GrapeApe

Well it took me close to 2 weeks but I finally told her. Sadly enough I had to be really drunk to bring it up. Fortunately now it's out in the open we are able to discuss it while sober. She has been great about it. She is stopping drinking altogether as well to support me. I've also booked some time with a counsellor in a few weeks.

I'm still struggling to find a good doctor but I'll get there.

serenityqueen

CarolD

Thanks for checking back with us...

Best wishes for a healthy positive future

Dee74

good work GA...keep updating us!

D

Cathy31

[QUOTE=GrapeApe;1887350] I've also booked some time with a counsellor in a few weeks.

[QUOTE]

Welcome Grape! This does not sound promising (few weeks sounds a bit loose)

Your g/f sounds great - and I understand your feelings on AA that you'll try it if you feel ready and your counsellor suggests it. As a fellow alcoholic I'm suggesting it to you right now, right here .I've been to AA meetings in Adelaide and they're awesome = group lover or not it will keep you sober.

You've done the big step = coming clean with your g/f and acknowledging your problem. Now, into action. AA works. Try it. If you don't like it tick it off and go onto next step/solution. Why not?

Cathy31
x

GrapeApe

[QUOTE=Cathy31;1888504][QUOTE=GrapeApe;1887350] I've also booked some time with a counsellor in a few weeks.

A few weeks is the best they could do. It's in 3 weeks time I think. I've got the date here (17th September). I could have gone in a week earlier but I'm off for a business trip. Apparently it's just the first one that's hard to book in as I am a new patient. Repeats are pretty quick (so they say).

My girl has been great about it. She wants to help and is very supportive. It took a bit to convince her I had a problem but she is now determined to help me stop.

And in regards to AA. It's still a maybe. It depends what the counsellor recommends and how I am finding myself going. You said you went to the meetings in Adelaide? Which one did you find best? There's a few around the place and the closest one is in an area I'm not comfortable to visit so I've looked around a bit.

Thanks for your input!

Cathy31

Hey Grape

Gosh there were so many to choose from I swear about 60 or so meetings in the region alone so 10 a day to choose from. I liked the city centre one - I always like the city centre meetings when I'm abroad e.g. Clapham in London - it's horrifying but reminds me of where I'll go if I pick up! Also park something - park lane/parkside? Also LOVED my meetings in melbourne and sydney.

Cathy31
x

GrapeApe

Well I am on day 6 now (second longest time in 8 years).

I haven't had:

• the shakes
• nausea
• paranoia
• sweating
• hallucinations

What I have had is a lot of cravings for alcohol (beer more specifically). It's lunch time Monday and I really feel like a beer The weekend was harder. Friday night was always my "cut loose" night as I had 2 days to recover.

I accomplished quite a lot on the weekend which was a nice reward. I am a bit moody though. What is hard is that I am so unsure which emotions to trust. When something pisses me off - is it the withdrawal or should I really be pissed off. Is that person really so annoying or is it just withdrawal etc.

GrapeApe

I'm on day 9 now. I feel ok. Last night was pretty hard - I had such intense cravings for alcohol that I turned into a grumpy pain in the arse! Fortunately I didn't want to disappoint my girlfriend so I told her how much I needed a drink and she just kept saying no. That must have happened at least 10 times.

I am sleeping a lot (well 7-8 hours a night) but still finding I wake up exhausted. I hope that stops soon as right now waking up for work is just as hard as when I was hungover. I was actually late for work today because I couldn't wake up - something that only happens if I drink a lot more than normal).

Whenever I had a hangover I got really anxious about things. I would worry about my work a lot. When I took a 2 day break (quitting ) that anxiety was lifted which happened this time too - however it seems to have come back to me at about day 7. I have had an anxiety disorder since I was a child but have been drunk/drugged most of the time since I was 15 so I don't really know if I have grown out of it or not. Perhaps the anxiety is caused by my disorder or perhaps it is withdrawal. I don't really know. Anyone got any experience on this to share?

Tazman53

congrats on 10 days now, the sleep deal gets better with time, it varies greatly from person to person so just give it time and it will get better.

The anxiety was a bear for me at first, but the longer I went without a drink and the more I worked on my recovery the less anxious I was. I devoted as much time to my recovery as I did to drinking which was a whole lot of time!!! LOL

My councelor in detox suggested that and I found it worked for me, I went to at least one meeting a day for months, I prayed, meditated, and read recovery books as well as speaking on the phone with other recovering alcoholics. I continue to work on my recovery every day, I have cut back on my meetings, but go to extra meetings if things are getting a little squirrely. I spend time every week helping other alcoholics in their recovery and have found that they help me more then I help them, which is kind of cool.

I have found that the more time I focus on helping others and being of service the less I think about me. The obsession and cravings for a drink have been gone for a long time and I really do enjoy living life on lifes terms. Hang in there, take it one day at a time knowing it will get better with time. Oh there will still be bad days, but bad days are not as bad when one is not hung over or feeling guilty about what they did or may have done the night before drunk.

doorknob

I'm on day 16 and am experiencing the same exact thing. I'm 39 and have had OCD since I was a teenager, and generalized and panic anxiety since my mid 20's. The last few mornings I've been waking up with the kind of anxiety I would have after a night where I drank more than usual. I'm also not feeling well rested, even after a full nights sleep.

GrapeApe

Thanks for that guys. It is reassuring to know that the anxiety is normal (I think I already did but I was worried I was wrong - how circular is that logic).

I had a relatively easy day today which was surprising (it's just about bed time on day 9). I went out to dinner and there were bottles of champagne and wine all over the table. I had to pretend I was on antibiotics so I couldn't drink. I hate lying but I am not ready to tell the whole world I am recovering - and these people have seen me drink wine many times before.

What I don't understand is why that was such an easy challenge. The night before was almost impossible and all I did was cook dinner and have a friend (non-drinker) over for dinner.

I'll keep checking in and updating my progress through the days.

Homer38

I,too,have an anxiety problem.I cant beleive how many alcoholics have "anxiety",its as hard to talk about as alcoholism unfortunately.I for one turned to beer,well more than couple dozen beers and weed to releive my anxiety.Only thing I knew but didnt wanna accept was the drinking makes anxiety/panic/depression twice as bad when we arent drinking.The next day after drinking were not hangovers for me,they were the start of a highly anxious day until I got my 2nd beer down in me.Just a huge circle thats been going on for years with every drinking day taking more away from my tolerance to anxiety.

I shouldnt be posting so much as I only have 7 days this time around but feel my mind is clear enough to share how I feel.

doorknob

For me, some days/nights are just easier than others. My girlfriend and I sing karaoke, and that always involves alcohol and drunk people. There's nights where it doesn't bother me at all, and nights where I start wishing I could drink (or kill the drunk people). I think it just depends on where I'm at that day.

Tazman53

Homer time sober matters not, if you are sober today you have the ability to share your experience, strength, and hope. Your shareing is helping people with more and with less sobriety then you.

Homer I am one of those alcoholics who developed anxiety issues due to drinking, I started drinking to fit in, show off, to be the man!!! I loved the effects of it for many years, I fit in with any crowd, I was a ladies man, I was basically anything I wanted to be when I was drinking.

Once I had progressed far enough in my disease the anxiety set in, the only releif for it was drinking, when I was sober the anxiety would set in with a vengance!

I am among the lucky alcoholics whose anxiety has all but dissappeared due to staying sober long enough and applying the steps in my daily life.

Oh I still get a bit anxious about somethings, but it never last long and it does not consume my entire being like it used to.

Every one is different, for some I have heard it lessens with sobriety but is still bad, for others simply being sober made no difference at all, being sober and working the steps made the difference.

If one has been sober for a while and still has bad anxiety issues seeing a shrink is a good idea.

Tazman53

DK just something to think about, especially in early sobriety, but in the rooms I have heard more then one person share that they learned the hard way that:

doorknob

Taz, we go about once a week and usually on a weeknight, when people are there to sing as opposed to getting drunk. Having that mic in my hand and hearing my voice fill the room is one of the best natural highs I've ever experienced, and I have a girlfriend that loves singing more than I do. If you take that away from me, you may as well hand me a bottle at the same time. But, I do understand what you're saying.

Tazman53

DK we have karaoke every once in a while at some of our AA events in my area, you would have a blast, no drunk hecklers!!!! LOL