Sending inappropriate messages while drunk
Member
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 74
I’ve said it many times that I am soooo thankful that Facebook and smart phones didn’t come around (or get popular) until after I graduated college. That would have been a disaster.
I still have done enough inappropriate things while listening to music and being on the computer however. I have a tendency to get very flirty when drunk so Facebook is the perfect vessel for that, and if you are drinking alone for hours eventually you get bored.
Many times I’ve woken up and cringed at the FB messages and conversations I’ve had. Nothing awful but very inappropriate as a married person. As long as I’m sober there are no messages so...pretty easy fix to that problem.
I still have done enough inappropriate things while listening to music and being on the computer however. I have a tendency to get very flirty when drunk so Facebook is the perfect vessel for that, and if you are drinking alone for hours eventually you get bored.
Many times I’ve woken up and cringed at the FB messages and conversations I’ve had. Nothing awful but very inappropriate as a married person. As long as I’m sober there are no messages so...pretty easy fix to that problem.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 12
Hi
Hi every one. Can't believe it's 10 years since I wrote the OP. I'm ashamed to say the drunk messaging was not enough to stop me drinking and I continued up until this September when a drunken incident not involving messaging finally made me see sense. I have been sober just over three months now, and life is much, much better!
Member
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 1,602
The thread title jumped out of the screen at me. My God did I do this - and lots of it. So utterly humiliating - it really does strip you of every ounce of dignity, alcohol. I'm pretty sure I'm a laughing stock and persona non grata in a few circles thanks to this kind of behaviour and similar. But it's OK, I'm resilient, I push on and try to not dwell on it.
Good stuff on your recent progress and I hope you keep it up and have an amazing 2020.
Good stuff on your recent progress and I hope you keep it up and have an amazing 2020.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,327
Well your story really resonated with me; I just couldn't leave Facebook be when drinking. Which was every day...
I'm also diagnosed OCD and wonder about the link between obsessive-compulsiveness and things like this.
I was as compulsive drunk writing on Facebook as I was drinking.
Thankfully I've been sober for a while now too; well done for your three months and it's good to see you back here.
I'm also diagnosed OCD and wonder about the link between obsessive-compulsiveness and things like this.
I was as compulsive drunk writing on Facebook as I was drinking.
Thankfully I've been sober for a while now too; well done for your three months and it's good to see you back here.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 12
Thanks guys. I had already started to cut down hugely about a year prior to stopping, going from almost nightly drinking to about once a month. I obviously still hadn't quite accepted that I needed to stop completely, but when I did finally accept it, the fact that I had already cut down certainly made it easier.
I think the messaging was an addiction in itself. The build up, the brief sense of relief when I finally got sufficiently inebriated to hit send, the adrenaline pumping while still drunk wondering if I would get a response and then the all engulfing sense of shame the next morning.
Briansy I am definitely a laughing stock and persona non grata to certain people too due to this particular 'hobby'. At least we aren't alone, eh? I think once you start doing it while drinking the brain becomes wired to do it when drunk. All the more reason never to drink again (among the many others)!
I think the messaging was an addiction in itself. The build up, the brief sense of relief when I finally got sufficiently inebriated to hit send, the adrenaline pumping while still drunk wondering if I would get a response and then the all engulfing sense of shame the next morning.
Briansy I am definitely a laughing stock and persona non grata to certain people too due to this particular 'hobby'. At least we aren't alone, eh? I think once you start doing it while drinking the brain becomes wired to do it when drunk. All the more reason never to drink again (among the many others)!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 11,351
Jupitar, good for you!
Sometimes its that one thing that is the straw that breaks the camels back.
It was for me too.
I can remember in the good ole days waking up to see the phone book on the table then feeling mortified, not knowing who i rang or what i said.
Then seeing all the reply messages on fb when i was being a tool.
Things i would NEVER say sober.
Then must hitting delete delete delete and saying never again, until the next time.
Nice chunk of sober time you have there , my friend. No more embarrassing moments for you....or me lol.
Sometimes its that one thing that is the straw that breaks the camels back.
It was for me too.
I can remember in the good ole days waking up to see the phone book on the table then feeling mortified, not knowing who i rang or what i said.
Then seeing all the reply messages on fb when i was being a tool.
Things i would NEVER say sober.
Then must hitting delete delete delete and saying never again, until the next time.
Nice chunk of sober time you have there , my friend. No more embarrassing moments for you....or me lol.
Sick n tired
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 509
I did this still do but not as bad as Iv had more periods of sober. I would say awful stuff and I have been blocked by a few. Hours of shame guaranteed as a result of this behaviour. I would put post it notes on fine saying do not touch me!! Like that worked! Defo time to stop drinking and in time you will feel less shame
Member
Join Date: May 2017
Location: Tyne and Wear, UK
Posts: 1,538
I have a friend who I really like, but I know we can only just be friends.
On time when I was drunk, I basically asked her out.
I didn't get a reply straight away, but when I did, she didn't mention it and she hasn't since.
I think luckily she was one of those people who knew about my problem and has just shrugged it off, but meeting her again felt, from my side anyway, a bit awkward.
Ironically, in sobriety, my confidence talking to ladies has actually shot up. I thought I used to have to be drunk to do it.
Single at the moment, but have been out for a drink (coffee!!!) with the opposite sex a few times in the past 12 months.
On time when I was drunk, I basically asked her out.
I didn't get a reply straight away, but when I did, she didn't mention it and she hasn't since.
I think luckily she was one of those people who knew about my problem and has just shrugged it off, but meeting her again felt, from my side anyway, a bit awkward.
Ironically, in sobriety, my confidence talking to ladies has actually shot up. I thought I used to have to be drunk to do it.
Single at the moment, but have been out for a drink (coffee!!!) with the opposite sex a few times in the past 12 months.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Santa paula,Ca
Posts: 40
Thought I was reading my own post. Texting and calling when completely drunk is one of the worse things for me. I literally wake up and look at my phone. So mortified! I’ve said some pretty bad stuff and random nonsense! I binge drink and tell my friends to take my phone but I have decided to stop drinking. One day at a time. Once you decide to stop you dont wake up in a panic to see who you drunk texted. Take care and know we have all been there but have the power to stop it.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2020
Posts: 3
Hi everyone
This problem has had me in the hadlock for sometime; I will frist start off saying that I'm so relieved to read and hear that I'm not alone in this. I am in a residential treatment center now for my alcohol drinking, and my text messaging push me here. I am a married man and I been texting inappropriate messages to close friends of the family!!! The inappropriate text messages started last here. I started texting people on Instagram. I DM( in box) the person fantasies mostly lies stories that would pop up in my head.. I was able to engaged with some and that open up doors for me to do it more.. Although I would delete the messages after. Well some how my wife got the messages that I've been sending. She screen save them and sent it to me while I was at work..One hour before I was to clock out and go home.. I almost died inside.. anyway fast forward.. I stop for awhile but it recently started up again.... Once I get drunk I pick up the phone and look for people to text .. I would act like I text them by mistake... Anyway I hate it so much what once was a thrill became a nightmare.I really wanted to stop and even felt guilty as I texted. Before I would press send I would look at the message like what am I doing!! Some days I would make it through the day or night without pressing send.. but I managed to do so down the line... Well that's my story for you for now, I'm new to the page.. I have 7 days without drinking I'm in a 6 months program...
This problem has had me in the hadlock for sometime; I will frist start off saying that I'm so relieved to read and hear that I'm not alone in this. I am in a residential treatment center now for my alcohol drinking, and my text messaging push me here. I am a married man and I been texting inappropriate messages to close friends of the family!!! The inappropriate text messages started last here. I started texting people on Instagram. I DM( in box) the person fantasies mostly lies stories that would pop up in my head.. I was able to engaged with some and that open up doors for me to do it more.. Although I would delete the messages after. Well some how my wife got the messages that I've been sending. She screen save them and sent it to me while I was at work..One hour before I was to clock out and go home.. I almost died inside.. anyway fast forward.. I stop for awhile but it recently started up again.... Once I get drunk I pick up the phone and look for people to text .. I would act like I text them by mistake... Anyway I hate it so much what once was a thrill became a nightmare.I really wanted to stop and even felt guilty as I texted. Before I would press send I would look at the message like what am I doing!! Some days I would make it through the day or night without pressing send.. but I managed to do so down the line... Well that's my story for you for now, I'm new to the page.. I have 7 days without drinking I'm in a 6 months program...
Member
Join Date: Oct 2020
Posts: 69
I feel for you! Every morning I pull up my emails and texts and hope I didn't make an ass out of myself. Literally it's part of my morning routine. Praying to my God for the resolve to quit again. It wasn't perfect but I felt so amazing
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,645
I made a moron out of myself in every way possible when I was drinking.
Especially through Facebook and text messages.
Text messaging my boss and stuff. Sometimes when I was supposed to be at work and had called in "sick..."
I was just ******* crazy.
I haven't had a drink since July 7 of this year and that behavior has stopped.
I don't even browse Facebook anymore. And I certainly don't talk to people on there.
Especially through Facebook and text messages.
Text messaging my boss and stuff. Sometimes when I was supposed to be at work and had called in "sick..."
I was just ******* crazy.
I haven't had a drink since July 7 of this year and that behavior has stopped.
I don't even browse Facebook anymore. And I certainly don't talk to people on there.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2020
Posts: 69
When I screwed up and get wasted I find myself (sometimes after waking up at 4am) checking my texts and posts to websites to see if I embarrassed myself. If I didn't I was relieved. If I did I was horrified and would avoid said forum for days
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