KC1

OK. So I am back. Have my two cases of Pellegrino here in the kitchen.. Wish I could say I am drinking ONLY that. I opened a Corona Light when I got home. That was four hours ago and I am stilll "sipping it." Does this make sense to anyone? I think I am doing really well........I KNOW I have to stop...I know I can do it.... how the hell do you get around all of the external influences? I really want to feel better and know that the only way is to stop drinking. Will try anything and everything. I am ready.
KC

suki44883

A 4-hour old beer?

AcceptingChange

good plan, buying the Pelagrino. Having substitutes is a great plan. Just stopping and sitting on a couch certainly doesn't work.
(Did anyone see "Clean & Sober" with Michael Keaton?)
I had cravings today. It sucks.
I went out for a two hour walk, then ate a ton of candy. just get me through the night.

KC1

Yes, a 4-hour old beer. I hate beer so if I felt like I wanted to drink, which I did, I opened that cuz I know I will only have a few sips before I pour it out when it gets hot. There is no wine in the house and no vodka. And now no beer cuz it was the only one! Still feel like crap - must be the "withdrawal" from only having a drink or two the past few days instead of 10. My head feels kind of zoomy for lack of a better word. Heading to the beach tonight with friends - this will be the real challenge. One of our friends performs (piano player) in a bar - we go to see him whenever we visit. Everyone drinks martinis and stuff. If I can get through tonight, I can get through anything. Will be back tomorrow afternoon and hopefully, will have good things to post. Thanks again!

smacked

When I quit drinking, I quit going to bars and hanging out during "drinking" activities. Unfortunately, most of the people I thought were friends were only interested in socializing with drink in their hand. I learned quickly who was toxic to my sobriety and who was supportive. New playgrounds and playmates as a lot of folks say.. it's crucial.

matt88

You know, even if you don't utilize all of the resources that are out there - it's good to know that they're there should a time come that you decide that you need them, or know someone else who might need them. I don't attend AA regularly either, but the big book has been a good read. all the best.

KC1

Well good for me! I did just fine! Went to the happy hour and when I sat down, sure enough a very dirty Grey Goose Martini was waiting for me. I just let it sit there and ordered a club soda with cranberry juice. After awhile, I turned to my friend and said "want this?" and handed the martini over. He gladly took it and I gladly continued to drink my club soda and cranberry. Went on to dinner and I ordered a VIRGIN Mary - love the Bloody Mary's this restaurant has, but it tasted every bit as good WITHOUT the vodka. I even had two of them! On to the next place and I had cranberry and club soda again and again and again. One of the guys in our group whom I don't know too well, said "you are not as much fun as when I first met you." I said "that's because I was smashed when I met you and don't even remember meeting you half the time." He just stared at me and said "okay, fair enough." He proceeded to drink himself into oblivion. I left my friends at the bar and went to the condo. When I got back to the condo, I texted my husband and told him I was home and my friends were still at the bar. His response was "I am very very proud of you." However, this morning was the real kick-a$$! My friends could not get out of bed because they were so hungover. Normally, I'd have been one of them. I, on the other hand, got out of bed on time, read the paper, had a cup of coffee and went on to work. They still couldn't meet me for lunch because they were still in bed. I went on and had lunch by myself in our favorite pizza joint and headed on home. Now sitting here thoroughly enjoying my Pellegrino and lime, and later I am going out later to buy some club soda and cranberry. That was better than I thought it would be. So I did it!!! I am playing in a golf tournament tomorrow and so looking forward to playing WITHOUT a hangover. Thanks to all and bye for now!!!

suki44883

Way to go, KC!! You done good! Maybe you should make that going out to clubs with friends thing just an occasional outing. I mean, you handled it beautifully and all, but in early sobriety, it's best to play it safe for a while. At least you know you can handle it, if the need arises though.

CAPTAINZING2000

You're right, you'll have to want to stop. Little misleading on happy drunk. It wasn't happy at the end of most of our drinking. We'd drank all the fun out.

I didn't drink at the very end for the enjoyment of drinking, it was to feel numb. I just didn't want to feel anything. The useless feeling of not being in control drove me insane