slacker

I thought quitting drinking would make me happier, less screwing around with the system and fewer ups and downs. I quit for 15 months, then started drinking again. During those 15 months I started on two antidepressants and cigarettes. I quit the cigarettes almost a week ago, substituting the patch.
Such a wreck, seeking any advice.

tommyk

When you start caring again think about quitting drinking with help from NA/AA.

There's more to the problem than simply the alcohol.

suki44883

I don't believe you no longer care because you wouldn't be here if that were the case. Don't give up, slacker. 15 months is FANTASTIC!! Perhaps you would benefit by attending AA/NA meetings. If nothing else, you would be exposed to a group of people who understand what you are going through and offer practical support. We at SR can only do so much, but face-to-face support is so much better.

:praying you keep trying.

TorontoGuy28

Slacker - did you work any of the steps ?

I really needed to make peace with my past, before starting to feel better.

Pinkcuda

When I quit drinking my life didn't get any better either. It got worse. Mainly because I had unrealistic expectations of sobriety.
It wasn't until I got to the root cause of my drinking. I was miserable with myself and my life. When I quit I was miserable with myself and my life was a wreck but I couldn't run and hide inside a bottle anymore. I had to fix myself.
AA was the answer I was looking for. I had been going to meetings but I was just sitting there and listening. I was just taking up space in the meetings I was going to.
I don't think it says "rarely have we seen a person fail who sat around in meetings enough times" It says "thouroghly followed our path".
try it and see.

Raineydae

Life on Life's terms is hard but I agree with Pinkuda and Toronto Guy, having a program and working the steps gives you the strength and tools to deal with it.
Letting go was the best thing I did. Someone once told me after a meeting if you want to let go; stop holding on. I liked that.

Tazman53

I am with the others, just not drinking for me resulted in me beiing miserable, angry, irratable, deprerssed. The program of AA is what did the trick for me. Have you tried any recovery programs? AA is just one among many.

Change is the key I have found for me to be happy and sober. To just not drink changed nothing about me, I was still the same self centered, egotist with an inferiority complex, I still got depressed over things and angry over other things. I continued to blame every one and everything for every problem I had, I still had great fears of things.

In reality just not drinking made my life a living hell, I had to change me or I was going to drink and die.

SlvrMag

I'm an addict and several times in the past 7 years I got clean and was miserable! This time I go to NA and it helps me SO much! I want to be clean more than I want to use. I have 62 days and I'm generally happy. I have bad days too, but don't we all!

Astro

I remember you slacker, and I'm glad to see that you've reached out and posted for advice and support.

I can't add much to what's already been said, having a recovery plan and the program of AA has given me exactly what I needed to live a happy, peaceful, and rich life. I tried many times to just stop without a program, the result was a miserable dry drunk.

All abstinence and no spirituality made Astro a very dull boy. It was a pathetic way to live.

You don't ever have to feel this way again, please find something that works for you and stick with it.

CarolD

Good to see you again

I suggest you read your signature line
and then mine.

slacker

Dragging up a dead post

I have maintained sobriety since I started this thread over two years ago. Everything didn't get better overnight, duh.

Kmber2010

Well done Slacker and glad to see the update. I really do need to look at the dates on these posts...lol.

All the best!!

least

Well done on staying sober!! I too wanted my life to be better overnight... which often sent me back to drinking cause of feeling crappy... It took me most of two years to finally give my recovery a bit of time to really "recover" since it took me a while to dig that deep hole and a bit more time to get out of it.

Dee74

Good to see you again slacker - thanks for the update.

D

soidog

I think Taz hit the nail on the head, at least in my experience. Sobriety definitely DOES help. You shouldn't feel bad at all for being sober as long as you had been.

But in any case, after obtaining a comfortable level of sobriety where the physical and psychological addiction is gone (or manageable), a lot of us find that we have to work on ourselves socially. Alcoholism - at least for me- was absolute selfishness. After spending years and years drunk off your ass, locked in a room drinking, etc., acting like a total clown or whatever, we need to work on developing social skills that have basically been stunted. A big part of that is being able to deal with people and events/situations that just occur in life, some good, some bad.

For me, working on that social part was, and is, really important. Keep at it!

johndelko408

Seriously Slacker, 15 months is a lot of time to just **** it away in a bottle. For me alcohol wasn't my problem, I was my problem, the alcohol was but a symptom of my disease called addiction. I've quit many times before on my own and like you my life didn't feel any better. This was due to the fact that my perception on life, attitude and all around behaviors didn't change. I was still the emotionally disturbed person I was before, I just wasn't drinking or using. It wasn't until I started working the steps of alcoholics anonymous that my life started feeling better. I got connected to a God of my understanding, started reaching out to my fellows and most of all I got connected with myself. Honestly bro, my life is better now, not in a material sense, but in a spiritual sense. I had to take these steps and make these changes to my life if I wanted to feel comfortable in my own skin. Try the steps if you haven't and I'm sure that you will be amazed before you are halfway through. Seriously, you owe it to yourself to do it, not to anyone else. It does get better you just got to give it a try. The one thing you have to understand though is we still have to deal with the crappy aspects of life, that's life, we just don't have to drink. We learn how to deal with our troubles as opposed to hiding from them behind a bottle or pipe.

slacker

I found the greatest relief with diet and nutrition.

The 12 steps work for some people, they were useless for me. Insisting that the 12 steps is the ONLY way did me no good and only delayed my recovery as I kept trying the same thing and getting the same results.

My life isn't problem free by any means, these problems don't overwhelm me nowadays is the difference. I still have chronic pancreatitis and all the fun it brings, my wife spent our life savings and our marriage is beyond repair, my career is in serious jeopardy, money is extra tight; yet these all seem manageable now and I have no need to get drunk.