Bangoob

Hi guys! Long time no seen. Looks like I pop in only in times of great distress - ungrateful *******! You may remember my old story about my dad's birthday which was on October 5, and my determination to stay sober and not act as a trigger for him, as the doctor advised him completely against drinking. Well, since then I've embarked on a series of wild benders, missed days at work, drove drunk, and discovered that my dad picked up again (usually 'smuggling' bottles of wine into the house and going to the cellar to "check on" the homemade wine he produces every year. We've become drinking buddies too; as my working schedule is more relaxed, we drank during his office hours, and then in the evenings as well. Absolutely insane. I haven't had a drop since yesterday at 9.30 pm and feel like crap. What's more, today is my patron saint's feast (St Nicholas) and my parents and in-laws are going to show up later during the day to celebrate. I'm determined to not have a drop of whatever contains alcohol today, encouraged also by my dad's promise that starting tomorrow he'll quit too. What worries me the most is that I may have developed an addiction to valium as well as I always detox at home taking the pills according to a schedule I designed but didn't tell my doctor about. This time I want to go absolutely cold turkey as a double addiction is way too scary. Not to mention that Christmas approaches... I also made an appointment with a psychologist whom I'm going to meet next Friday. Sober, I hope. I'm extremely lucky that my mother and my wife are sooo supportive: far more than I actually deserve. We have all agreed that this suicidal pattern of mine has to stop as I simply can't go on like this: 3 days sober, 10 days drunk, then back to valium, and so on ad infinitum. Thanks for listening to this drunk's rambling monologue!

Love & peace,
Goob

gantz

good luck on your journey to becoming sober. Even if you slip at least you continue to try thats means alot right there.

Although there are may stumbling blocks on the path you will reach a sober end eventually I know it. I hope you start feeling the good effects of being sober soon as each day feeling fresh and sober will give you more encouragement and strength. I know it has done that for me.

problemchild

Bangoob, never give up just keep trying new things to stay sober, AA, or some other support is always best, the physc might be just the extra help you need, if not keep looking, if we stop trying we end up dying..

Take care,
John

CarolD

I certainly hope this will be the time you and your Dad
will find your way into a sober healthy future.

For sobriety to finally work for me...
I had to want it more than I wanted to drink.

I do use God and AA for serene joy filled recovery.

Welcome back to SR....