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Texasblind 09-17-2008 09:20 AM

Again
 
I'm dying here. It's been a really bad couple of days.

Again, I was told I was "the second choice." for a job, this is the 5th or 6th time. I don't even keep count anymore.

I'm so ******* sick of being the "runner up" in life. How do I win? I am sick of being anyone's "second best."

I apologize to the board, don't read my craziness, I just have to express somewhere. I have been having a very rough patch. I'll shut up now.

dancinggirl 09-17-2008 09:23 AM

Aw, that sucks! If I was going to be nauseatingly upbeat I'd say, "but think of all the great interview practice you're getting!". Um, good thing I'm not saying that. ;) You will get something, it's just a matter of waiting it out. The hardest things are when you don't know how much longer you have to wait...but it'll happen. Sorry that things are going so hard right now!

Texasblind 09-17-2008 09:32 AM


Originally Posted by dancinggirl (Post 1912750)
Aw, that sucks! If I was going to be nauseatingly upbeat I'd say, "but think of all the great interview practice you're getting!". Um, good thing I'm not saying that. ;) You will get something, it's just a matter of waiting it out. The hardest things are when you don't know how much longer you have to wait...but it'll happen. Sorry that things are going so hard right now!

If you said that, and you did, I would get a big laugh, and I did. Thank you.

I have a job, I've just been looking for something a little more stable. I want to make a huge career change and it's hard to convince people. That question "why the change?" is hurting me. I can explain it, but people don't want to hear it, so it seems.

CarolD 09-17-2008 10:48 AM

Hmm...
I found an interesting job..completely out of
my job history by networking beore AA meetings.

Funny you should mention this....I just counseled
my 29 year old Grandson to stay in the Army.
He's making decent money... benefits for his son
and his skills are not very marketable "outside"

IMO ..our economy is sliding downhill

Mega :hug: ...Prayers continue for your serenity

Tommyh 09-17-2008 05:44 PM

Tex
look at what`s going right in your life and be grateful for it.If we continually focus on whats wrong,we`ll end up on our.....pity pot of self pity...poor me,poor me,pour me a drink..

I don`t have a pity pot,I have a pity recliner!I try and avoid it..

stay gratefully dude,one day at a time!

Tommy

Texasblind 09-17-2008 09:12 PM

I am trying to change from a very artistic type of thing into some reality,

**** it, I'll say it to a group of strangers. If you didn't know, I'm an opera singer. That is what I do for a living. That is what I cannot escape from.

I have/had the life so many young artists want, yet all I want is to be back 9 -5 M-F again. I do not want to do this. I am stuck here so it seems. I get job offers, but they are all "sing this, direct that" I just want some normalcy and stability in my life. That's the only way I'll get married again, that's the only way I'll ever have children. Women say they do, but they really don't, want the artist. It's so funny, because I do this, and I do this for a living, and it's killing me.

I just feel like I'm dying inside. I took a long break, and that didn't even help. I have to pay the bills, so I have to do Die Fledermaus, again. What do you do when you really have no skills? I have all the useless degrees in the world, but that doesn't explain that you have been independently employed for 15 years.

Texasblind 09-17-2008 09:26 PM


Originally Posted by bballdad (Post 1913416)
pity pot of self pity...poor me,poor me,pour me a drink..


Tommy

Tommy,

I'm stealing that line. Just to let you know.

Thanks so much for everything you've done for me.

Tex

bostonluv 09-17-2008 09:34 PM

I've always loved that line. I related instantly to it. ;)

Opera singer doesn't sound so bad. I love opera music. Maybe you're just dating the wrong girls. Nope. Not hitting you. Just it's not as bad as say, janitor or gas station attendant. Something will open for you. I know it. The economy is tough right now. Hugs to everyone looking for work!!

Texasblind 09-17-2008 09:53 PM


Originally Posted by bostonluv (Post 1913595)
I've always loved that line. I related instantly to it. ;)

Opera singer doesn't sound so bad. I love opera music. Maybe you're just dating the wrong girls. Nope. Not hitting you. Just it's not as bad as say, janitor or gas station attendant. Something will open for you. I know it. The economy is tough right now. Hugs to everyone looking for work!!

I love opera, I love to sing. I hate being that guy. I hate disappearing for three weeks. I hate doing the same damn shows over and over. If I have to play Figaro one more time...Oh that's right, I'm doing that (again) in a few weeks. How can you learn lines when you've done the same show 20 TIMES! I really need to find some new stuff.

Yes, I absolutley am dating the wrong girls. You do not meet the right ones in this business.

Like I said, don't anyone listen to me. I'm venting and I'm an idiot.

Cathy31 09-17-2008 10:58 PM

Are you sober Texas? I know when I was still in active addiction I couldn't think straight and everything was bad bad bad. AA worked for me...on so many levels.
Cathy31
x

Coolmummy 09-18-2008 03:50 AM

It is s*** isn't it - I've been out of work for a while now and have had interviews - yep, 'down to the last two', 'we don't want you but your interview skills are first class', 'dear ms...we had a huge response to our advert so unfortunately...' etc etc.

I could give up and start drinking again, I could give in to my money problem and hit my credit card limits on rubbish i don't need, i could lie in bed all day and cry, but I can't. I owe it to my family and to myself to keep trying, to stay the 'different person' my husband says I am now, to not do all these things.

And - my house is sparkling!!

No excuses. It's no-ones 'fault'. True, it's 'not fair' but what is nowadays?

stay strong

love
sas

Tazman53 09-18-2008 05:13 AM

Tex are you willing to relocate? Have you floated a resume to PBS or any other networks? Today there are a ton of TV/Cable networks offering an awful lot of possibilities of long term steady employment that could make use of some of your skills.

Stay sober, pray, and keep working at it, there is a job for you, you simply have to keep searching until you find it.

Texasblind 09-18-2008 07:19 AM

Taz: Of course I'm willing to relocate. I do apply for jobs out of state, there is a wonderful resource for us called Artsearch. I just feel I am stuck in a career I really don't want and I really don't have the skills to change. I try to stop, but the money comes and I'm a *****. I've done the TV/film thing and it's really not me, I did enough of that. I prefer the live stage. If I movie I worked on comes on, I change the channel. But, I am glad for the .05 cent check I'll be getting in a few weeks.

Cathy: Yes, I'm sober. Long enough, but not long enough.

I'm in a real rut right now.

Cathy31 09-18-2008 09:15 AM

Hey Texas
Glad you sober, at least that's out the way! :) I know how it feels to be in a rut, it's not cool :( but it's so much better than drinking!!! I don't konw which proram you are working, but I know this too shall pass, and what helped me recently was the adage : just act different to how you FEEL - those feelings will change...
Cathy31
x

RufusACanal 09-18-2008 09:46 AM

...and I thought I had it bad when I had to sing for a meal at the mission. Chin up friend!

Texasblind 09-18-2008 11:37 AM


Originally Posted by RufusACanal (Post 1914008)
...and I thought I had it bad when I had to sing for a meal at the mission. Chin up friend!

Now that was funny.

Chin up I will. Thank you.

I'm in a very bad way lately. Not to the point of my sobriety, but just generally feeling very bad.

Texasblind 09-18-2008 12:00 PM

Taz: By the way, the PBS thing made me smile. I did a show for them recently about art education in Central America as a way to help children overcome abadonment or addiction related issues.

Celebration1994 09-18-2008 12:14 PM

I was 47 years old and had a 6th grade education when I got sober. I was scared that I could never be an asset to any job. The first year of sobriety I got my GED, and went on to college. It was tough but I did it. I did a lot of volunteer work to put together a resume and landed a part time job while I attended school. I say this to say ~ in sobriety, I believe anything is possible ~ I didn't get rich, but I now have a job that pays my bills and allows me to have a few extras in life....I am comfortable and that's enough today. Anything is possible if I do not drink 1 day at a time.
Blessings and love
Terry

Freedom1990 09-18-2008 01:10 PM

50 years old, and this old bat is in college full-time. My currently disability (degenerative disc disease) no longer allows me to work the jobs I worked for so many years.

It's never too late to make a career change and take the necessary steps to achieve that goal.

I am living proof!

Tommyh 09-18-2008 02:51 PM

put it in God`s hands and leave it there and it will return to you better than what it is now


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