jhvw2000

I drank 2 beers for the first time since January 16th, 2008. Here's kinda what led up to it: I get a phone call from my twin that I haven't spoken to in over a year (different topic) saying he needed my help. Turns out he's on the outs with his wife, can't drive because of a DWI and needed a place to stay. Same day we find out he has to have his aortic valve replaced with a mechanical one....So...the next 3 days I was in the hospital with him while he had surgery and he's staying here with me until he gets recovered enough to figure his life out....He also brought 2 cases of very stout home-brewed beer from his house and put them in my fridge. The night before his surgery he was drinking and I ended up giving into my temptations, luckily quit before I got drunk and got really nuts. I feel horribly guilty, I know I need to know it's just a setback and to work forward from here, and I did get the beer out of the house and over to my parents. So at least I'm back to no alcohol in my place. I know I screwed up when I let him bring it here in the first place, at the time I was just so relieved that he was talking to me...excuses excuses I guess. I'm trying to get someone to be with him so I can get to a meeting (he can't be alone until next week at least) but nobody is wanting to help out...it's a mess. So I guess I'm back to being 6 days sober (this happened this last thursday night) and just feel so dissapointed in myself. And wondering how I'm going be able to get him recovered and all the other drama...I need to catch one of the chat AA meetings at least.....

solice

God bless you. 16-17 months is a great accomplishment. Last time I had that long I didn't have just two and I didn't sto the next days. Mine lead to a drunken 3 year run. IT gets harder to get back on the each time...

I'd say this was a minor set back, not the end of the world. Just because we have one drink doesn't mean we failed. I hope to have 2 days after today..

keithj

jhvw,

Were you working a program of recovery, such as AA? Did you take the steps and continue to practice the principles? It never surprises me that alcoholics drink. It's what we do. But, I found that after I took those 12 steps and continued with what was suggested, I've never had to start over in sobriety.

jhvw2000

I'm attend AA meetings (not as much as I'd like to at the moment with him recovering here), and I do have someone to sit with me today so I can make the noon meeting. I'm still working the steps, and went back to my big big last night before I went to sleep to hear some words of wisdom.

CarolD

Good to know you are continuing your recovery journey

Praers for a speedy recovery going out to your brother.
That was a scare for both of you....

Blessings

gravity

Sounds like you are doing the right things.

What I would try to do:

-Stay close to the program - meetings when you can, SR (AA forum, chat), phone calls, invite other members over to your place (informal AA meeting)

-PRACTICE THESE PRINCIPLES

-Prayer, spiritual growth

- One day at a time - don't beat yourself up over the 2 beers (morbid reflection) or obsess about future challenges (which may turn out to be nothing anyway). Just keep doing the next right thing.


I'm not trying to minimize those 2 beers but it is what it is. I think what you do next is more important. Can only learn from it and take action today.

jhvw2000

Thank you guys. I made the meeting today and talked to my temp sponsor about the same thing gravity was talking about. Not looking back but continuing to work forward in my recovery. As soon as this stress calms down I'm sure it'll be even easier.

I mentioned how quickly an urge can sneak up on you in the substance abuse forum (almost took my brother's pain meds but stopped myself). I know I need to work on tools for handling those inevitable stressful situations that pop up in life.

Nevertheless

Hello jhvw
This is the way alcohol works. It sneaks up on you, and before you know what happened your going "what happened". As someone else said, glad you stopped at 2. Just get back to meetings as mush as possible, and I hope your brother the best. Take care.

jhvw2000

Just an update. My brother is recovering as expected, which is great. I've been able to go a meeting the past few days and one of his co-workers is going to come over from 12-1 so I can go to noon meetings this week. I hadn't been in contact with my brother much before this and we've gotten much closer. Talking about his life and mine, etc. He understands I need the support of AA right now and is being great about it. I feel blessed to have kinda nipped this relapse or whatever you call it and have his support and meetings to go to. Thank you all!

McGowdog

I hope your bro wasn't made to feel guilty that you drank those beers.

A recovered alcoholic can go places where booze is and not be tempted. For example, in one of our spare bed rooms, there's a Waterford crystal jug full of Jack Daniels and I'll bet there's some beers in the fridge for my brother in law who stays with us from time to time.

As a result of doing AAs 12-steps, I don't get tempted from booze, nor do I have to hide from it, even in my own home.

If you're a real alcoholic, it's a shame to lose your sobriety over 2 beers. Wow! But if your bro would have known you still had an alcoholic mind, aka not recovered, he might not have done that. How was he to know?

Sad deal all the way around.

When you get your 9th Step done, you are at step 10 and you have "entered the world of the Spirit, safe and protected." You would have recoiled from booze as from a hot flame. That's been my experience anyway. I've not even had an obsession of any sort in over 5 years.

What step were you on, anyway? And why/how did you stop at two beers? Are you sure you're an alcoholic and/or need AA?

joedris

Don't beat yourself up over a slip. You did exactly the right things. You're back on track now, so I'd say that your recovery process is going very well. I'd quote you the statistics about how many people make it through the 1st year w/o a relapse up to the
probabliity of making it to 5 years, but it's too scary. Just remember the words of the Big Book, "Seldom have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path." So if you want good odds, that how to do it.