RightAngled

Hey guys - well I did 23 days but stumbled on Valentines day, Worse thing was that I was babysitting for my neice and as I had not drank for that time, just basically passed out. My neice had to phone my sister, who, not suprisingly is upset. Have been an uncle for 10 years and this has never happened. Dont know what was going on in my head. I took the first drink and foolishly thought I was better than it - that nothing bad could happen. How stupid. Had done so well and things seemeed so muxh better. On that day I walked past my ex's house and saw her new partners car was there and all sorts of things hit my head. Took me a good few hours before I acted upon it. BUt then I did. To do it to yourelf is bad enough, but to your 7 year old neice. That is low. Lower than anything. Guess all I can do is pick myself and convince the populous I am not as bad as they think. Day 1 for me then. Sorry. Take care. x

Ready to Change

We slip. Congats on day 1

24hrsAday

ODAT.. get back up and stay sober another 24 hours! you can do it..

weekendbinger

Let this be a learning experience for you. You've done 23 days which is incredible progress. Now you know for sure you can't control it....so, stop again and this time keep it going! You can do it!!!

:ghug3

bovinePieBear

Like weekendbinger says - at least now you know for sure. 23 days was a fantastic achievement... then you slipped, and it was bad, but seems to me that you need to take it for what it is and give yourself a break.

There's no point beating yourself up over the shame, and there's not a lot you can do or say that will bring other's forgiveness right now. But you can learn the lesson and stay sober. Good luck, RA.

SelfSeeking

You'll never be able to erase what you did, but in time, if you keep doing "the next right thing" as they say, you can eventually become someone your sister can trust and your niece can look up to. That's the best way to make it up to them. It starts today

yeahgr8

IMO you need to think about what to change and how to change it, it seems that just stopping drinking is not going to be enough so don't bang your head against the wall again and get on to an alcohol counseller, AA etc. Good luck:-)

CarolD

We have a list of various recovery programs
for you to explore.

It's a sticky post so please check it out.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-programs.html

Here is something you might find interesting

Alcoholics Anonymous UK Newcomers

Yes! we cab abd do recover from alcoholism!

RightAngled

Thanks for the responses. I went to a meeting last night and listended to a realy good share. It was good to share the circumstances of my relapse to those who had been there and would offer no judgement. The guy there said an interesting thing, that many many bad things happen, but he would have it no other way as these things needed to happen for him to recover. I identify with that. Part of me used to scoff at the notion of digesting too much of the past as it seemed to easy and negated taking much personal responsibility and trying to learn. I realise one can do both. People at the meeting were realy supportive and said not to be too hard. That I do find hard becuase if I dont reflect then I will do it again and I need to have things in place (i.e. someone to talk to) if I feel like using. This is now in place. I am hoping after a longer period of sobriety I can get a sponser.

This thing called alcoholism has a frightening ability to scare me.

Well I have another meeting tonight and work to keep me busy, so I will take it from there.

Take care

firestorm090

Welcome to your new life, starting today.

nelco

great to hear you taking action!! keep it up; thanks for sharing.

thisisme

Power to you.


"Don't give up, your not alone"
YouTube - SIXX:A.M. Accidents Can Happen

RightAngled

Hey guys - just to update - I have spoken to my sister yesterday for 3 hours and we had a good chat. It was not as bad as I thought. I admitted my wrongs to her - I was not seeking forgiveness - only I can forgive myself. I think, nay I hope that we understand eachother a bit better from that.

Back at work after yet another bout of illness - my immune system seems down and a cold knocks me out for a week. I hate missing work as it gives me the focus I need.

All I can say is that today thus far is going better than yesterday!

Thanks for all your messages

Paul