & Kidney and Sugar Levels, worried my self sick while waiting for results and was convinced that i had a serious liver problem. Told doctors of all my drinking and fears, put evrything down to withdrawals.
Went back a week later and with same same fears and symptoms said the same however advised to go to opticans (that can see things that shouldnt be there by all acounts) so worried for about 2 days about that and had panic attacks about going, went and had new specs but was convinced that he was going to find or say to go back to doctors. even picking up specs the next day was worried they would pull me to a side.
Still today have same fears pulse racing in my head, worried all day every day, but constantly told things will pass in time.
Just as scary was when i worked out the amount of beers on average i was drinking a minimum of 250 per month, 3000 a year or 30000 over 10 years.
Good Luck
Robbo
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 76
HI All,
Been away as you know called my brother Friday he is 4 Years sober, cried to him told i needed help and couldnt take the SH.. anymore and i was done i quit, told him for last 4 hours my leg has been twitching none stop my head is racing/Pusle/Headache and aches and pains all over just had it and i was going to get drunk. His responce " So you have done 7 weeks that F... A.. and gave me a number to called a Geezer called James (brother used this guy in rehab)
anyways spoke with James and he tried and explained in his best ways that an true alcohoilc/Drink Dependent person my not have all your symptoms but will know how hard the fight is and 7 weeks is great but is F... A.. in terms of recovery, He has been sober for 22 years and told him of y concerns over symptoms etc and he said " he got that worried he went to docs with a pimple on his nose thinking the worst (c)" He called our illness/Disease obsesive and as much as we are absesed about alcohol we are the same in recovery which is why MAYBE certain people obsense about things like myself in recovery. Told me to try and get back into AA and yet another person who doesnt seem at all worried by my symptoms and thinks its normal and will pass
Anyways had every intention of Drinking Friday but for some reason i find myself in the same situation as Friday only its Sunday.
Robbo
Been away as you know called my brother Friday he is 4 Years sober, cried to him told i needed help and couldnt take the SH.. anymore and i was done i quit, told him for last 4 hours my leg has been twitching none stop my head is racing/Pusle/Headache and aches and pains all over just had it and i was going to get drunk. His responce " So you have done 7 weeks that F... A.. and gave me a number to called a Geezer called James (brother used this guy in rehab)
anyways spoke with James and he tried and explained in his best ways that an true alcohoilc/Drink Dependent person my not have all your symptoms but will know how hard the fight is and 7 weeks is great but is F... A.. in terms of recovery, He has been sober for 22 years and told him of y concerns over symptoms etc and he said " he got that worried he went to docs with a pimple on his nose thinking the worst (c)" He called our illness/Disease obsesive and as much as we are absesed about alcohol we are the same in recovery which is why MAYBE certain people obsense about things like myself in recovery. Told me to try and get back into AA and yet another person who doesnt seem at all worried by my symptoms and thinks its normal and will pass
Anyways had every intention of Drinking Friday but for some reason i find myself in the same situation as Friday only its Sunday.
Robbo
non-drinker
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 13,841
Robbo, first and foremost, CONGRATS on not drinking!
It sucks that your withdrawl symptoms seem to be lingering. Just remember, nobody said this way gonna be a walk in the park. I've been trying to kick this thing on and off (mostly off) for my entire adult life.
The first step is stopping, the next part is trying to figure out why you've been drinking like this in the first place, then the REAL work begins.
I pray that you can find strength to overcome all this and find the inner peace that comes with true sobriety.
Above all, no matter what happens, keep us posted. We're all pulling for you.
It sucks that your withdrawl symptoms seem to be lingering. Just remember, nobody said this way gonna be a walk in the park. I've been trying to kick this thing on and off (mostly off) for my entire adult life.
The first step is stopping, the next part is trying to figure out why you've been drinking like this in the first place, then the REAL work begins.
I pray that you can find strength to overcome all this and find the inner peace that comes with true sobriety.
Above all, no matter what happens, keep us posted. We're all pulling for you.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: uk
Posts: 2,548
good morning robbo.
i remember your "real drinking"..post.
it struck me then that you were seeing a difference between hard drinkers and alcoholics.
i can say i remember feeling like you.
i got a few weeks sober and regardless of how many meeting i did i still wanted to blow my head off.
i wrongly thought that the meetings were the program of recovery.
some years ago a guy told me that he had achieved long term sobriety and was completely content without drinking.
he told me that he felt like me..........until he worked through the steps with a sponsor...at the time he had 25 years of sobriety
id missed the elephant in the room.......the program of action..the 12 steps.
i had no other option apart from suicide..........so i dived in.
then and only then did my life become bearable......and over time a new life ..a new way of thinking and a new freedom.
not easy........but easier than drinking or staying sober and doing nothing.
slowly life unfolded into something wonderful and finally i know freedom like i never have.......
i consider myself recovered.......not cured but recovered from feeling like you do..
nine years now..........because someone took the time to point out that some have to do more than sitting in meetings waiting for the contentment to fall into the there laps....
please feel free to pm if i can be of any help...........shaun
i remember your "real drinking"..post.
it struck me then that you were seeing a difference between hard drinkers and alcoholics.
i can say i remember feeling like you.
i got a few weeks sober and regardless of how many meeting i did i still wanted to blow my head off.
i wrongly thought that the meetings were the program of recovery.
some years ago a guy told me that he had achieved long term sobriety and was completely content without drinking.
he told me that he felt like me..........until he worked through the steps with a sponsor...at the time he had 25 years of sobriety
id missed the elephant in the room.......the program of action..the 12 steps.
i had no other option apart from suicide..........so i dived in.
then and only then did my life become bearable......and over time a new life ..a new way of thinking and a new freedom.
not easy........but easier than drinking or staying sober and doing nothing.
slowly life unfolded into something wonderful and finally i know freedom like i never have.......
i consider myself recovered.......not cured but recovered from feeling like you do..
nine years now..........because someone took the time to point out that some have to do more than sitting in meetings waiting for the contentment to fall into the there laps....
please feel free to pm if i can be of any help...........shaun
Love my puppies
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: lala land
Posts: 150
Robbo...i also had a ton of leg twitching when i quit drinking. I talked to my doc about it and he said I had Restless Leg Syndrom and the alcohol was masking it. It is pure hell to deal with and can drive you insane. Once I started meds for it I couldn't believe the difference. You may want to speak to your doc about the possibility of it. The relief from it is amazing!! 
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