FightingIrish

You sound like me. I started drinking alcoholically and alone when I was in my early thirties. Drank sanely in public most of the time, when I got home I drank 'til I passed out. Didn't think I was hurting anyone except myself.

Thank god I got arrested when I took my drinking out on vacation. No DWI or anything: just drunk in public and felt the need to point out the wrongdoings of a few policemen. Note to self: no more pepper spray with contact lenses on...and those orange jumpsuits? Not my color...

TheBean

You can probably control your drinking for the rest of your life, but "the rest of your life" may be only fifteen years. I can almost guarantee that you won't have a long life as a functioning alcoholic.

Sorry to be blunt, but that's the grim reality.

Tazman53

Ready_To_Change, I could have written that exact statement about 10 years before I quit drinking.

I highly reccommend you do some research on the progression of alcoholism, I learned from experience that what researchers say on the progression of the disease is true. No need comparing bottoms, that really serves no purpose except possibly someone continuing to drink because they may feel they don't have a problem because they have not had certain things happen to them yet.

Suffice it to say that I was still a functioning alcoholic in the very end who was blessed with the ability to see that in less then a year every thing I was managing to hold onto were going to be gone if I continued drinking.

AA is what keeps me sober and happy today, it does not work for every one which is why there are other programs out there. If you have had enough and are ready to stop do as you plan to do, try AA, but really try it, be willing to do what ever it takes.

If you are following all the suggestions in AA and you are still drinking, do not give up, try working other programs, you will find sobriety if you keep working at it.

justanothrdrunk

Couple things:
1. There's no such thing as a "functional" alcoholic.
2. You've already hit bottom. You just don't know it yet.

BackToSquareOne

As Tazman said above it's the progression of the disease that's important. There are many functional drunks and not all progress to full blown alcoholism but it is a fine line between the two.

RufusACanal

If you think you can maintain functionality as a Drunk, then you are way ahead of millions. Of course, you may be unique. What is it going to be? Are you ready to change or are you blowing smoke? PM me if you are ready, I am willing to help.


Ron

LadyInRed

Hi Everyone, this is my first post. It's nice to meet y'all. I am only one day sober, and can really relate to this thread. Up until 3 months ago, I had the perfect job for an alcoholic - working off-site from where my employer was, and deluded myself that it would last forever. I drank almost every night and would basically be so hung over on a lot of mornings that I'd drag into work at 10:00 or 11:00 a.m, and kidded myself that no one really knew. This went on for almost two years. Suddenly, huge changes in corporate structure occurred and my little house of cards shattered and I realized I was just a cheating, lying alcoholic. For the past 3 months, I've been drinking and slow to find another job, which creates more stress because now the rent is due and I don't have the money. I have two interviews this week but I look and feel sick. The anxiety is kicking in big-time, and I'm so scared my heart races. I feel like my landlord will be understanding, but I have to find employment and get myself together before losing the house and possibly the car. I live with my boyfriend, and feel like I've failed him miserably. He's not in a position to pay all of the rent himself, so I just can't let us get evicted. He knows I was drinking beer every night but doesn't know about the whiskey I drank with it.

Last Call

I used to consider this functioning too. I am just over 4 months sober now, and I no longer look upon myself as a former functional alcoholic, just a drunk that settled for a lot less than I was capable of, whether I met someone else's definition of bottom or not.

LosingmyMisery

The one thing about being a functional alcoholic, when we cross the line, we are the last to know. The last to know that we've crossed the line and the problem has turned to the point of being scary. I remember wondering how in the hell did this happen? Even scarier yet, the problem continued to worsen and worsen... Yeah, we are the last to know. Then, it may be to late.

CarolD

Welcome to LadyInRed!

hope3

Hi ready, I'm going to a wake on Wednesday 8/6 for a 43 year old who said something very similar to you.....

We all will quit drinking someday, either while we are living, or after we die.

I Wish you the very best,

hope and love, Hope3

Tazman53

Ladyinred welcome to SR, start a thread of your own and reintroduce your self. Have you thought about going to AA or another recovery program?

TheMaster

I was also a functioning alcoholic (or am one, depending on your point of view). I never lost anything. Not in the material sense.

I have, however, lost all sense of society. Maybe it came from drinking, maybe not. I don't really know.

All I know is while I drank, I had more negative feelings than positive. Stopping has brought out more positive feelings.

Plus I don't feel like **** every Sat. & Sun. mornings and can do things like go ride off on my motorbike & take in the sights.

tlc123

Hi,
this is my first time writing about this to anyone other than my journal but I am married to a functional alcoholic. (11 years) He doesn't keep hard alcohol in the house anymore, just beer and wine. I need to know if the verbal abuse I receive is because he is an alcoholic, or mentally ill? You can see him trying all the time but it is when we get in little "stupid" fights, he goes bollistic with his reason and rationale. He blames everything on me and said I caused his reaction.
An episode happened yesterday where he didn't call me back when he said he would be home at 12:00, afternoon. When he finally got home (4:30) , I asked him to apologize to my daughter and I for not calling us when he would be later than expected. (I was nice about it too.) He said, say sorry, for what. For supporting you, for making money for you. For, so on and so on."
I immediately felt like I did something wrong and felt like he only reacted this way becuase he is drinking the Hard Stuff again. I can't prove it, and I HOPE with all my heart he is just on edge and it was my fault. What I do know is I am tired of being made to feel guilty and have to hear such abusive things about myself.
I am a really strong person ( i thought ) but I don't know what to do know what to do anymore. I am tired of apologizing for things I don't think were wrong. Especially when I am trying to raise a strong girl.

Please help me tell the difference.

nandm

I started a new thread for you as I feel your question might get lost here. For responses to your question see the thread titled "Functioning alcoholic or mental illness".
Here is the link to it...

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...l-illness.html


Welcome to SR and our alcoholism forum. Glad you are here.