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Final Bottom Hello. I am back after a long time boozing. I am on day 11 today and feel great. I've lost some weight, gotten some sleep, worked out quite a bit and feel fantastic. I reached a new and final bottom 11 days ago. I am so grateful to be sober. I finally feel alive again. I just got back from vacation and had such a wonderful time spending time w/ my family. No hangovers, no worrying about when I can drink, no putting my son to bed right on time so I could drink in piece, no ridiculous conversations about god knows what, no waking the neighbors, no eating late at night, no smoking, no ********... Just me and my family enjoying each other. I hate drinking... I can't believe what it's made me do and give up. Not anymore, not ever again! Good luck all! |
glad your here....keep us posted on your recovery! |
Hi and welcome, do you have a plan for when you crave a drink? Because if you're an alcoholic like me, that time will come. Be prepared. I couldn't do it alone, and besides coming here, I attend regular AA meetings. Whatever you decide, I wish you the very best. |
http://i273.photobucket.com/albums/j...At_The_Sky.jpg I was very similar to you very early in my Recovery. I had many blips in Recovery over the years, but this last time, very early on, I had felt better than I ever did, I saw hope, I began sleeping better, taking care of myself . . . it's like I was reborn. I knew something was different this time. . . but I couldn't quite put my finger on it for quite awhile. Then I realized, I had surrendered. I knew if nothing changed, nothing would change. I knew that in order to move on and be in Recovery from the depths of hell my addiction lead me to, I had to put just as much energy, if not more, into my Recovery as I did when I was using. You sound very determined to continue to grow in your Recovery and I hope you continue to share with us on your Journey to Freedom. Congratulations on Your New Found Peace. And let me tell you, even though you will still have struggles with every day life, a Clean and Sober life gets better and better than you could ever dream life could be. God Bless, Judy |
What great news! :cheer Blessings to you and your family |
Welcome!! I am so glad that you are here. You sound like me a few months ago. I had been dry before and had quit drinking for a day or 2 or 3 here and there but had never really accepted my alcoholism. I came from a long family of alcohol troubles so it was no news to me I just needed to pull my head out of the sand! It is amazing how much time we spend planning how and when to drink. From putting the kids to be to planning grocery trips it was alot of work. Now I just enjoy every minute of every day!! Sobriety Rocks!! |
I truly hope you hang onto how you are feeling now and don't go back. We do senseless things for some reason, and I bet your family is very happy now too. What we do affects everyone close to us too. Congrats... so happy to hear a good story, so enjoy it :) |
Congrats on those 11 days and the "awakening"! I had an awakening also, I saw death. If you find your self struggling I highly reccommend a program of recovery, I tried staing sober many times on my own and could never stay sober long, it took a program of recovery for me to stay sober and happy as well. I used AA and continue to do so, there are other programs as well, if you find your self having a hard time, start checking out different programs before you start to check out drinking again. |
Thanks for the kind words everyone. I went to bed at 9pm and woke up at 2am... Being sober is such a strange trip. I actually have feelings again. I was in the worst mode all day today, but it turns out I was tired. Alcohol masked so many feelings / emotions. Today would have been a day where I would have gotten very drunk. Instead, had a good dinner, ice cream, then went to sleep. I feel pretty good right now. I'm not prepared for the moods swings associated with life. In time I know it will get better, but today it hit me that I dealt with feelings by drinking. Good luck everyone. Today is the start of my 13th day. I am not going to drink today! |
Well done hughs dad! today it hit me that I dealt with feelings by drinking. |
Congrats on day 13, that is awesome. |
hughs dad- Welcome to SR! It's great that you are feeling so good about being sober. It's such a good feeling to not have to revolve one's life around alcohol. |
Right on Hughs Dad! We are about at the same place, I hit rock bottom, and haven't drank for 13 days or so... Good luck to you! Welcome here... Heavy |
Peace and congrats on your tough stand brother! I crested 30 days sober myself and am now fully seeing how badly I lost touch with my kids because of my own stupidity. But here we are my friend, with a goal and a new purpose in life, to regain what we had and not squander what lies ahead of us. I sometimes think that I'm about as spineless as a jellyfish, and if I can be sober and face life, you can sail right on through this. Keep your eyes on your family and remember that they were here first and need to stay first in your life, cause I can definitely say from being the dad to 2 wonderful little girls, you are #1 in the kids book and they need you. Your little man will look to you for all the answers, and it seems that you have found one and can now live it out! My prayers are with ya! F |
It is truly gratifying to see so many who have made the conscious decision working to live differently and responding in this thread. I remember those early days; the intensity of emotional upheaval as my body, mind and spirit initially began recovery was a rollercoaster; extreme highs and devastating lows. This too shall pass. By commencing a daily program of action outlined in the Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and with the power of a Being greater than I, you can and will recover. Now that you have this tremendous beginning, do not turn back. If you are truly full of booze and have found a Power greater than you, now is the time to roll up your sleeves and get to work. What brought you to this point did not happen overnight, nor will recovery happen overnight, though you can achieve much each day if you are resolute in your dedication to a greater Power and to learning how to successful function in this new life. Your answers did not work before, so question everything. Ask and you will receive a bounty of opportunity you never dreamed possible. Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in this world by chance. If I can help, please let me know and welcome to SR and a new life. Ron |
I am responding to my own posts. Five days after I posted this I drank again. Since then I have drank at least every other day with a minimum of 10 drinks per sitting. This disease is terrible. I am 3 days sober now. Have been going to meetings. Good luck everyone. |
Sorry to hear that Hughs Dad and if only our kids could keep us sober eh? I'd have tried starting my own football team or something. You may want to reread the post directly above yours as the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous also talks about excactly you described. Feel great. Life great. Family Great. I'm Fine. 3 days later....glug, glug, oh my god how'd this start again....??? Let say if alcoholism is a war for one's soul, now would be a good time for you to call in the reserves rather than go deeper into the battle alone... |
Good to have you back and it was good to reread all the posts in this thread. I read my own and it made me smile! You too can look back to this post and smile if that is what you want!! |
I read through this post and it made me think about how many "final bottoms" that I've lived through. We drink, get direly ill both physically and mentally, go through withdrawal and swear that this is it we will never drink again. A few months go by and the last episode becomes a distant memory and we delude ourselves into thinking that we can drink again. There is an insanity to it all, doing the same thing over and over again knowing what the end result will be but we do it anyhow. I'm at the point where I can only hope that my last binge will truely be my "final bottom", can I say that fore sure, no. |
I read somewhere that only 15 percent of people who decide to quit drinking, including those who work with a sobriety program, are still sober one year later. I'm not sure where I read it so I can't be sure it's true, but it's still scary to me. I try not to let it discourage me, but instead use it as a reminder that I have to put my whole self into this and do everything I can to insure my sobriety. Alcoholism is scary stuff. |
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