BackToSquareOne

I was just thinking about how different things are since I'm not drinking. No more falling down knocking things over, no more trips to the liquor store with my hands shaking so bad I could hardly hand the cashier the money. I'm no longer paranoid about police cars, I don't wake up sick every morning. The constant anxiety and depression are becomming distant memories.

But most of all my biggest fear is gone, crazy as it may sound when I was drinking my biggest fear was running out of liquor. It sounds odd but no matter how drunk I was I remained cognizant of how much liquor I had left. I started buying vodka by the case to limit the trips but the day always came when I'd need more. What a dilema that always was, risk getting a DUI or go through withdrawal. I always took the risk and luckily never got a DUI.

Just hoping that I'll never have to relive any of that. Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!!!

MagicMan08

My biggest fear is failure

Bamboozle

My biggest fear was being sober (that meant I would have to go without my crutch).






Now...my greatest fear is falling back into the deep drinking hole...and not making it out.



.

Kellye C

Wow, I think my biggest fear was being rejected followed by being ridiculed followed by being out of control (ring a bell anyone?)

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
Kellye

skunkhamster

being mad drunk on thxgvngg

AW2486

I'm with you on this Kellye .. Fear of what others think of me, which stems from fear of rejection. It socially paralyzed me for years.

CarolD

My biggest fear when I was a drinker....almost came true.
I feared losing my mind...and I teetered on insanity.

Depression ...suicide attempts...mental hospitals...
all part of my alcoholism.

What a blessing and joy recovery is!...8


:thank1....Back....good to see you again!

Pam08

I fear in some ways my sober future. I am still new but I know life will be better, I am feeling better everyday, but it still is scarey to know that I will be living everysecond coherent.

colagirl

My biggest fear is trying to deal with life sober. It terrifies me, but I'm going to give it a try.

LosingmyMisery

My biggest fear was running out of booze also. I always planned for enough booze for the morning. I was afraid of going through the anxiety and sickness that withdrawal brought on. What a horrible way to live. I'm so grateful to be free from that insanity. Today my number 1 priority is just living life, not buying more booze to make it through the day, to pass out, to awake to more booze, repeat.

beingjenagain

I feared feeling and now that I do it isn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be!

tommyk

Me too.

getr345

My biggest fear was DEATH. Or that I would just drink the best years of my life away, wake up at 45, or 50, realize I actually did drink my life away, could not ever stop, and now had to keep right on drinking and deal with health issues, or death. That nobody would ever notice I needed help, that I would be too weak-willed and stupid to ever stop the bleeding. That I would never have stopped the cycle of addiction, and alcohol abuse...

gravity

Many things terrified me after each bender - I will lose my family, my job, my sanity. This stuff would pass and I would drink again. One constant fear was that I was an alcoholic, that I was weak, that my fantasy life was unattainable. I just could not accept that I would never be able to enjoy drinking.

Once I accepted that I am an alcoholic, my biggest fears were that I could not quit and if I did, life would be boring...day in day out. These fears were unwarranted. I have quit drinking (over 11 months) and my life without alcohol blows away my old existence.

Today, my biggest fear is that the past will come back and bite me but it's not the same constant obsession I had when I was still drinking. More manageable and I'm dealing with it.

Texasblind

Like Carol, it was insanity. Near the end, I really felt like I was losing my mind. I actually asked to be put in a psych unit, I tried to commit myself. But they wisely told me "no, you just need to stop drinking."

LibertyorDeath

My biggest fear was being discovered for being the fraud I was...living the double life....hiding, covering up, and lying.

Pinkcuda

I was most afraid of other people. I never knew this until I put it down on paper in my 4th. The more they rejected me, the more I rejected them as an act of self preservation. It was a lot easier when I thought they were wrong.

lisa t

Biggest fear when drinking....people finding out the truth....i wasn't the outgoing, with it, smart, funny, beautiful person i portrayed!

Biggest fear sober....the booze of course...duh!!! :0)

Rusty Zipper

as the alcoholic caught in the mist of it, running out of liquor, as you mentioned...

wow, the Espionage involved with that!

and for the underlying issues of this alk'y...

FEAR!!!

Tommyh

my biggest fear was people,and what you would think of me if only you knew.......what I had done and what I was really like inside