New2VA

I was wondering anyone who attends AA meetings on a regular basis. I went YEARS ago and we talked about our problems, why we drank, etc. and I gave out probably too much info. Well when my husband came to pick me up, they told HIM everything I said, which was "supposed" to be confidential. I'm thinking of going back but not sure what to expect.

CarolD

Wow! that was not a positive experience you had.
And it's certainly not what AA is about.
I'm so sorry this happened to you....

Did you and your husband stay together after the gossip?

Yes..I have attended AA regularly for years.
I do enjoy meetings....and by living the Steps
I've found much peace and joy.

Again...this is not the AA I know.

Please let us know how your doing...k?

Astro

"What you see here, what you hear here, when you leave here, let it stay here".

No, that wasn't a positive experience and it's definitely not what AA's about. I've heard plenty of gossip at meetings, and I'm sure I've indulged in it myself, but it doesn't follow our principles to share about another members experiences, unless we can "share in a general way" rather than directly.

Try some other meetings, and remember....take what you want and leave the rest.

New2VA

thanks. I'll probably check it out again since it's been so long. No me and my husband DID not stay together after the gossip but there was a lot more to our marriage than that.

CAPTAINZING2000

People are human but, that shouldn't have happened.

Try another group if, possible some groups are a lot better then others.

I can't believe any old timers didn't stop this from occurring!

TryingSoHard

I've had generally very positive experiences at meetings, but I've only been about 7 times so I'm probably not the best person to ask. I can tell you that at the ones I went to, there was NO indication WHATSOEVER that anything said within the walls would EVER leave the room. It was definitely a supportive and safe environment. At least that's how it made me feel.

flutter

I don't attend AA meetings, but I have. They were always welcoming, and I felt pretty safe with my information and the people there. Try again! Might be the best thing for you

baggervance

I had my trust broken early in my first go around in AA i live in a very small town everyone knew I was a drunk but it embarassed me I was tryin to get help. I didn't want anyone to know and this person told my mother -in -law in the middle of the bank where she works. I dont share anthing at the meetings that i would not share with anyone on the street. If I have something I dont want told I tell my sponser. I sometimes share what I hear at the meetings with my wife but never who was there or who sald it. Ive had people ask me if so and so was going to AA and i always say I wouldnt know. when you first make that huge step to go it s private and should stay that way till you are ready to share. I try and never break anyones trust I never want someone to feel the way I felt and I will never be completely trusting shareing in a group setting. Be careful what you say if you are in a small.

CarolD

Glad to know uou plan give AA another chance...
It's such a beneficial force for good in my life.

I really felt my recovery became solid
when I began my AA Step work.
Sooo......I suggest you start your Steps too..

SoberforME

I go to AA and I am grateful for it.

However, I was at a sports bar watching the game and a person I had met at a meeting came too. I had a friend who didn't know about me sitting there too. I'm talking to this guy and he says' Hey are you going to incorporate AA humor into your comedy?"

O...M...G!!!!

I was appalled. It turned me off AA for awhile so I can understand. Now I know that without meetings I don't have a chance of staying sober.

Fulldresser4

Woah...not cool at all. I did 90 in 90, and through keeping quiet most of the time, but crying a whole lot, I kind of learned who was woofing and who I could trust somewhat. For me, I found Celebrate Recovery, and it is a totally safe and confidential environment, even in the groups it's women with women and men with men. Just my esh.

Annie

New2VA

I heard about Celebrate Recovery and wish there was one by where I live. There was a bunch in Illinois where I lived previously but unfortunately never went.

navysteve

Hi there,
Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like...

It is a good idea to not disclose too much information in an open room of people. When you get one o one with someone you may find a bit more confidentiality. I stick to the prblem and solution of alcoholism. I do not use AA for therapy. When I put something out in an open room it becomes public property

Fulldresser4

New2VA...I just sent you a private message

tommyk

I love NA/AA but I wouldn't mention anything there that I wanted kept confidential.

I keep that kind of sharing for my 'inner circle'.

CarolD

We have a list of various recovery programs as a sticky post
From there... I found this site

http://www.celebraterecovery.com/

That might be the way to find their meetings

Yes! you too can win over alcohol!

Mark75

Hi New2VA - No way that should have happened, wow, hard to believe...

Give it another go. Are there women only meetings near you?, maybe you'll feel safer there and you can ask about other meetings that you'd feel comfortable attending.

I go to about 4-5 meetings a week. Some of them I look forward to attending!

Good luck, welcome to SR !

Mark

Tommyh

I go to AA and I do not tell anything too personnel at the meeting.I save that for my sponsor or a really good AA friend.

Isaiah

That's blatantly inexcusable. I hear a lot of inter-AA blabbing but that's horrid. I would not go back to that meeting.

I did a lot of searching to find a meeting I liked. Luckily there are a lot where I live. The first one I went to was awful. It was just a circus of egomaniacs. I tried a bunch of others in my city and pretty much said as little as possible, and only went once a week as the courts made me do. On a few occasions I'd just exchange log sheets with another guy before the meeting and we'd both bail out.

Luckily I moved last year, right down the street from my current home group. I know at least 90% of the people there on any given day, and they're the most supportive bunch. I go to as many meetings there as I can. It's one of the things that I most look forward to during the week.

least

I've been to meetings I really liked and enjoyed and to some others I did not like, due to a few members constant 'preaching'. I don't go to the meetings I don't like due to a few members, but have a good experience at the others. The principles of AA and its members are two separate things.