Cherryxxx

...Can anybody recommend a book that will help me during the first year of sobriety? Id like to try and find out what I should expect in the first year.

The only one I can seem to find is "First Year of Sobriety - When All That Changes Is Everything"....but it was published in 1998, so I wonder if the information is a bit outdated? Has anyone read this and is it any good? Also, are its principles religion based like the AA?

I have been sober for 6 months next Sunday, so have already been through the honeymoon period etc, but I dont have a clue what to expect from now on.

Thanks loads

:-)

x

chip

Hi Cherryxxx
I found the book "living sober" very helpful for me in my first year. It is published by AA, but it's a practical guide that can help anyone (not really "religion" based). It gives great examples of how to handle certain situations ie. social functions. It was published several years ago, but it can be applied to life in 2008.
chip

tommyk

My opinion - not being offensive -

For me trying to learn about a sober lifestyle through a book was like trying to learn to drive by reading a book. Sooner or later I had to spend some time behind the wheel under different situations.

Congrats on 6 months sober! I love the AA literature and meetings.

Cherryxxx

Thanks to you both for replying :-) I shall check out the book.

No offense taken :-) And Thanks for the congrats!

Ive been in loads of different situations where I would usually use alcohol e.g. nightclubs, parties, social gatherings...Ive been around people drinking alcohol very reguarly and I have felt ok with it...

I also stayed sober through my birthday, xmas and new years, which are all times I associate strongly with alcohol....but occasionally I feel like I forget why I got sober in the first place and think that reading books about it may help keep me motivated. I want to know what other people have experienced while going through different stages, so I have an idea of what to expect (I didnt know about the honeymoon period and how you feel when it ends, and I think that if I had read about it before I went through it, it would have helped a lot) How long have you both been sober? Have you had the feelings I mentioned, when you sometimes forget why you gave up alcohol and think it cant be that bad and are tempted?

Thanks once again for your help....

x

chip

Hi again Cherryxxx,
I know what you are talking about when you mention the "honeymoon period". I also know about temptation, and the thought that one is "ok" after a period of abstainence.

Let me tell you a bit about my story. I am a sober alcoholic, and I havn't had a drink in over 3 years. Admitting that I'm an alcoholic is crucial to my sobriety because my disease tells me I'm alright. Alcoholism is weird that way; it's a disease of the mind. I have to renind myself that I'm not alright...even when I feel good. I know about the "honeymoon period" and how some people decide they are "cured". I've also seen them come back to AA, and they tell me things kept getting worse as soon as they drank. I've spent lots of time here, and in AA meetings. I'm very familiar with all the literature, and I've spoken with many other Alcoholics. Everything points at one conclusion; alcoholism is progressive, and it even progresses during periods of sobriety. I've never heard of ANYONE with alcoholism quitting and going back to successful drinking.

Are you an alcoholic? If you don't know, you may want to find out. It's good to have a solid foundation to base your future decisions on. I remind myself daily that I'm an alcoholic so that when a time of temption arises...drinking isn't even an option.
chip

Peter

"living sober" was very good reading for me during my first year. It was a useful accessory to my Big Book and 12x12

Jfanagle

This is an interesting query, and one that I hadn't thought about for quite awhile. I read a great deal after first getting sober and in reflection most of my reading was not so much about sobriety, but more about the particular aspects of staying sober that were a challenge to me. I had a difficult time with the "higher power" issue and several people in AA recommended metaphysical books and even some rather "strange" books, in my opinion at any rate, that addressed GOD in a manner that I had never looked at. If you are interested you are welcome to private message me. I don't want to raise issues about the validity of any or all of these books, as I don't really have a dog in that fight.

My point is that in the first two years of my sobriety I found myself trying to establish my new persona, one that let me know who I was without alcohol, and who I was going to become. This self realization ultimately made it possible for me to go anywhere alcohol was being served and it was no longer an issue, because the fellow who used to attend these functions as a drinker was no longer who I was. It has been as if I was never a drinker, and it has made many of my associates, both business and social much more comfortable as well.

I might suggest that if you have interests or questions that living sober has raised, find books that are in those areas, and read and contemplate the thoughts of others. If you simply want the protocol of behavior in situations that other recovering alcoholics have observed then I suspect that the books already suggested may well fill your needs.

If I am way off base with what your questions are, pleas chalk it up to the musings of a man on a very pleasant and relaxing Sunday afternoon. I attended a meditation meeting earlier today and then a yoga class, so perhaps I am out in the ozone?

Keep up the good work, and the fact that you are continuing to look for GROWTH in AA and sobriety is a great indicator that you will continue to have success.

Keep coming back no matter what.

Jon

coffeenut

Very interesting thread, Cherry. I was just searching for books about the first years of sobriety, myself.

Can you elaborate more about the 'honeymoon' period?

nandm

There is a book called "Stools and Bottles" it is also referred to as the Little Green Book. I find it useful in my sobriety.

Tazman53

Living Sober & Stools & Bottles I loved, the Stools & Bottles I hold dear to my heart, it was given to me by a man that has been sober for over 30 years, it was given to him when he had about a month sober.

You know reading books like the above, the Big Book & the 12X12 have helped me stay sober for a little over 2 years, but what has helped me the most has been face to face conversations and shares by people with anywhere from 1 day sober to 50 years sober, I can ask questions of them and get real time answers.

I am not knocking books at all, they have been a great aide in my recovery, but for me books alone would have never helped me stay sober this long. Meeting and talking with a newcomer reminds me in vivid detail of where I was at and talking with people who have been sober for many years gives me hope that I can one day at a time never drink again.

I sat and spoke with a gentleman that had been sober many years the day before he passed, he was at peace with himself and the world, he had no fear of passing and had no thought of a drink, he lay on his death bed and spoke with me and many of his other friends with a smile on his face, he spoke with his family the whole time and was at peace with them as well.

He shared with me that thanks to the program he was able to know he was in his final days and had no real regrets for his past, he had made amends to all those he could and had been forgiven by them, he held no grudges against a single soul. I strive to have what he had.

What Jim gave me that day can be found in no book.