BackToSquareOne

I have read a lot on these forums about everyones struggles with alcoholism. Most alcoholics seem to be regular abusers but binge drinkers don't really fit that mold. What I mean by this is that in looking back at my history of binge drinking I have always been able to stop for long periods of time. Some of the tests for alcoholism that were posted claim that a real alcoholic could not stop or drink moderately for any length of time. I however have been able to stop for long periods and even only have a few drinks if I was in a situation where drinking to excess was not an option. This makes me wonder if binge drinkers don't have a much harder time accepting the fact that they even have a problem simply because they can turn it off for long periods of time.
I ended up in a psych ward back in 1991 after almost drinking myself to death on a particularly bad binge. The psychiatrist said that I had a typical alcoholic type personality (if there is such a thing) and I tended to rationalize everything to the Nth degree. He also said that binge drinkers were hard to treat as a good percentage of them refuse to accept that they have a problem. In looking back I can see that he was right and I think that the ability to stop for long periods (with no form of treatment) gives binge drinkers the false impression that they don't really fit the criteria of an alcoholic and therefore don't have a problem.
When I did attend meetings I could not relate to a lot of what AA had to offer such as the aspect of being powerless over alcohol, hell I proved this wrong ever time I stopped for long periods of time. What my question would therefore be is do you think that binge drinkers are somehow different as they don't really fit the mold of what AA would define as an alcoholic?

Last Call

I was a long term "regular" heavy drinker, when I started the process of addressing this I morphed into a binge drinker. As you described I could go for periods of time with no alcohol, occasionally moderate, but inevitably I would go off the deep end in a binge lasting some number of days. These binges always reached absurd depths, large quantities of alcohol, round the clock drinking, blackouts, hurting myself, very dangerous behavior. Ultimately it was the total loss of control during these binges that convinced me I was truly powerless.

mrhodes01

Every drinker is different--the common thing that gets us all to AA is the realization that we can't handle life anymore, with or without alcohol.

In my younger days, I drank and did drugs every day. Eventually, I simply couldn't handle it anymore--my body was literally breaking down at age 23. Since I'm an alcoholic, I needed to figure out a way to not die but keep drinking, and I then embarked on an 11-year journey to find that perfect balance of normalcy and idiocy.

Unfortunately, alcoholics of my kind don't have the luxury of attaining normalcy. I turned into a binge drinker, and since every time I drank was the last time, I drank harder and longer than ever before, landing myself in some horrific situations with increasingly punitive consequences.

I agree with your assertion that we bingers tend to be more hard-headed because we've stopped so many times before. I used quit for two weeks, four months, more than a year--then I'd turn around and say, "Look what I fixed. My life is fine if I only drink every _ months." I always bounced back from the wreckage, but I was stuck in a purgatory I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy: I didn't want to drink, but I didn't want to embrace AA, so I had to wander miserably in between. Every second I drank, I thought about not drinking, and every second I was sober I thought about drinking.

Luckily I'm desperate enough now and have lost enough to realize I need a psychic change just to survive. I'm hoping my renewed dedication to AA will help me get there.

If you harbor any thoughts about being alcoholic, I suggest exploring recovery options and getting into the solution immediately. Otherwise, if you're a binge drinker like me, you're just a ticking time bomb.

Best of luck.

MR

tommyk

Every time I decided I was only going to drink a few beers, I changed my mind, and drank about 12+ beers.

It wasn't that I couldn't stop after a few beers, I just didn't want to stop after having a few beers.

It was a big problem in that I never knew what was going to happen once I started drinking.

I don't drink at all now.

Artur

I'm sorry but ^^^^This sounds like being powerless over alcohol to me my friend....and unmanageability also comes to mind. Don't fool yourself....binge drinkers DO fall into the mold of AAs description of the alcoholic....Read Bills story...also read More about Alcoholism in the BB.

Check it out, Man!

Good Luck to you,

suki44883

It's not how often you drink, it's how you handle drinking and how you handle NOT drinking.

Sugah

I don't think long dry periods indicate control. I did that when I was pregnant. Or occasionally being able to stop. My will power worked every now and then, if I caught it before I got too drunk or feared consequences too much. It was no fun to moderate, but on the rare occasion when I knew I'd be in deep **** if I didn't, I could do it. If I really had control, I'd be able to moderate every time and abstain from some of the insane behaviors I knew would result in painful consequences (such as driving while drinking, being offensive and hurtful to those I love with my words and actions, restrain my temper, etc).

Well, I've applied your reasoning to my drinking, and it failed. Maybe we're different?

Peace & Love,
Sugah

CarolD

I wonder why you return to drinking
after long periods of abstinance?

IIt seems foolhardy to continue
to add toxins to your brain and body
whether you are an alcoholic or not.

JMO

BackToSquareOne

Carol that's the million dollar question I don't really know why I return to it. I've had the urge lately to stop at the liquor store and couldn't give you even one sane reason why I would do that. I have been to AA over the years but when I'm not drinking I have a hard time relating to the meetings and usually stop going.

CarolD

Hmm...
Of course....AA is not for everyone. For me....
when I finished my formal Step work
I did feel a shift ...a psychic change described in the Doctors Opinion

However... my point is there might be an
unexplored factor bringing you back to alcohol.
....Tried counseling?

Gee...I don't know....and wish
I had a concrete answer for you.

Bard

Well lets see here. My own personal pattern I started off a binge drinker (or a weekend warrior as I like to cal it) then became a every day drinker. Controlled it for a while by being a binge drinker. Then a everyday drinker. And left off at binge drinking. You see a pattern there?

laurie6781

Actually back when the Big Book was written, One of the Alcoholics referred to was a "Periodic" (yep a binge drinker). What Dr. Silkworth and others suggested and found out that if a periodic continued long enough they would eventually become a daily drinker, as the periods of abstinence got smaller and smaller and the binges got closer and closer together.

AA works for all type of alcoholics if they want to work the AA Program.

Binge Drinker, Daily Drinker, or whatever, the longer the practice continues, the worse it gets.

Alcoholism is progressive!

There are other programs, SMART, etc

However, no program will work unless the individual is ready to work towards sobriety.

J M H O

Love and hugs,

austingemini

BackToSquareOne, ditto that. I think what makes being a binge drinker (speaking from personal experience) is that not only is it more difficult for you to identify, but your friends and family to recognize as well. Your friends (in my case girlfriend) sees you drink only once every few weeks, sometimes it even appears moderately controlled (3-5 drinks sort of thing - again, I said 'appears controlled'). Other times it's pantless running through central park telling strangers how much you love them and wish they'd come home and spoon with you.

Day: 5

ThisIsTheDay

Well I have to agree with Last Call...

"I would go off the deep end in a binge lasting some number of days. These binges always reached absurd depths, large quantities of alcohol, round the clock drinking, blackouts, hurting myself, very dangerous behavior. Ultimately it was the total loss of control during these binges that convinced me I was truly powerless."

I think once you quit or try to moderate for me at least is what tiggers the binge...Like I am making up for lost drinking time or tryin to reach a alcohol buzz level. The bottom line is, there is no reason to drink at all! I am back today after a short but dangerous bender....truly powerless over the booze!

TorontoGuy28

BackToSquareOne - this sounds exactly like my situation.

I had to be honest with myself, do I think about more drinks after the first 1 or 2 or 3 ? Do I want more ? The answer is yes. The fact that I stop, means really nothing, because the craving is there and I will eventually binge drink for a day or two (typically on the weekend)... One drinks leads to 20 for me, that 20 might not come on the same night, but they do evenutally come. So staying away from it all together is the best thing.

All the best.

RobbyRobot

hi SquareOne

i edited your post above to bring home a question... how many more "bad binges" do you think you have in you before you *quit* for good. who knows really i guess... drunk is drunk and alcoholics do die drunk my friend, and so what is an appropriate epitaph for your paticular quirk in drinking?

//\\ here stays dead a binge drinker. an alcoholic? who knew? //\\

and as for you not having any form of treatment, well let's see, attending recovery f2f meetings, medical services and counsel, sharing yourself in a online recovery fellowship... ok, you can hear good i'm sure, you have had some treatment already imo.

ok so the longest i could stop alcohol was 30 days. i also drank daily for months on end. i had to detox in rehab for three months just to get my life a chance to start. so what kind of animal does that make me? hahaha. i dunno, and i don't care much to find out. drinking is drinking and drunk is drunk. all behind me now baby.

i just want to give you something *hard* to wonder about here, so my talk is a bit tough, i guess. just take what you need and leave the rest. you have to decide for yourself if you're addicted to alcohol or not. the thing is this: if your asking for a definition, you prolly got yourself a problem that needs attention.

Freedom1990

Agreed