Harley3801

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To me, sober means clean.

I couldn't consider myself clean if I were using any conscience altering substance that wasn't legally prescribed to me or used by me as it was intended.

It's his decision but most people I know who have been in his situation, have changed their sobriety dates.

I would.

FightingIrish

This isn't an AA forum I don't think...

CarolD

No....
It's not the Alcoholism 12 Step Forum
and all are welcome to share here

Not all the replies on this thread
are from AA ...we try to share
from our own experiences. ..

Freedom1990

I want to thank you for your honesty and your post was obviously from the heart! :ghug3

sailorjohn

Whether he should or not is up to him, it's his program, how honestly he wants to work is also up to him. Yeah, it is a good lesson to learn, stopping drinking doesn't all of a sudden make us saints, I feel that hopefully it just gives us an opportunity to look at ourselves and the things that we do. For me, I can be ridiculously judgmental, I need to focus on the principles of the program and not the individuals.

jnj

I have a year of sobriety-not drinking but I smoke pot....pot saved my life. I know people think it will lead to relapse but not for me. After pancreatitis twice in the hospital for 3 weeks with a tube up my nose and down my throat and I didn't stop. I relapsed the last time I went to re-hab and then checked myself into detox a week later and came home and went to meetings and smoke when I want. No one in the world can convince me they are the same or cause same reactions/ life consequences.

If I drink I will die...I was ready to die..the doctor could have said you can't drink again..(probably did) and that was ok ...I'd die young....I couldn't stop.
Pot has had the opposite effect of leading me to relapse..knowing I can relax and smoke and enjoy myself from time to time and pass on the drink has kept me "sober" for a year now. I tell everyone who knows about my alcoholism and recovery that I smoke...I'm honest..of course not in AA but not one person has said " shame on you, you're not sober" they all KNOW how bad I was ...I was killing myself and everyone around me.....

I don't black out on pot
I don't let pot control my life
I don't sleep with strangers on pot
I haven't lost a job over pot
I don't smoke pot before and during work
I don't wake up in the morning and smoke or in the middle of the night
I dont' get withdraw and shakes when I dont' smoke
I haven't been in legal trouble since smoking pot
I don't get depressed when I smoke
I don't kill my pancreas and liver with pot
I don't become suicidal on pot
Pot is the only drug I know of given out by doctors for medicinal reasons...
Pot is natural, been around forever...
pot wears off in a matter of minutes-not hours....

Do you really think if someone is dieing and desperate...struggling with an hour/ a day / a week of sobriety that if they tried pot instead of alcohol and it helped them for those weeks /months/ years/ their loved ones wouldn't be grateful? Everyone is not the same...I know people are trying to be helpful and worry it will cause relapse but everyone is different. I'm living proof that I haven't had a single sip in a year and last year at this time I was in a suicidal...on the psyche ward after my last ( hopefully) relapse...I checked out after the mandatory 3 day hold and started smoking.
No one can take my year away and if I drink I'll die it's that simple if smoking allows me more power to pass on alcohol so be it.
I thank GOD I'm sober and if I thank pot once in awhile oh well....

serenityqueen

jnj, although I'm glad to hear that you haven't found it necessary to drink in a year, I feel that smoking pot isn't being completely clean and sober.

If your Dr. legitimately prescribes it, that's different.

I have know many people who have went into treatment for "just smoking pot."

Many, many people have been arrested and have went to prison for "just smoking pot."

You said you don't wake up and smoke or smoke before or during work. When I first started using and drinking, I never did any of those things either.

I know many who have lost jobs because they smoked pot. Having pot show up on a pre employment drug screen has kept many people from getting jobs. If you are caught under the influence of smoking pot while at work, chances are you're going to get the boot.

There are women (and men) out there who DO sleep with strangers while they are high or in order to get high.

I could go on and on, but bottom line is, IMO, you are justifying using a drug that is illegal and is just that, a drug. I could get on here and say that since I quit using pills and alcohol, snorting coke has helped me stay clean and sober but, a drug is a drug is a drug . . . I think if a newcomer read your post it could possibly give out the wrong message.

Some who are "only alcoholic" can use other substances without becoming addicted. But the chances are pretty darn high that smoking pot can and will lead to other drug/alcohol usage. Kinda like a game of Russian Roulette I don't care to play. I don't feel you could win any arguements saying that smoking pot has helped you stay sober.


Just my honest opinion,
Judy

nandm

Serenity queen, thank you for your thoughtful and tactful insight. Your words are much more elequent and convey better my thoughts on the subject than I could have done. Thanks for your post

Dee74

JNJ I defend your right to believe what you want.

I hope noone takes your post as a recommendation tho because I've been every bit as hooked on weed as booze.

Bondage is still bondage IMO - but that's my personal view based on my personal experience and firsthand observations.

I don't expect you or anyone else to share it, but I wanted to put it out there in the public record.

jnj

I appreciate everyone's opinion and I know it "can" lead to other drugs but alcohol never lead me to coke, ecstasy, crack, heroin, meth...for you to compare coke to pot is insane.....a drug is a drug yes that doesn't mean they're all the same just like a beer doesn't have as much alcohol as a shot of 100 proof....it's still liquor but to a different degree...when I was drinking 24/ 7 I almost lost my job but by GOD's grace...didn't....been there 4 years and I make good money...

I guess people will miss the point...I've seen and know and dealt with tooooo many people that are literally DIEING.....losing their families/jobs/ suicidal....and I am saddened and feel helpless they don't want to stop drinking....all I'm saying is if you were the family member or spouse and someone was dieing....in front of you...do you really think they'd be upset to have a year sober even if it meant they smoked?
DO you think they'd say....I'd rather give back that year of sobriety from alcohol since you smoke somtimes..I'd rather have you drink yourself to death for a day/ week /month than to smoke....I'm not talking about everyday.......
Yes of course you'll go to jail if you're caught with pot.....Do you know how many times I drove drunk? I'm so ashamed and embarassed and am lucky I didin't kill anyone...
The DR didn't give it to me...I wasn't saying that just that alcohol has NEVER been presecribed for cancer or glaucoma or anything else nor has coke or meth. And my psychiatrist-who specialize in addiction KNOWS I smoke and said to me " give me a high person over a drunk one anytime, and although I can't condone it because of my job....I'm very open about it" ....I didnt' tell her until months into therapy....she said " you still got yourself sober the pot didn't " and she's right .......I could just drink AND smoke...

I am really open about the fact I smoke....not to impress or give anyone the wrong idea but because I never state I'm "sober" without the disclaimer...I smoke to those I know...

All I'm trying to say is be a little more open.....I guess I have seen really really really bad alcoholics...I was one...suicidal last year...and if it works and it has for me personally for a year....then you can have my sober date back....I don't care because I'm not DEAD.....and if I kept drinking...I be dead/ in jail or an instituion right now NO DOUBT!!!!!!

Of course I don't want to give the newcomers the "wrong" idea...but so many people just can't quit...for a day or a week if smoking helped them quit alcohol.....I feel it's the lesser of 2 evils and I don't smoke all the time...it deters me from relapse because instead of drink I can relax in my home and it's natural.

nandm

While I respect your right to your opinion, I still have mine.
An escape from reality is still an escape from reality whether it is alcohol, pot, crack, meth, coke, or any other drug/drink.
Sobriety is more than abstinence from a substance. It is learning how to live within our own skin without the feeling that we need to escape from reality. Everyone has bad and stressful days but the difference is that the sober person does not look to a drug or drink to escape or "relax" after a hard day.

lostbutterfly

I'm glad smoking worked for you, better than being dead. I gave up ages ago because I was sick of coming down in the morning to a big mess in the kitchen from the gigantic meal I had cooked while stoned the night before!!! I've spent years just swapping one drug for another, but that's just me.

Peter

Well said.

kj3880

To My Alcoholic Friends:ghug3:

I go to AA sometimes instead of NA, although I never had a problem with alcohol yet. Yet being the key word. So I'm open to the possibility that although my problem so far is drugs, if I mess around w/alcohol, I could end up in the misery of active addiction once again. AA has helped me to see what alcohol can do to a person. And of course, NA's stance is that alcohol is a drug, too.

Although this isn't the "NA Forum," I offer with love a simple suggestion for all alcoholics that doubt whether or not drugs can make your life just as unmanageable as alcohol did: Go to a couple NA meetings, with an open mind, just as many from NA go to occasional AA meetings. I urge you to do this if you don't think drug use can get progressive on your @ss just like alcohol did. The stories you hear from addicts may well help you decide not to "go there." Just because it might not affect your AA DOS, doesn't mean drug abuse (or even what is called "recreational drug use", whatever that is.) is a good option for an alcoholic.

To all addicts and to my "just an alcoholic" friends: Do we really, any of us, need to experiment with any more mind-altering substances to find out where it may take us? Do we really need that???? To borrow an AA term "I think not."

Love from:
A grateful, to NA and AA, recovering addict,
KJ

PS: If you take my suggestion and check out an NA meeting, feel free to introduce yourself as "Hi I'm So-and-So, an addict," since we include you alcoholics as addicts, too. And Welcome!

sailorjohn

Alcohol is also natural, isn't like they synthesize it in a lab somewhere. Our distant ancestors stumbled upon it quite by accident, then figured out how to make the stuff themselves. And while a beer may not be the equivalent of a 100 proof shot, it is the equivalent of a 80 proof shot, IIRC. Key words, you use the weed to relax in my home. Changing the way you feel, with a chemical. Natural or not. A last thought, if you all of a sudden can't get the weed, how will you relax?

LosingmyMisery

Two wrongs don't' make a right. Sober is sober. I don't consider smoking pot as a sober activity. I can understand why you say you smoke pot, but I can't relate to it. I never have really liked pot. Smoked it a few times, it wasn't really my thing. However, I think if I were to smoke it it would lead to drinking. That is my opinion on that. You are aware of the consequences if you get caught so it is your choice to continue to use.

You do know that the federal government does classify pot in the same category as heroin, not so insane of a comparison after all. You know what they say about it being a gateway drug, but that is a whole other topic. In my personal opinion, if someone is using an illegal substance to alter their mood, they are not sober.

For the record, I don't think driving under the influence of pot is such a great idea either. I want to reiterate that I'm glad you aren't killing yourself with booze. That is a good thing, but smoking pot is really hard on your lungs. It isn't healthy and I don't think it is a very good substitute for sobriety.

Sorry, I don't mean to become argumentative, but I can find lots to disagree with in your post. Kinda seems as if you are trying to justify your drug use and there really isn't any good justifications and far as I can see.

jnj

Ok I knew no one one "get it" .....

I didn't say I smoke and drive...I don't ....I said I used to drink and drive to many times to count....and that's scary.

I'm not justifying myself.....It doesn't matter to me what people think or I wouldn't have been honest knowing people would be all over this...I'm only saying I personally and I only I.....personally believe pot helped me through my year of "not drinking": ......I know it's a drug, I know it's illegal, I know it's mind altering........I'm only saying if I had to chose between DEATH and POT I chose POT...I see too many friends constantly not able to stop drinking. People on here and other sites that can't make it a day without a drink...I'm not saying they should go smoke...I'm saying if it would save someone's life you loved ....you wouldn't try it? I see desperate, desperate people that would give anytyhing to have a year....if pot was involved so be it. Again... my friends are so proud of me no one is saying...but you're still smoking.....becasue they know what a true MIRACLE and only from GOD that I'm even "sober"....
Sorry, I"m not SOBER ...I don't know what other word to use to say I haven't had a sip of alcohol in a year. I associate drunk with sober....drugs with clean and yes alcohol is a drug...I went to plenty of rehabs....

It's not important anymore..>I was just trying to be honest

I don't smoke every day.....so to "relax" ......I go to the dog park/ watch tv/ go to the gym...etc.....I guess everyone thinks my pot smoking is constant as alcohol was and it isn't.....It's just there if I want it

I can't explain it and I'm not justyifying it.. my life has turned arond, I"m a different person, every aspect of my life is great now without alcohol...and no one can take that away.....just because I smoke doesn't mean I don't have good advice and helpful advice (besides smoking) for other people...
I"m still an alcoholic.....pot is the lesser of 2 evils and I know everyone will say it leads to relapse or other drugs that's why I waited a year to make sure it didn't FOR ME>.....and yes it could still any day....but it hasn't.... and a day without alcohol muchless a year in my book is PRICELESS

Tazman53

I felt that bore repeating.... thanks kj.

An excellent question John, I loved grass when I was younger as much as I loved booze, as I grew older I grew a bit wiser and the fact that grass could get you 5 years in the pen for a single jay in those days made me decide to pick booze as my DOC.

A few questions for you to ponder jnj.

Did you start of your drinking career drinking alcoholicly or did you progressively get worse with time in your drinking?

I did not start off drinking every day, my disease progressed, the longer I drank, the more often I drank and the more I drank, until finally I had no choice, I had to drink every day just to function.

jnj do you know any pot heads? I would suggest you consider checking out the drug forum here, pot is not always a gateway drug, it can become a major issue all by itself for many people who just used it occasionally to relax at first.

One more quick question just to ponder about, do you think smoking pot could be a progressive problem?

digderidoo

jnj,

I have read your posts with interest.

When i first attended AA and first had the intention of giving up alcohol, i used to think that may be i could smoke pot once in a while. My pot smoking has never been a serious problem, i could always take it or leave it.

The thing for me though is because of attending AA, i have had to learn how to deal with reality and deal with life on life's terms. Because i could take or leave pot, i have chosen to leave it. I feel so glad to have a clear state of mind and feel the pot would alter that.

I get the sense that you have used pot at times to relax you, when sometimes a drink would do that. It has obviously helped you to give up drink, instead of working a program.

I guess the danger is that many can substitute pot for alcohol. Many addicts have a tendency to get addicted to other things, not just alcohol, so in this respect i personally would be against any sort of recreational drug use, in my case.

At the end of the day we are all going to do exactly what we want, so it's pointless me criticising anyone for whatever their stance is. All i can say is that even though i can take or leave pot, i feel alot happier not touching anything that's mind altering.

Paul

fotographia

If someone does smoke herb or takes other drugs then yes they would have to change when they got sober since they're getting high on drugs.

I know people who claim that they are "sober" and they don't drink but they smoke pot or use other drugs, so they are not sober or clean at all.