midknight

Thanks everyone for the replies they have helped a lot. Well it's certainly kicking around in her head. She been saying if we both go sober for 90 days (I'm voluntarily joining her) like the therapist recommended that we won't be able to drink at "X" events coming up! I said we'll deal with it and probably have fun!
No commitment from her. She's been out drinking 4 nights this week! All social engagements but still 3 of the 4 she's been pretty drunk. I told her that I'm not going to tell her she shouldn't drink or keep track of how much she does drink. This is her problem and it's her business. I find myself WANTING to ask but I don't. I taste the words on my lips and then swollow them. I let that go. I want her to SEE so badly her problem but I keep reminding myself that she is the captain on her ship to sobriety! Only she can decide if she's going to chart that coarse. I gotta remember I'm not on her ship and that I'm the captain of my own ship and if she decides to chart a coarse into dangerous waters that I need to chart my own coarse. The winds are a changing, storms ahead or clear skies only higher powers know!

One question for me still lingers. How long do I wait for her to get herself into some kind of treatment (AA & counceling)?
I'm thinking a month, any opinions on that? More time?

Remember that fears are rarely as scary as they seem when you face them and the inverse of this is that you are stronger than you think and you'll find the strength when you try!

Stay strong my newfound friends,

-Midknight

BikerBill8

Hey MidKnight, Ask her if she is willing to go with you to a meeting. But she has to really want to stop drinking it is up to her to make that choice. Be Cool BikerBill8

MootPoint

I agree with Bill. Tell her that she DOES NOT need to be an alcoholic to go to a meeting! There are no limitations to open meetings. If she decides she wants to stop drinking, the only requirement for AA membership is a desire to stop drinking. You don't have to be an alcoholic.

Then, if she decides she's an alcoholic but doesn't like AA, there are plenty of alternative programs out there. There is a link on the opening page of this site on the bottom right

You might want to check out Al Anon, at least the Al Anon forums on this board. Al Anon is for family members/spouses/etc who are living with alcoholics. In fact, I'd copy and paste your original post into that forum.

Good luck to you!

Chy

Midknight,

Like you said your the captain of your own ship. I just want to say I think it's awesome how you are there for her! She's a lucky girl to have a guy like you.