Hawkeye1926

Well, the old saying...getting sick and tried of being sick and tired. I just didn't feel right with who I was. There were a lot of "yets" for me. Haven't lost the family...yet. I think I mentioned this before. I wasn't happy, and it's just interesting how it all came about. I went to an AA meeting as part of a requirement for my undergrad studies (and my internship). The person that I now call my mentor took me to my first one. Unknown to anyone I kept going even after just one for information. It's the best thing I've ever done. It's interesting...because in some odd way...nobody knew what was going on (or if they did, they turned the other cheek) during the addiction and it came as a surprise to those around me when I told them I was sober.

Now, those close to me look back on those years and realize yeah...there were A LOT of problems then. IT was a personal choice. I wouldn't trade it for the world and I'm a firm believer in everything happening for a reason. It was a wake up call. In those meetings, I realized the path I was on, and gained a lot of knowledge from those around me. I realized how lucky/blessed I was that I saw what I was doing to myself before I did permenant damage to the ones I love and myself.

It's odd. People will ask me...I don't even know what to say about "addiction" or if I even was. Per the DSM-IV (I know, I know) yes I met most of the criteria...but even if I didn't...the personal consequences of drinking were not worth the benefits of sobriety. That's why I keep doing what I'm doing. It's quite simply not worth it.