soupdragon1973

I went to AA a few times last year and it may sound odd but because I didnt drink everyday I felt it was somehow wrong for me to introduce myself and refer to myself as an alcoholic,as though I was making light of the people around me.When is someone defined as an alcoholic now?The stereotype is of someone who cant get through a single day without drinking but I was more a binge drinker,when I got the urge which could be at any time of the day but not everyday.Sometimes 4-5 times a week,sometimes as little as once or twice.The nurse I saw here who reccomended putting me on a programme made an assesment and said I had dependency issues.I dont have a problem calling myself an alcoholic but at the same time it seems I am making light of people who drank more frequent and heavier than myself.I just needed to clarify.I guess it could be defined as someone who relies on alcohol to get through life,drinks too often and it affects the life and has a negative impact very often,I guess not about intake but more about impact and lifestyle.

bostonluv

You just answered your own question

soupdragon1973

LOL.....I often do that!! Thanks bostonluv!

ytytyt

Yeah, I know what you mean. Lots of people have a much harder time of things than I do, and using the same label as them somehow feels like I am trying to 'cheapen' or 'lessen' their hardship, which I'm not.
As a result I was reluctant to use the word.
However, in a sense, for me, someone is defined as an alcoholic the second they say "I am an alcoholic",

1963comet

Had a family member stop by here yesterday. This is a person I thought was an alcoholic. Would of bet my life on it. Anyway he just stopped drinking about 6 months ago and has not had the desire to drink. Said himself that he does not miss it and does not want it anymore.

I really don't know how this works as far as being called an alcoholic. Was told that I was alcoholic when I was 22 and just excepted that. But I just quit over 7 years ago. Do not have the desire to drink at all.

CarolD

The only thing you need to join AA is a desire to quit drinking.

It might be wise to return ...llisten for simlarties not differences.
We AA'ers don't care
what you drank...how you drank or when you drank.

Yes..you can quit and find a new healthier life.
Good to see you here ...

CarolD

From my files...hope it helps

Progression Of Alcoholism
Here's how alcoholism typically progresses:

SOCIAL DRINKERS — Most Americans are characterized as social drinkers. Statistics indicate, however, that one of every 16 drinkers will become alcoholic.
WARNING SIGNS — The individual begins to drink more frequently and more than his associates. He drinks for confidence or to tolerate or escape problems. No party or other occasion is complete without a couple of drinks.

EARLY ALCOHOLISM — With increasing frequency, the individual drinks too much. "Blackouts," or temporary amnesia, occur during or following drinking episodes. He drinks more rapidly than others, sneaks drinks and in other ways conceals the quantity that he drinks. He resents any reference to his drinking habits.

BASIC ALCOHOLISM — The individual begins to lose control as to the time, place and amount of his drinking. He gets drunk unintentionally. He hides and protects his liquor supply. He drinks to overcome the hangover from his prior drinking. He tries new patterns of drinking as to time and place of drinking. He attempts cures by moving to new locations or by changing his drinking companions.

CHRONIC ALCOHOLISM — The individual becomes a loner in his drinking. He develops alibis, excuses and rationalizations to cover up or explain his drinking. Personality and behavior changes occur that affect all relationships — family, employment, community. Extended binges, physical tremors, hallucinations and delirium, complete rejection of social reality, malnutrition with accompanying illness and disease and early death all occur as chronic alcoholism progresses.


Source: American Medical Association

soupdragon1973

I saw many similarities between me and others at AA,just that somehow I felt unworthy to be there when I heard some awful tales on intoxication that lasted over weeks,months whatever but I understand what your saying,I will give it another shot in a few weeks after I re-locate back to my home town

SlvrMag

I am an addict. I just recently decided to stop drinking although I don't consider myself an alcoholic. I could easily become one--because I AM an addict--I guess I can call it preventative maintenance!?

Hawkeye1926

...and I thought I was the only one. Thanks for posting this! I had the same experience. When I went to my first AA meeting 3 years ago (wow!) I felt out of place. Not judged or anything, but like you said...that I was "insulting" ones who have seen more negative than I have. Yet, I'm thankful. Thankful in that I realized the path I was on before I lost everything. I look back on it now, and even though I felt as if I was "wrong" I'm glad I had a mental reality check. It would've been VERY easy for me to just say to myself "well, you aren't THAT bad.." and kept going. And, for a while, I tired....and failed. I've taken a lot of psychology both on a university level and a personal level through various therapists. While I don't meet the "medical" criterion for addiction, I know I can't drink. Do I consider myself an alcoholic. Yes. Becasue I'm not a "social" drinker. I can't be, and I know that about myself. I can't just have one drink, and you know what...even if I could...I don't think I would. I don't miss it, and I never will.

There's the medical "diagnosis" of alcoholism/addiction, but then to me there's a personal one. I ask myself "is it worth it?" Are the potential consequences worth one night/day/incident? No. If you and you alone can determine that where you are in life...you see the train coming and you know it wont' be good...you make a change. I'm just rambling now at this point. Yet, I understand...in more ways than one. I just hope it all makes sense.

TryingSoHard

I've read on the AA web site...

If you can't control how much you drink once you start
If you've ever told yourself you aren't going to drink and then you do anyway
If you have blackouts
If you hide your alcohol or the quantity that you drink from others

you may be an alcoholic (or be on the path to becoming one).

I think it's definitely about how it affects your life and your body once you start drinking, not about how often you drink. If the alcohol has power over you and you can not control yourself or your behavior once you start drinking, that can't be a good thing.

Just my two cents.

Dean62

A friend of mine asked a recently retired professor to define addiction. After over 30 years in the field of addiction his response was. "The moment we do something for the purpose of changing the way we feel".

ColdSweat

Hey hon. I was a binge-drinker too. I didn't drink everyday, I probably would have if it was available to me, I constantly had the desire to get wasted... but when I did drink, I would just drink and drink and drink 'til I couldn't drink no more - until it was all gone, I was passing out, or puking over and over. It became a sick goal that I didn't have control over - to get as trashed as possible in the shortest amount of time. I was what I would call a "pounder", just one drink after the other, so I didn't have to feel like I was alive. After a year or two of doing that, plus pill-popping everyday (I am also an addict), I realized I was an alcoholic, and an addict. I call myself an addict because I was/am dependant on the pills. I call myself an alcoholic because I didn't control it, it controlled me, same as the pills really. And it was ruining all of my relationships with people I loved, and my family. And it ruined my health something awful. An alcoholic is anyone who is suffering unconciously from drinking. An admitted alcoholic realizes this when they're at their "bottom", and the rest, as they say, is history.

vegibean

I like boston and CarolID's responses, they're both right. It's hard to say who is an alcoholic. I believe YOU are the only one that can really decide that. Things for me were just out of control, I had no control and my life revolved around alcohol EVERYDAY!!!!!

It doesn't hurt to go to meetings either. I believe they have a lot to offer. Before I had gotten really bad I went, go sober for a very short while and was "back out" there but I'm so glad I went to those meetings. I say I got to do some "research" that was useful in the future when I KNEW that I needed help.

Good luck to you!!!!

tommyk

When is someone defined as an alcoholic?

When they say they are.

(The unfortunate ones often remain in denial.)

soupdragon1973

so.....and by my own definition and considering all I've read....I am an alcoholic,it controlled me and not I controlled it and also it was ruining my life.I assumed it was down to intake but not in my case,I was dependent upon and felt unable to quit even when hitting rock bottom.I thought I was in control of it and had a choice,the only choice I had it seems was to take anta-abuse and become sober.

soupdragon1973

I was concious of my suffering and the emotional impact and fallouts it caused but still a part of me was in denial....I mean thinking **** you to everyone,I am going to drink regardless is a sort of denial right?

soupdragon1973

Thank you to everyone

Pinkcuda

That's exactly the reason that drunkalogs and war stories are discouraged. (by me and hopefully others) Some people can't relate to them and they may rethink their position over their powerlessness. There is no place in a meeting for this. We are here to talk about a common solution to our common problem. If anyone wants to tell drunk stories I suggest they go to Denneys after the meeting.
We don't have a rating scale such as a "Level 1" Alcoholic or a "level 5" Alcoholic etc.. Either you are, or you aren't. There is no middle ground.
I suggest you spend some time in the Big Book reading "There is a Solution" starting on Pg.17 and that will explain exactly what an Alcoholic is.
The first page explains that we come from all walks of life and how the only thing we may have in common is our alcoholism. Our lifestyle, socio-economic, medical, criminal background does not play into the equation whatsoever.
The only thing we have in common is our inability to controll our alcohol intake once started. With regularity.

ANGELINA243

Exactly what I was going to say---thanks tommyk!