meadow04

I slipped last night after 4 days of sobriety. I'm so pissed. It was going so well and I really thought I had a handle on the whole thing. last night it just got so hard and I told myself I could have 1 glass of wine.... to take the edge off and then stop. 1 turned into another and another and another. At that point it was "why stop now?" I feel so ashamed and don't know how I am going to start all over again. Things are better with my husband and being Friday I don't know how I am going to face this from step one.
Why is this so hard? I would appreciate any advise.. Thanks in advance
Meadow

maloneshawn32

Don't get discouraged, I went down that road for years and then I just knew I had to do something. You made it four days, I really made it one. Next time go for five, after the fifth just decide to make it one minute longer and so on until the amount is six days. You can get there. Don't sweat the weekends, just take them one day at a time. Stay strong, you will get there.

ANGELINA243

I had to repeat the "first drink concept" many times before I finally got it. I now know that I am alcoholic--and will never be able to drink like other "normal" non-alcoholic people. One drink for me--sets it off>the "unquenchable thirst" (or allergy) as some call it. Relapse isn't always a bad thing necessarily--if you can learn something useful from the experience. Do you think you can have one drink and stop now? Don't beat yourself up...you can start over today.

CarolD

Many of us had false starts
on on our way to solid sobriety.

The key for me was
I had to want to quit
more than I wanted to drink.

Yes...that included weekend sloshes.


Blessings to you and your family

TorontoGuy28

Dust off and try again, the worst thing you can do is quit trying !

LosingmyMisery

I had to learn not to drink. I couldn't do it on my own. Seek out knowledge through programs.

Anna

Hi Meadow,

Yes, it is very hard, but you can do it.

You can find new and better ways to cope with difficult feelings.

Kellye C

In the beginning I lasted 4 days too. From Tuesday to Friday. Went out to sing kareoke and honestly thought I could just go sing and not drink. My drinking friends saw I wasn't drinking and decided to correct that situation. I didn't turn it down. It turned into 28 more days of drinking while going to meeting pretending to still be sober. It was H*LL. Finally I had enough and decided if I was going to do this thing then now was the time. I'll spare you the graphic thought that went through my mind but basically it was a very crude version of get off your butt and do it!!

I went to a meeting, fessed up, picked up another desire chip and dove in. That was a little over 4 years ago now. Don't give up. You can do this! Take it from me though, the longer you put it off the harder it will be. Just get right back up on the horse NOW!!! Don't wait til the weekends over. Do it now.

Best to you!
Kellye

deezaldog

Great job on getting 4dys sober. The point I get is you realized what you did and still want to change. Failure is when you stop trying.
I learned that taking the "just for now, don't drink' approach helped me.
All we ask is for a reprieve from drinking today.
The worst thing for you to do is beat yourself up over your stumble.
Give yourself credit for posting today and keep going the best you can.
Most of all keep trying. LOL

Pinkcuda

My advise, since you asked, is to quit sugarcoating the truth by calling it a "Slip" or saying "Fell off the Wagon"
That makes it sound like an accident. Nobody in recovery drinks by accident.

TryingSoHard

Hi Meadow.

Today was my Day 4 and today I chose to drink again. Yes, it was a conscious choice. I can't even blame it on anything... just me. I wasn't particularly craving, I wasn't particularly stressed out... I just thought that having a drink was a "good" thing to do tonight. After all, it had been since Monday!

*sigh*

Right now I'm still buzzed and don't much give a crap, but tomorrow I will feel like sh!t for sure. How about me and you start over together? I do plan on beating this... I really do. I'll hold your hand if you'll hold mine.

Maybe together we can make it.

LosingmyMisery

Together is a good thing. I never had much luck making it on my own.

HideorSeek

Ditto Tryingso hard. I too, lost it last night. I seem to be able to make it for a few days, then I drink for one, then put a few days together...I know that I've said it b4, but I really feel like I"ve had it. There is no way I can continue to go on this way. It is a dead end, literally.

For some reason, I am now scared and fear is driving me forward. I can't look ahead and must focus just on today. :praying

CarolD

Hmm...
I just came home from my regular AA meeting.
32 people there...and no one drank yesterday.

No AA is not the only way....
but I see recovery miracles in each meeting.